The guy I’m dating takes a while to reply and speaks to loads of womenb?

[Anonymous]

I’m dating a guy and he’s told me he’s only dating me and me only and how he likes me and his goal is to make me his and have me. But in i way I think it’s bs and he just wants to get with me. He takes forever to reply and it pisses me off because if you want me u have to try harder. Is it clingy if I say a joke about his reply time. He’s quite a jokey free spirited guy. But I’m stating to feel like a side piece here. I mean should I make a joke about feeling like a side piece or something lol.

Updates

+1 y

Or saying something like he’s gonna have to try harder to get me. Because it just annoys me. I know he’s probably not even online since I’ve checked but still lol

Updates

+1 y

I’m losing interest when he takes long

[Adam1978]

Use the phone and call him if you want instant response. Texting means slow back and forth and low priority. You should always assume he text other girls even if he doesn't go on date with them. That how online dating works. You have multiple and you can't expect to be solo until multiple dates in, where you have proven your worth it.

[FilmGuy93]

I mean… just to be real with you; you are an option to him. You might be a great option, but you’re still just an option

[Asker]

But I don’t want to be a option. I’m not insecure or anything I know I’m great but how do i even escape being a option in dating?

[FilmGuy93]

With him, specifically? You have to find a way to create additional value in his life. The time to set boundaries for stuff like that is very early on in the interaction. If your expectation is that you want to be exclusive and his priority; you have verbalize that and provide him some value to justify the additional benefit to you. My girlfriend and I have a somewhat open arrangement. She and I are still basically loyal to each other because we bring each other peace. I wouldn’t do anything to disrupt her peace because making her my priority makes my life so much better.

I understand the value that she adds to my life. You need to find a way to add value to his life

[Asker]

I think the only value I’d add to his life is if I have sex with him but it’s very early on. Not because I don’t have anything to offer I have loads to offer but I feel like he sees me as a trophy to win or something. Would you say it’s too early to say that in a jokey way then? He’s said it to me quite a few times. He’s been begging to date me for the past 3 months and I’ve only just said yes

[FilmGuy93]

Don’t “joke” about things like that lmao it’s so unbelievably cringe when women do that. Don’t guess about ways you can add to his life; tell him that that is what you want to do and ask him how to do it sometime in the next month. I took the initiative with my girl. I told her exactly what I needed from her. And that’s what I want you to do with him. Tell him what you need, and insist that he satisfy those needs before you have sex with him.

[Asker]

Yeah haha that’s true I thought men would prefer if it was said in a jokey way but I can see why it would be quite cringe. Do you think I should just say ‘I don’t like this inconstancy if you want me try harder’ and that’s it and in a serious manner then rather than a joke

[FilmGuy93]

Rather than “try harder” you should say exactly what you want him to do. The problem isn’t how hard he’s trying, the problem is that his communication style doesn’t work with your’s. You need to tell him that you want to come to an agreement about how you guys will communicate. Me and my girl are horrible texters. It works because I only text her 2 times per week and I don’t care if she takes a long time to get back to me. But that’s because we spoke and figured out that that is what works for us.

[Emanon25]

Tell him that you don’t like to wait long for his reply.