I’m 18 and I’m not interested in sex yet but I want a boyfriend and most guys my age expect sex in relationship. What should I do?

[Anonymous]

I’m 18 and I’m not interested in sex yet nor have an ever had a boyfriend. I don’t like am like asexual or something but I’m just not ready or even think about people in the way.

And by sex I mean like anything sexual I’m just not into it right now

I’ve liked tons of guys but never in like a “I wanna have sex with you way.”

To me relationships are kissing, cuddling, going on dates, holding hands etc. that doesn’t really correlate to sex in my mind.

I want a boyfriend but must guys my age expect sex at this point and I’m just not there. What should I do?

Updates

1 y

I don’t think I’m asexual*** I’m just not interested in that stuff yet

[quaranta]

Yeah, "most guys". But you will end up with one, not 100, so maybe the research will go slower and through different channels than dating apps (for sure), but a guy who is more focused on other aspects will surely come along at some point. Nonetheless, if you go in asexual forums or groups, guys there would be available (if they are single) for relationships that don't include sex, but all the rest, like you. You don't need to be an asexual for real to interact with asexuals, you know, and many of them are not even sure.
I think you should go for a virgin guy who would explore the same phases with you (about understanding sexuality, sensuality, intimacy, etc, with no hurry). Perhaps, if you bond with guys through a place dedicated for common interests (courses, sports, online themed communities), you would end up in a friendship before an actual relationship, based on how like-minded you are, and maybe that would make their interest in you more broad than just your body. You would give them more than that.

[BlueScorpio]

Just make your boundaries known and let them know you are not ready for that step yet until the relationship is solid or you are married. If they chose to walk away from you over lack of sex, then that will let you know those guys aren't right for you. Also keep in mind that you are young and have plenty time to date. If you can't find a guy who's on the same wavelength as you right now, then just focus on yourself for the time being.

[YourFavoriteFriend]

Then I think that you should not make a realationship. I actually rejected the only girl that was interested in me (there may be others ones that were but I never learned) mostly for that reason (not only that but that was the last straw). Well, in my case I actually dodged a bulled because of what I learn later but you get my point.

I know that this may sound unfair and suck but life is very much unfair and we all have to do things that we don't like constantly. Especially to get/stay in a relationship. And talking about "love" and "completion", sex is part of that and you cannot call blame guys for want it.

The good news however is that you are very young and you can wait (I'm 21 and still haven't kissed a girl) and that there are some guys that don't care about sex and feel comfortable as well.

Good luck!

[Jamie05rhs]

Wow. You rejected a girl who actually liked you because she didn't want to have sex? Wow, that was pretty dumb, my friend. (I was going to be a lot harsher, but I don't want to bully you.)

[YourFavoriteFriend]

@Jamie05rhs LMAO, you have a very high view of yourself if you think I care what you think "my friend".

Yeah, and that was the best move I did. That bitch admitted that "she knew that I'll complain sooner or later" but she stilled proceed to move on and I only found out that she didn't wanted sex because I dug and had the balls to directly push, ask and find out. So she was knew I will not like it but wanted to make me catch feelings for her hopping that I'll stay.

She's one of the worse human beings I know. Keep been an idiot and stuck to "deeper meanings" "my friend" but I'm not an idiot anymore.

[Jamie05rhs]

Okay. Nevermind. I'll let you have it now. Lol

This is why you're a retard: This chick actually liked you. And she wanted to have a relationship with you. All you had to do was respect her wishes and hold off on the sex.
If you had been smart and invested in her back then, you would be fucking her right now.

... You're an idiot. 😆

[BlueScorpio]

@Jamie05rhs thank you, this is what us women have to deal with these days. We get men telling us not to be whores or have any kind of body count but the second guys like this dude find out they aren't getting any, any tune soon they want to trash us. This is why it's so important for women to be extremely picky and vet heavily so we can avoid guys like this.

[Jamie05rhs]

@BlueScorpio You're welcome.

[Summeroflove]

Nope. Totally understand. You just have morals and values and dignity. Date Christian men waiting until marriage. People who have standards like yourself.

