Guys, When it comes to online dating, do men focus on one woman at a time?

Question

I’m currently on dating apps and I’m curious, when a man is genuinely interested in a woman and plans to go on a date with her, does he only talk to her or he continues to talk to other women? This guy I’m talking to said that im the only woman he talks to, but I find it odd because he is tall, attractive and has a great personality. I also lowkey feel bad because i talk to other guys at the same time.

dynamicyandere · Accepted Answer

It depends on the guy.

Also, as mentioned before, it depends on what stage or phase they are at with the dating.

Generally, I’d say…

Searching Phase - Most guys will be talking to multiple women.

Dating Phase - Some guys will continue talking to other women, some guys will stop when they start going on dates with a chosen girl.

Exclusive Phase - Guys SHOULD hold back on talking to other potential matches, but some guys will still want to keep their options open.

For me personally, I like to know if someone can hold a conversation with me before we even go out, so by the time I take time out of my day to go out on a physical date, I will have chosen them and will have friend-zoned my other options. To each their own though. 🥂

The_Shadow_Dweller · Accepted Answer

No one in their right mind would focus on a single woman in online dating. If they are in the searching phase.

If they are already with a girl, they should not focus on multiple girls. That is just crazy.

The thing is, women are very very very much in demand in online world. They get messages from everyone. So much so that girls who are just average looking or even below that, have over inflated egos. And that leads to over expectations for themselves. Which, not ironically. never get fulfilled. And then they blame guys for that.

In this cycle, rejection/ghosting is very very common for guys. So, no one in their right mind would focus on a single girls in the searching phase.

coachTanthony · Answer

No they talk to as many as they can handle and so should you in my opinion.

Anonymous · Answer

In online dating men are regarded as very cheap to women, who generally see soo many.

As such the odds of any one woman ever replying are extremely low, so a man has to write as many letters as possible if he wishes to talk to anyone.

If a woman actually does reply and start a conversation the odds still being against her agreeing to take it forward a man still has to keep looking for as many more and developing as many relationships as possible if he wishes to see any dates.

ShadezMcgee · Answer

As a guy you don't have the luxury of talking to many women at a time because the women have to respond. If the man hits it off with the woman she may be the only one he is technically talking to, however it would be foolish and against him to put his effort into just one option instead of talking to others or trying to connect with them until something exclusive is formed.

SolitaryWolf · Answer

I believe talking to two people at a time is the best method for me. However, if there is someone in particular that has "piqued my interest" so much that I have no desire to keep swiping, I don't. I can't seem to give the new person as much of my attention or enthusiasm if so. I still usually have two people in the "getting to know phase" if we are still making up our minds. Since I don't know anything about the person prior to meeting him on OLD, the getting to know phase is inevitable in my opinion. I try to have the exclusivity talk once I feel that we both have made up our minds. Before then, I feel that getting to know two people at once regulates my expectations and disappointments while also allowing me to get to know both people well enough. Personally, I can't handle any more if I'm to take this seriously.

Adam1978 · Answer

No dating sites are a number game, you can't do one by one as a guy. If you actually meet someone multiple times you probably freeze the number of girls you are in contact with. And focus on the one you got a connection with. And when it doesn't work out you resume it again.

HighValue · Answer

If I intended to actually meet irl and had already made those intentions clear, I wouldn't be talking to other women. If they didn't say they wanted to meet irl, then talking to others would be reasonable.

by the way, just because someone is attractive and appealing, that doesn't mean they want attention from lots of other people.

Wwwyzzerdd · Answer

Online dating is terrible for single men. You are assuming our experience is with actual people, real life flesh and blood women. It's not, these dating websites target us with so many fakes, scams, and bots that many men have a negative opinion of online dating apps.

MCheetah · Answer

Nah! Women are too shallow and fickle for that! 'Can't put all your eggs in one basket' and sh*t! Gotta have a plan B, C, D, E, and F! In online dating, of course. Once it's in real life, that's a different story!

Anonymous · Answer

In general it's absolutely INSANE for any guy to stop sourcing women to date until he's IN A COMMITTED RELATIONSHIP. If you're not explicitly talking about being exclusive then you should be working to source more dates REGARDLESS of how you're meeting girls. This would be even MORE true for online where you swipe on all KINDS of different girls.

Jamie05rhs · Answer

I used to. But then an older female friend told me not to do that anymore. She said not to put all of my eggs in one basket. So after that I changed my approach.

Anonymous · Answer

Women can get any guy they want. For the vast majority of men it’s a numbers game unless you look like Brad Pitt. We might swipe right 100 times to match with 3 girls and only go on 1 date. We can’t afford to only focus on one because if nothing comes of it then we have to start from scratch.

spartan55 · Answer

Some do, some don't... every guy is different. Your perception of how attractive he is has nothing to do it.

DynamicKicker · Answer

Yes personally I only talk to one woman because I feel wrong if I'm giving multiple women my attention when I like a specific person

Pyrofox · Answer

I'd say its 2-3 till one of them is the first to like pull the trigger on wanting to meet up irl.

Anonymous · Answer

Women are much more likely to flake out when it comes meeting a guy online. So it’s best to keep talking to people until we find someone legitimate.

Anonymous · Answer

Dating is about not putting all of your eggs in one basket until you find someone where there's genuine chemistry and a connection between you.

Don't feel bad for talking to other guys because men talk to other women too.

msc545 · Answer

Men get ghosted a lot on online dating apps so having several women to talk to is a good idea when one abandons you for a better, taller, richer guy.

ThatCanucker · Answer

In online dating men are lucky if we can even get one woman to be interested in us. Thered always more men then women on dating apps so competition of brutal.

FilmGuy93 · Answer

Some men do, most don't. There's not really any need to.

Anonymous · Answer

I was messaging with 10 at once one time until I narrowed it down to 3, then 2 that I was in love with. I'm not tall either, I don't need it.

Anonymous · Answer

3:06 / 3:21+ ish.

LiamJHayden · Answer

Whether online or in real life I cast a wide net. Once I verbally commit, I am only with her, but until then I am seeking.

kramchancel · Answer

Nahh. Seriously most men get so little hits its not even funny

Anonymous · Answer

If you do it, why does it matter? It really depends on the guy. Most guys don't have it like that to get attention of 2 women at the same time.

AmeerX · Answer

I don't talk to other girls whenever I was trying to get a girl.

LegendaryDater · Answer

It's a buffet of women I think they are going for all the fixings over there on Bumble.

Anonymous · Answer

If the guy isn't obviously attractive, you are likely the only one who is talking to him.

Danny_dan92 · Answer

Women don’t focus on one man at a time. So.. no

Likes2drive · Answer

Yeah I do

Guys, When it comes to online dating, do men focus on one woman at a time?

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Guys, When it comes to online dating, do men focus on one woman at a time?

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