How do I restart a good thing and great conversation with someone on line that died out because of the holidays?

[Anonymous]

Over 2 weeks ago I met the most amazing woman online, but unfortunately we live 3 hours apart. Things were going great and we were talking 4-8 hours a day minimum, moved off the site onto Facebook messenger and WhatsApp and even exchanged some videos and pics. As well we have planned to meet up in a couple weeks when our schedules align at a hotel which has been booked for some fun. Anyways. Christmas hits and she goes silent. There are a couple messages from her like Merry Christmas, thanks for the photo, have a safe flight. But really not a lot. Last message I received was on Christmas Day saying “Merry Christmas 🎅.” Followed by “I am not one to talk all day everyday if you haven’t noticed 😂” … anyways how do I get her talking again like we were? Haven’t heard a peep since Christmas day. So I don’t know what to do next. I have never connected with someone this fast and she even told me when we spoke last that she was talking to her bestie about me. Also she hasn’t been on the dating app since she checked my profile out on Christmas eve and before going radio silent seemed like she was really into me… please help. I don’t want to screw this up! She is the best thing that has come into my life since becoming single in June. TBH I really saw this going somewhere and like I said I even have dinner reservations and a hotel booked half way in between because we want to meet face to face and with kids don’t want them to meet until we are ready. Like I said I really like this one and would move mountains to have a shot at making this work and think it truly would. She too said she has never talked to someone like this and was completely caught off guard. Perhaps I tripped her up and she wasn’t expecting this either and is testing me. I wish I knew exactly what to say to get her back to the table to start talking again. Please help if you can. Cheers!

[WindAtMyBack]

I have been through it before, when it comes on strong and you instantly talk for many hours a day.

But that's a lot of time to expect someone to take out of their day. It might be enjoyable, but it can be too much. Both of you have a life and shouldn't spend every waking moment talking to each other online.

I don't know what happened with this woman over the holidays. Maybe she will continue talking to you, maybe at a slower pace. Or maybe the time away gave her a chance to look at it more objectively and she decide to pull back.

These kind of fast and furious heated online romances are not healthy to continue at that pace. You can't be objective when you are that involved. Slowing down is important to really know the other person, and see things objectively. You just can't continue at the 4-8 hour day pace. It's not good for either of you.

[DoctorSex]

The reason why it's hard is because you aren't using social media dating for the right reasons.

Social media dating should be used to arrange meet ups strictly, you can find out so much about a person and have some great conversations when the conversation revolves around meeting up.
Otherwise what other reason are you talking for?
And how, as a man, are you positioning yourself in the mind of a woman you like if all you want to do is pointlessly and aimlessly chat?
A recipe for disaster.

Kind regards,
DoctorSex

[Anonymous]

The length of your question tells me it's probably not going to work out.

[Asker]

As I said to another member I have been out of the dating world for 20 years and this is my first time with online dating.

[Guy13]

Reach out Merry Christmas and "I want to end the old year on a good note and go into the New Year with a bang." For free !! MHO, maybe? ;-)

[Iron_Man]

That’s weird the holidays are supposed to bring you closer just pick up the phone and date her

[KathrynTaylor]

Ask her what she wants.

[Asker]

Sorry I have been out of the dating world since my early 20’s. Going through a divorce right now and am finally emotionally ready to date. Just so out of the loop. Online dating to me is new. I mean I met my ex wife organically. I have no idea what I am doing. I have met a few women since being served divorce papers but not one was like this one or even captivated my interest the same way.

[KathrynTaylor]

What have you got to lose from trying?

[Asker]

I don’t even know what to say.

[KathrynTaylor]

Well, tell her what you’ve told me. That you’re going through a divorce and feel that you need to move slowly in getting into a serious relationship, but you want her to know that you really like her and are interested in getting to know her better, if she’s ok with that.