If a man ever asks for sex on the first date. DUMP HIM!!!

Nobody is entitled to sex. Good people want a strong romantic life and how you feel is normal.

[OlderAndWiser]

You just need to let guys know that up front and expect to have most of them quickly lose interest.

[inhua]

expect as in "want" or "demand"?

wanting is quite normal. demanding is not and would cross a boundary.

that being said, these boundaries you have need to be upheld consistently for every guy regardless of how attractive or not attractive you find him. there's no point in being taken seriously for romances and dates if you've already had hook-ups and ONS.

[Asker]

These literally are not boundaries I have no sexual desire for any man or woman. I have never developed an interest in sex or anything sexual with anyone ever. I’ve never even had a boyfriend before.

[Asker]

Expect as in want enough to end a relationship over it.

[inhua]

want enough is closer to demand but if someone is willing to end it over that (provided you have no prior history of inconsistent boundaries), then they're not the right person for you.

[D-Pad_Chad]

Tell a doctor. Going to say something to few people say these days. Everyone past puberty should have a sex drive, if not there might be a medical issue. Law drive, for men and women, could be a sign of hormonal imbalance or other health problems. I recommend making sure it's not health related.

[BlueScorpio]

Not being ready for sex or rushing into sex doesn't mean you have hormone imbalance. It's called taking things slow and actually wanting to build a relationship with someone instead of immediately just fucking 🤦‍♀️

[D-Pad_Chad]

I misunderstood. I read it as not having a sex drive, which honestly your description still sounds like it and it's nothing to get a blood test, but good on you for waiting. Very respectable.

I'd recommend looking towards older men, usually guy's get themselves sorted around early 30s, but I also know that's not the most appealing prospect for young women sometimes.

That being said, sex will be something every man will want eventually and if you're unwilling to put out, somewhere down the road, then him leaving or cheating will be inevitable.

I wish you the best of luck though, that's a hard place to be in.

[Asker]

That comment wasn’t from me it was from another person. I’ve run hormone checks and everything with nothing coming back wrong but I developed no interest in sex during puberty. I’m not waiting I’m genuinely just not physically interested.

[Asker]

Maybe that will change at some point because as I said I’m 18 but I have no idea when so for now sex it completely off the table in a relationship.

[D-Pad_Chad]

My apologies, I should have read the name 😆 but my advice is still relevant to your situation and I do wish you the best of luck.

[ArrowheadSW]

Don't do anything that you are not comfortable with, or not ready for. Heck, I'm a guy and I didn't feel like I was ready for sex yet at 18. I felt more ready a bit later. I was interested in it for sure and had a high libido, but I didn't feel ready for it until say, 20 or so.

[llovemakeup]

I’m 17 and that’s exactly how l feel l want a boyfriend too but l feel intimidated because they all seem to want that one thing which is sex and it’s something I feel uncomfortable with and not ready and not interested in. I wish relationships were all about the cuddling, kissing that type of thing as well but to the men it all seems to lead to sex and that’s what seems to be most important to them and girls feel pressured as men are like this and now l don’t know if l want a boyfriend because that’s what they all want which is a put off to me

[Jamie05rhs]

They're not ALL like that. 90% of them are, yes. But you do have the 10% of guys that will wait. You just really have to be aware of who you're talking to. Don't let any of these little boys make you fall for their bullshit.

[Faith18letsgo]

Totally get that. I do like the idea of sex but I’m not going to lie I’d be happy and full with just the other parts of a relationship.
I think the best thing to do is be friends with guys so you can some how gently let them know you don’t want sex. Then pursue a relationship with them and if that’s a deal breaker then that’s ok.

[Man-O-Metal]

Trust me, there's guys out there that are willing to wait. I haven't had "it" yet and I don't plan to until I get married. And I'm looking for a girl who feels the same way. I've found girls who feel the same way, just not ones I'd like to marry. And I know guys that are waiting too. It's much easier to find the opposite. So I'm sure you've heard it already, but this will test your patience to the highest degree. Just don't let yourself grow frustrated or desperate.

[Aerissa_Jade]

No big deal, just make it clear your not going to do that. Maybe say your waiting until marriage, (even if you are or aren't.) At least if he continues to want to date you, then your fine and he understands.

