I'm crazily jealous of women who have men who love them, I'm never chosen. Why does no man see me romantically as special or that I could be the one?

[Anonymous]

I feel a near hatred (exaggerated) for women who have men who adore them. And it’s not that the women are so perfect they’re just unconditionally loved. I’m not perfect but I try and get I’ve never been able to experience that, people may have crushes on me but never more than a “she’s kinda cute I guess.” I hate it when men adore their girlfriends and would never bat an eye anywhere else, I’d never encourage infidelity but no one would ever think I worth that type of loyalty and complete adoration.

I’m uniquely myself i worth to better myself everyday I’m generally confident but it feels like shit knowing im never gonna be loved like that. It’s not that im not pretty enough or proper enough not enough because the women who get this type of love aren’t all the most beautiful or the most kind they just get lucky, but I’m not that kind of lucky. I’m win a raffle lucky not lucky the in shit that really matter. I’m not made to be liked more than fleeting attractions even if I pour my soul into it.

does anyone feel similar or know what’s the secret receipt to being loved?

[Screenwriter]

This NEVER is a sign of catastrophizing that is unnecessary, especially at your age. You have many years ahead of you to find someone who you love and who loves you back.

If you're developing yourself and your personal skills, have broad interests/hobbies, are getting some kind of education beyond high school, you have a good chance of meeting someone with similar interests/background.

Go about your business and keep your ears pricked and your eyes open and don't worry. Meeting someone appropriate takes time.

[Asker]

I’m 18 and still In high school (about to graduate) so I’ll say I probably haven’t given myself enough time. I’ll try not to rush but I’ve seen almost everyone in high school that I’ve known had at least 1 guy completely infatuated with them. Even the less popular ones end up having a guy head over heels in love with them and when you ask they always just say he just liked her out of nowhere and his ever never stray. It’s hits kinds disappointing being the only one who never got that.

[Screenwriter]

I didn't have anyone in high school either. So stop worrying. But I met loads of nice people, some of whom I am STILL friends with today, in college and later in grad school when I was in my 50s!

Keep your heart OPEN, befriend people who have potential, be tolerant, patient and kind! I am always struck by how good people are to me! How generous. But my cousin tells me, you're the same way. I barely think of that. But it's true. What goes around comes around. You'll always meet a FEW duds. But most people are good and fun. Love will come along with the good and fun. You're just starting. Be patient with yourself. Cultivate friends. Loves will follow.

[Anonymous]

Women choose the men and men choose whether or not marriage or relationships happen.

You are the initial selector. If you are not getting the attention you want from men its most likely the men you select are not compatible. You have to either change the type of men you approach or change the type of woman you are to be more compatible with the men you approach.

The kind of loyalty and complete adoration you see other men giving their women is an earned honor, I don't think luck is a huge part of it. guys don't just give that kind of special attention away. Kind of like if you see a woman who has a prestigious position in their career likely it's not luck its hard work that got them there.

It's hard to diagnose the hang up here but just by what you've written in the headline "I'm never chosen" seems a bit off. You are the one who chooses.

[Asker]

The guys I choose are never interested in me like I am with them if at all. It’s not like I’m going for super sought after guys either. I usually like introverted nerdy type or social creative men and they still end up not giving 2 shits about me and the times that they do they have these secret awful character flaws like being racist (I’m dead serious) on the women choose more id like to say the women I usually see who are given this type of royal treatment were both chosen and pursued by the men. For example the guy sees them isnatly thinks she’s gorgeous (even if she’s more average somehow she fits his ideal) so he does all he can to be noticed by her then takes for out and does everything for her forever and ever. Which sounds like some fake ideal but I’ve seen it happen to multiple of my close friends where they just have these cute guys see them and fall in love and I’ll go out with them or whatever and you can just see how infatuated he is with her.

[Asker]

that was insanely long with no indents, sorry I just started rambling really

[Opinion Owner]

interesting, maybe the women you see this happening too have a different answer. Generally that kind of traditional ideal happens for the top 10 percent of women who are exceptionally sought after.

[Asker]

maybe it’s different cause I’m younger. Im just about to leave high school and almost ever girl I’ve know has had that kind of adoring type puppy love even the less popular type girls you know. So maybe it’s a kinda young love excitement thing

[Opinion Owner]

I didn't realize you were talking about high school lol. Anything goes in high school XD

[Asker]

I’m a senior now, about to go to college so many things will change

[Asker]

maybe*

[MementoMori777]

The secret recipe is being yourself, at some point you'll find love, it's unrealistic to want love from many because the reality is that sometimes people hide love or confuse it with other urges or feelings, so you see that they love em but they can be thinking of something else, you want real love right? Or do you want the same attention as them?

[Boomchakalaca]

I felt this way in high school. I remembered these two guys were helping this girl (who was in cheerleading) do a bridge.. and i couldnt get one guy to notice me at least.. til my senior year 😂

[Anonymous]

The women whom I've heard saying this, have nothing wrong with them. It's just bad luck. Sometimes women very attractive in every way struggle making it happen.

[Asker]

Maybe it’s just not my turn yet, soon hopefully!

[Opinion Owner]

You're 18, it sucks, but know that I'm speaking of women in mid 20s who just have standards and never had a boyfriend, despite meeting every requirement in any man's list.

[In_Trance]

you're desperate and that's the problem. Desperation is ugly.

[Asker]

I mean of course I look desperate now because I’m ranting and upset but generally I’m known for being very my own. My friends and family have always said I’m non reliant on romantic relationships and have never been the guy crazy type.