Part of it, (and only part) is that you want one so very badly, and are trying so very hard to find someone to make your boyfriend.
That legitimately makes it harder to find one. You end up 'trying' all kinds of guys who aren't right (even if that's just chatting online for a few days) but you're trying anyone and everyone who might maybe possibly be a fit for a boyfriend. In doing so... it's no wonder you end up with a string of guys who "didn't seem to work out." Most of them were probably never going to work out. ANd the only reason you "tried" them in the first place... wasn't because you liked something about them so much (not in particular anyway)... but because you thought they might perhaps fit into the "boyfriend" slot. You are mostly concerned with getting that spot-filled... not looking closely enough at WHO you try to fill that spot with... because you just want that spot filled by SOMEBODY.
Now, I'm not trying to say that's the only thing going on here. But it is certainly a factor. It has to be. Just based on your posts over time. I cannot imagine you're only talking to or dating the guys you really like.
That's hard, I know... because that means you need to be pickier meaning... there are less potential guys to fill that boyfreind slot. You might not find a single one on the whole dating platform. Not one who you ACTUALLY like or who ACTUALLY interests you. Those are going to be fairly rare. But starting to message guys who AREN'T all that interesting to you... just because... you need a boyfriend and this is evidently who you have to take your pick from.
You don't need a boyfriend. Not unless a guy who you actually like comes along.
I understand wanting a boyfriend. I totally do. That's normal and natural and fine.
But you are forcing it. Or trying to force it.
You can't just decide you want a boyfriend and end up finding a boyfriend who is actually a good fit for you. Because what are the odds that the guy who is a perfect fit... is any more likely to come your way just because you want a boyfriend? They are the same odds as they would be, if you WEREN'T trying so hard to get a boyfriend.
You DO need to "put yourself out there", at least enough that single guys can find you and know you're single as well. But I think you would honestly benefit a whole lot, if you didn't focus so hard on finding a boyfriend. Focus on finding the right guy. Then, hopefully... that guy might end up becoming your boyfriend. Stop looking for a boyfriend. Look for the right guy for you. (They are very different things to be looking for)
What are the decent suitable guys you’re aiming for?
It’s important to know what THEY are looking and see if you’re a good fit.
A lot of times people have an idea of what they want in an ideal partner, but don’t spend enough time thinking about what their ideal partner would feel attracted to.
If you aren’t what your ideal partner is looking for, then your success rate is going to plummet.
If you ARE what your ideal partner is looking for (and you have some way to display it), then your success rate will be much higher.
They will just need to find you somehow.
I wouldn't show body pictures (I don't know if you do) dress a little conservative? (Again I don't know how you dress) also when you have High self esteem and know your worth truly. A good man will sniff you out. A strong good man with morals will know when they see one.
Times have changed. Why should a guy buy a cow, when he can get the milk for free?
Opinion
45Opinion
I think there could be many reasons.
The problem could be that either you´re reputation is broken in a way that some guys don´t consider you worth dating and you therefore only attract guys that are looking for fun but nothing with a future. Because it could be that if you´re known for having changed partners quickly in the past, a guy that´s looking for a partner to have a family might avoid you. The other option I see is that your expectations and the backage of your past are a hinderance that put you under pressure and make dating and getting to know a guy harder for you because of your past with dating you have a hard time trusting a guy and falling in a love with him. Or it could be that your spectrum of guys is too narrow that there are just a handful of them and none of them is interested in you.
But there could be other reasons as well.
I think maybe it's the type you are attracted too, do all your previous boyfriends have a similar attitude or way of living etc. If they all have something in common then that's a way to tell if maybe it's that, if that's the problem then change it up a bit, go on a date with an opposite, see if it ends the same way, this is all I can inform you with because if the reason is you, I wouldn't be able to tell you what the problem is cause I don't know you.
I don’t think you need to change who you are or anything. It can take patience these days to find the right match. It helps if you spot red flags quickly so you don’t waste time on dead ends. I think you need to be cognizant of the difference between cockiness and confidence. That has come up in previous posts. Cocky guys are often compensating for insecurity or something they lack. I don’t know if your standards on appearances are realistic or not. Perhaps you can get the opinion of some people you trust. If that’s an issue, if you lighten up on your standards for physical appearance just a little bit and tighten up your standards for behavior, it might put a whole lot of good men in the running.
Maybe it is just a general lack of decent guys. I see it here, where I experience a general lack of "relationship material" girls. Most seem to want to hook up and party. That was fine when I was in my late teens, but I prefer something far more substantial now.
You either have shit taste in men, or you just have no class or charm to attract the decent blokes.
I had a friend like that. She dated (usually for a week) tatted Jewish guys. They would fuck her raw, but she couldn't keep up with their sexual appetites. They would call her "boring" and ditch her. Now, this was no trailer trash lass. She was smart and owned a few properties and businesses.
But she was the "I just need some dick now and then" type. Now, a girl with money and a lax attitude to sex isn't going to have any decent taste or time for smart guys.
Don't go to the club to find guys. Good quality guys don't go to the club, if they do, they're just there to spend some time with guy friends and typically glad to get away from that scene as soon as possible.
Join a mixed team sport, or help out at a charity that you like. You have to think outside the box.
I don't know you but I do know good women get snatched up left, right, and centre. They never stay single for long. If you're perpetually on the market then the problem is not them, it's you.
You're probably broken or deficient in some way.
I certainly can't explain why. I think you're very good looking nd for insomnia I was going to see if you'd like me to tell you an erotic bed time story. It might have opposite effect. I'd like even more telling you if it got you wide awake, put a wet spot in your panties, and then you could masturbate until you fell asleep. I might not have been complete altruistic since there isn't a time of day that fails to include how much my turning you on would benefit my own fevered sexual fantasies I'd love to turn you on
The harder you will try the harder things will get for you. Take it easy. And try to find a husband instead 🤠.
Just understand you love someone despite there disadvantages, not because of there advantages :)
None of us know you so we can't give you a proper reason but all the reasons given so far are very plausible. Based on the type of guy that you've said you're attracted to, you're drawn to the type that would most likely use you. If you can pull, but you're pulling jerks, then it sounds like a problem with your selection criteria. You're either not choosing or making yourself available to guys who aren't jerks.
Well we talked about it. i just think you could let up on your physical standards. And you may want to try becoming more secure for the few guys you meet that meet your standards but you get scared when it gets real.
The top men are generally going to be cocky and full of themselves. Your idea of a “decent” man is probably the kind of dude who everyone wants and who has a ton of options. Maybe lower your standards a bit, particularly in the looks department
Are you a decent suitable girl? With both men and women alike today, the problem in this regard tends to be that people have standards for their partner that they themselves can't, or don't want to live up to.
Didn't you able to get a boyfriend? but it looks like you have a problem with keeping one.
I'd have to say you're to picky or looking in the wrong places.
It's because god wants you to be with someone whom you deserve cause you're a wonderful girl 😊
Well all of that ammunition in your profile picture might be giving some guys the wrong idea.
You're probably attracted to things that blind you to warning signs that assholes give off.
You could change that
How you made a list of the qualities you're looking for in a man? Do you know what you want?
Because you have issues, so you only attract issues
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