Maybe at some point when your with someone and kissing, it will turn into making out and the thought will enter your mind on, I wonder what this feels like.

No rush though, take your time and any man that is decent will respect that.

[integrale77]

It's going to be hard work to find a guy who just wants a romantic relationship maybe try some dating apps and state your intentions.

I know you say you are not Asexual maybe your Demisexuality and you will feel that need for sex when you feel a shared emotional connection.

[Anonymous]

If I were you I wouldn’t sacrifice my morals and boundaries for the sake of being in a relationship. There are still plenty of men out there who will respect your desire to wait, not give you an ultimatum and make you feel obligated to have sex in order to keep him. Be patient, focus on yourself and eventually the right guy will find you. Like my boyfriend, he came out of no where when I least expected it.

[Asker]

The thing is it’s not waiting. I have no interest in sex and I have no idea when I will could be tomorrow could be never. So there’s no guarantee for the guy. I don’t know where you’re finding all these guys that are ok with nothing sexual at all?

[Opinion Owner]

Ohh okay, I guess I just assumed you weren’t wanting sex for moral or religious reasons, but obviously just not being interested in it is fine as well. Maybe it’s just a matter of finding the right person. You’re 18, so my guess is that a lot of guys you’ve encountered were in high school and some guys in that age range can be immature and off putting. Maybe now that you’re out in the world, you’ll meet someone that changes your mind. But there is no rush for that. I’d say to be upfront with the guy, and maybe not take sex entirely off the table, but say you aren’t interested in it right now.

[fembotnpc777]

There really aren't "a ton of men" who would do that. I'm tired of this myth.

[Opinion Owner]

I said there’s plenty, not a ton, and I don't know about you but in my mind that’s a pretty big difference. It’s unfortunate that this sounds like some fantastical myth but not every man out there is sex crazed or flat out won’t date a woman if she won’t give it up. I can’t even say it’s a location thing as to where these men exist, it’s just about people’s morals and what’s important.

[fembotnpc777]

There's not plenty. "Not every man out there is sex crazed or flat out won’t date a woman if she won’t give it up." False. They are all exactly like that, except that one man who's made out of straw.

[Opinion Owner]

For example, my best friend who’s previously a dating coach advised practicing celibacy until either in a very committed relationship or actually married. I’m not a wait until marriage sort of girl, but with my boyfriend we didn’t have sex until almost 5 months into our relationship.

[Opinion Owner]

You sent your response at the same time I sent mine, so I’ll quickly address what you just said. I’m not out to change your mind or convince you of a single thing. If you think what I say is false, that is completely fine with me.

[fembotnpc777]

It's a myth. I have 31 years experience as a virgin, and men very aggressively reject you for this. Religious men are the same way. It's not even an option for women to wait until marriage anymore.

[Opinion Owner]

To say it’s a myth is quite unworldly of you, and I mean no offense in saying that. You’re right, there are men out there who will aggressively reject you for not putting out, but there are also the men who will respect your boundaries and be patient. Not every single man is one thing, just as not every woman is one thing, and you are an example of that as a 31 year old virgin, not someone who’s already had sex. I’m sorry you’ve yet to experience a man who isn’t out to please his flesh, but they exist. I’m grateful to the men in my family who have set an example of this, and instilled within me the confidence to uphold my morals and limits. I don’t do anything I don’t want to until I’m ready, and if a man can’t respect then he’s not the one. I’m not afraid to lose because i know my worth. You can speak on your experience and are entitled to your views/opinions, but don’t shove it down other people’s throat as if it’s universal fact. Things don’t work like that.

[fembotnpc777]

I have already had sex, at this point. I was also actively looking for someone for 30 years, not sitting back and waiting for God to hand me someone.

I didn't have these experiences because of something my parents did or didn't teach me. I had them because these are the men who are available to date.

I mean, you should be humbly grateful you had good luck, but I'm not going to paint butterflies and rainbows say "there's this big group of other guys somewhere who are exactly what you dream". It's not the case. It's sad that it's not the case, but people need to realize that wishful thinking is not going to change reality. It doesn't do anybody any favors to be dishonest like this.

[Opinion Owner]

And you think you’re doing anybody favors by essentially saying “no point holding out if you ever have hope for a relationship, no man is gonna wait for you to be ready”, that’s absolutely defeatist and toxic, which is not a mentality I’d encourage you or anyone else for that matter to get comfortable with. Your approach to dating isn’t everyone else’s, and that’s fact. With the way you wrote this, it sounds like you obligated yourself to have sex for the sake of getting or maintaining a man, and that is your choice to live with. I actively dated all through my 20s, but never did I have sex to keep someone, or get them, simply because I always knew my worth and respected my own boundaries. Do you think men ever weaken theirs even a bit? Heck no. That’s why you get men who are firm in their decisions, and as a result get their way, one way or another. If they say they won’t date you without sex, it’s either you’re with it or get lost. If you’re the type of woman to face these ultimatums and fold because you’ve given up hope of finding a proper man then that’s on you, girl. But I am extremely firm in my way, and as a result I have a man who has respected every one of my limitations without any flukes. I didn’t wait around for him to come into my life or god to hand him to me, I dated with intention.

[fembotnpc777]

"With the way you wrote this, it sounds like you obligated yourself to have sex for the sake of getting or maintaining a man"
Never happened.
" If you’re the type of woman to face these ultimatums and fold because you’ve given up hope of finding a proper man then that’s on you, girl. "
Never happened, and I've demonstrated the kind of morality you pretend to have throughout my lifetime.
You're, as a liar, lying again. "So and so isn't having luck because they must have done this bad thing that I just made up to justify my point."

"And you think you’re doing anybody favors by essentially saying “no point holding out if you ever have hope for a relationship, no man is gonna wait for you to be ready”, that’s absolutely defeatist and toxic, which is not a mentality I’d encourage you or anyone else for that matter to get comfortable with." I tell the truth for its own sake, not to get a reaction out of people. That's how you view truth: a means to an end. You're dishonest.

I'm not here to go in loops on loops with Queen Know it All. You're completely free to give your vapid
feel-good opinions on absolutely everything, so just like go ahead and have your little thought dump/ last word/ winning argument/ petty bs thing. Try not to be any amount of reflective on how you got your own boyfriend to stay. I have a great idea, how about you keep pointing fingers and projecting onto me your own feelings of guilt?

Just keep doing it! It will work! You hate me because I force you to look at your own life honestly, and you're more comfortable with illusion. Go have your little dash of sass response though, can't wait to hear all your little deep and interesting prospectives. I'll let you finish that out, okay? Just don't forget to invent some bullshit about me on the way out!

[Opinion Owner]

Okay, you’re clearly in your feelings with all the “morality you tend to have”, “Queen know it all” comments, and I’d rather not take it there so let’s make a big loop back to the point and stick to that if you decide to comment back. You’re saying that to have any hope of getting a boyfriend, the asker has to cave and have sex, even if she’s not ready, even if she doesn’t want to. That is your humble opinion, and advice based off your life choices. Let me ask, where did that get you? Are you currently in a happy relationship with the man, or men, you have it up to? My guess is no, because only a spiteful person would sit here and tell someone trying to maintain celibacy that it’s a waste of time. There are men who will wait, fembot, and just because you couldn’t tolerate your loneliness and gave a guy the only thing you felt would keep him around, doesn’t mean she has to. I will always be on the “wait til you’re ready” train, and tell people that it’s not hopeless to find someone who respects those boundaries, because they exist. I never said it would be easy, but it’s not some hopeless mission.

[Opinion Owner]

You know fembot, I already shared my opinion and I’d be surprised if you respond to that in the first place, but after a bit of reflection and a lot of disgust I genuinely have to say how dare you. As a woman, argue with me and treat my encouragement for the asker to go at her own pace, as blasphemy. You say that I’m projecting, but what exactly? Hope? Positivity? Sharing my story of maintaining boundaries and getting a positive outcome as something impossible and negative? My god I cannot imagine your defeat, being a virgin for 30 years, then losing it and chopping that up to “at this point”, because you gave up. Are you jealous she is still celibate? Or disappointed that you couldn’t take it anymore? I am projecting a positive outcome, not “hating” you (which is dumb asf to say because who are you to me? Why do you feel important enough in my life to trigger that much of a feeling towards you?). You can’t wait to hear my little this or bullshit that... stop the childish name calling and take accountability for your choices. Better yet, stop trying to doom people to being single and hopeless. Stop pushing that shitty narrative of “the only way to get a man is to screw one” that you couldn’t overcome. Not everyone is you, and you’d realize that if you weren’t so self centered.

[fembotnpc777]

So you're trying to hold me to a moral high ground that you've admitted not having yourself? You also assume that I "gave up" my morals, so that it makes you look like a better person. Basically, you're just calling me names, so that you look better.

It's a very difficult world for women who don't want to , for whatever reason, put out. You're not a part of that world. You wouldn't know that. It's not an easy path to take.

I never at any point "folded on my morals" or whatever at age 30, but you never even had those morals to begin with, so who are you to judge. I look at the actual effort the person put in. I wouldn't judge someone who waited 30 and 40 years to have sex for their beliefs, passed up multiple opportunities, and then one day just said "fuck it" and had sex because they're a human being and they should be happy. Fuck people like you who are just pointing fingers at others for trying to have morals. You don't even give a fuck about yourself. Miss me with that fake girl power. You need to get over yourself.

[fembotnpc777]

The thing that I find you appallingly lack is empathy. You have shown a love of laughing at other people's hardships. That's why you're a shitty person. You think it's funny, because it didn't happen to you.

I don't know if the OP is ready to hear what I had to say, but if she listens to what I have to say, she'll be a lot more prepared than someone who lies up her ass telling her there are all these virgin men waiting for virgins. Saying that is just gaslighting. You have some serious problems.

[Opinion Owner]

Lol, so you quite literally make assumptions about me, call me names like a “shitty person” and whatever else, yet I’m the villain and all this lol talk about playing victim. Just a reminder, you popped up under MY comment, unwarranted, and have done nothing else but push your opinion onto me. So why you’re being so aggressive and defensive with your comments as if I’ve come to you is just weird as shit. At no point have I ever said I’m better than anyone else, so please stop being so emotional and lying. Another thing I would suggest you stop doing is projecting your mentality onto me, because I have a strong feeling that all these “assumptions” you keep saying I’m assuming, is just a reflection of what you feel on the inside. Not once have I judged you, I just repeated what you took it upon yourself to write. Saying “I’ve had sex at this point” doesn’t sound like anything other than you caving. If that’s not the case, then how about you clarify? That’s if you can write it out as a big girl and not spew all your name calling and narrative building upon me in the process. Speaking of which, you’ve done everything but answer my question: what has giving up your virginity done for you? I mean I’m guessing you’ve at least dated that one man, or other men, but are you in a happy relationship now? My point in all of this is really just to say stop projecting. If the asker isn’t ready for sex, why on gods green earth are you literally here fighting with me and saying the “hard truth” is that she has no choice? YOU had a choice, made it, and are where you are because of it. That is not an assumption, it’s not putting you down, it’s just a simple fact.

[Opinion Owner]

Also, im not sure if you’re just like, grazing over what I said because you won’t take the time to actually comprehend it, but please point out where I said virgin men are waiting for virgin women? You must’ve wrote that in the midst of blinding desperateness. I said there are men who will wait until she’s ready, and the fact that you keep coming here with your dark could and stinky opinions to dispute that is pathetic and strange. Maybe you couldn’t wait for the guy who would wait for you (which is true) but that doesn’t mean others have to travel your path of not so great decisions. I’m sure you will come back to hoot and whine, but at least be rational with what you say. Realistically it just isn’t irrational to say she can find someone who will respect her boundaries, other men have commented to back that up for crying out loud.

[Opinion Owner]

*dark cloud

[fembotnpc777]

If you act like a shitty person, people are gonna just assume that like you are one.

[Opinion Owner]

Speak for yourself babe, you’re doing a great job at it.

[Opinion Owner]

Just stop.

[Opinion Owner]

I won’t even read anything else you say from here on out, just delete it. Grow the fuck up and stop telling people how to live their lives. She is fine to wait, jerk.

[fembotnpc777]

Do you feel good about completely misrepresenting what I said on the way out by the way, oh saintly paragon of morality?

[Opinion Owner]

Where is the misrepresentation, fembot? I mean it’s there plain as day for anyone to read. I was completely civil with you, and you got so deep in your feelings that you’re name calling and being disrespectful. You’re terrible at trying to share a POV, you could’ve done that with a lot more Grace.

[Opinion Owner]

Fembot... you are under MY comment, telling me to stop talking lol. Listen love, at the end of the day, you’re telling her there is no other choice but to give up her virtue, because you gave up yours. Your word is law, written in the dating bible and everyone must abide, otherwise they are petty, argumentative cunts lol. Shut up and get in line, right? Get out in the world, touch some grass, realize there are millions of people living different lives and traveling different paths than you. If you feel like it’s some massive lie and exaggeration to tell her there are men who don’t just want sex and she should wait til she’s ready, then cool, enjoy that. I feel like that’s a lie but you don’t see me here saying my words are law. That’s you. I don’t give a shit for you to rehash your statements, I didn’t even fucking ask for them in the first place lol but you won’t stop. Go breathe somewhere.

[fembotnpc777]

I think you're unnecessarily mad about something that could have just been seen as a generic opinion. You're not happy unless you can make me out to be some evil villain for having an honest opinion about my own life experience. Behind your anonymous account, no less.

[Opinion Owner]

Okay, you’re trying really hard to deflect and flip the script, and that doesn’t work for me lol so let’s just be so for real. What exactly says that I’m mad? Because I’m the one telling the asker it’s ok for her to wait until she’s ready for sex, because yes there are men who will wait until she’s ready. What is so angry about that? Then, I ask you where giving up your virginity for you, and you ignore that question so maybe you’ll answer it now? I’m perfectly fine being anon, But are you mad because that means you can’t say some weird bullshit then block me? Probably so.

[Opinion Owner]

Asker, I came on here today realizing that your notifications get blown up as more comments are added, so I apologize for that lol. I just quickly wanted to acknowledge that out of the male comments, almost half of them are acknowledging the fact that you should wait until you feel ready for sex, which I am grateful to see because some people like fembot will tell you there’s no other choice. There is, and you have the proof. Go at your own pace, do what works for you and it won’t be easy but you will find the proper guy! I didn’t find mine until after years of dating. Good luck out there!🤍

[Anonymous]

So you say And by sex I mean like anything sexual I’m just not into it right now and after that To me relationships are kissing, cuddling, going on dates, holding hands etc.

Meaning that kissing and cuddling are "not anything sexual" according to you, and you in no way feel bodily turned on while doing those? 😶

[Asker]

No it’s just romantic stuff. I don’t get how that’s related to sex?

[Asker]

Cuddling or kissing someone it’s more like an admiration thing, it’s like my heart really feels a lot of love and appreciation for them. But it’s not like a sexual thing

[Opinion Owner]

Because if your body works normally, at your age, when you do those things you are sexually activated, as it were.
You say you don't think you are asexual, I say you may be, and should check this stuff with a doctor.

[CA4444]

It’s normal, even if all girls will mature differently and discover sexuality differently. Most men won't understand what you’re saying and that’s normal too. Don’t think too much and do what feels good for you.

[Shlikee]

That is a respectable mindset. There are guys that will understand and give you space. Sex shouldn't feel forced, if you have genuine love for eachother it may just lead to it. If he is forceful it will just turn you off and if sex does happen you will not like it. So keep being yourself. I value the emotional connection more, sex is just something that happens if the vibe is right.

[CindyRuns]

Stick with your convictions... nobody should have sex until they're ready for it and it feels right.

Doing it just because someone else wants you to is not a reason !!!

[Berethor]

Men give love for sex, woman give sex for love, and you sound asexual to me. :)

[User3191989]

Can't have a boyfriend, if you don't want sex

Otherwise, every person who had girl/boy "friends", would have "girlfriends and boyfriends", and everyone would be accusing each other of cheating on one another

[Asker]

But you don’t go on dates, kiss, cuddle, and hold hands with your friends. I don’t have romantic feelings for my friends. Are you really telling me guys only view romantic attraction as wanting to fuck?

[User3191989]

Yeah

[Asker]

that’s weird, I don’t think I’d wanna date guys like that anyways

[User3191989]

Welcome to life

[Asker]

I think it’s more like welcome to the weird mfs of the internet who think all men think like them. Thank god there are 4 billion other men on the planet!

[User3191989]

Hahahah, you’re in for a rude awakening hun

[YourFavoriteFriend]

> I think it’s more like welcome to the weird mfs of the internet who think all men think like them.

Ah, yeah! I have heard this so so so so many times! It's when you don't want to accept reality so you must make it seem like not everyone is the same. I was saying the same when my uncle and mother told me some things about young girls that I didn't liked. So I was like "not every girl is the same, there are exceptions". Fool and naive, I realized later that they were both right...

Like @User3191989 said, you are for a rude awakening. It's not that there aren't any guys that will not want sex in this age (and I don't count people that will wait for weeks till you give it but people that will wait for years) but if you want realistic numbers, then you are better off to either find why you don't feel comfortable having sex and fix it or becoming a lesbian (cause not wanting to day and stay alone isn't the best thing in my opinion).

Don't see these words as that we want to sound smart and make you feel bad. Actually, I don't talk about anyone else but I just want to help you and I only tell you the truth. The truth is always bitter and it hurts but it is what it is. Good luck!

[User3191989]

You don’t become gay, you’re born gay, just like your born straight

[YourFavoriteFriend]

Bet! What about bi people then? You can chose to be everything you want. I'm not saying it's easy but you can do it in the end of the day and by happy. In any case, OP isn't happy so it's an option.

[Jamie05rhs]

@Asker Don't listen to these idiots. You're actually right. They are wrong. Ignore them.

[Anonymous]

Realize if you really want something then you have to be willing to make sacrifices. If you really want a boyfriend then you should put some effort in on your part and be willing to have sex. I would say your lack of interest means you haven't found right guy.

[FilmGuy93]

If you aren't ready to have sex, then don't have sex. There isn't some contractual obligation to have sex with people just because they want to have sex with you.

[Bre_0611]

Dating while 18 and in your 20s will be very difficult. Expect for almost every guy you meet to only want sex because that is just the way it is.

[YourFavoriteFriend]

Wait. You want to say that when she gets in her 30s things will get better and that guy will not care about sex so much?

[Bre_0611]

@YourFavoriteFriend no I'm not saying that at all and I don't want it to come off that way. I'm just saying that overall man in their 20s typically are not ready for anything serious and that's not a bad thing that's just the way it is that's why marriage in 20s are very rare. It's like we're all still trying to literally figure out who we are as people in our lives but most times when we get older, it can be less confusing and serious relationships may be a little easier to find.

[YourFavoriteFriend]

Hmmmm. Maybe you are right. Or maybe you are wrong. I do have another idea. We see all these "movements" like redpill, blackpill, MGTOW, incel communities, etc. getting more and more popular so I guess the men (especially the western you are in the map) probably change and don't want the same things regardless of age. I mean, marriages decline in general in any age group so maybe that's the case. I have also seen a lot of girls saying that they give up on dating and things like that so I guess it's not only about guys.

I'm 21 for example and I would LOVE some VERY VERY SERIOUS. So it also differs from human to human. So you are also right. Both of our ideas are right I think.

[Bre_0611]

@YourFavoriteFriend you're right as well I completely agree. Marriage overall depends on the two individuals and it's a personal choice. I've heard older people say that they don't choose to be married so yes maybe it just depends on who you pick. It's hard these days that's for sure.

[slatyb]

Why do you want a boyfriend? Maybe you just want a girlfriend.

[Asker]

I’m not attracted to women. I've never been romantically interested in women though I have been romantically interested in men. I’ve never been attracted to anyone sexually regardless of gender ever.