How to get over a guy who doesn’t want me back?

[Anonymous]

I went out on a date with a guy from my uni last Saturday. We both knew we found the other attractive so he took initiative after a week of meeting to ask me out. We went out and I thought the date went well. It wasn’t awkward and it was nice. He even texted me saying he had a great time. But it turns out (according to his friend) that he found the date to be very platonic even though he thought it was nice too. I can agree that there wasn’t any romance between us but I just thought it was cos of the setting: we went to a cafe and then on a walk. I know I don’t have feelings for him since I barely know him but I am still insanely attracted to him and it hurts that he doesn’t want to continue seeing me. We haven’t spoken since the date but I know nothing is going to happen between us so im not waiting for anything to happen; I don’t want a guy who doesn’t want me back. But how can I move on?

This was my first date ever as well so im not sure if I did something to mess it up during the date without realising.

But yeah, any tips as to moving on would be great

[Rosexøxø]

okay, where did you guys go...

You don't perform.. you learn and you do.

You have fun.

So do exactly the same on the next date if that's what you want.

- Go to places/events you want and always say what you want, unapologetically. Having clarity as soon as possible helps both parties, to not waste their time, nor each other's.

Be grateful you're not one of many who stay in 'toxic' and 'platonic' relationships because they don't see/ they deny/ they're afraid/ insecure/ or feel safe (in the platonic ones).

You know (sadly, not through him directly), and he knows... so now you BOTH get to move on, and find more meaningful things.

If you just want to fuck his royal hotness, then do so lol (ask/consensual). He shouldn't really have any issue, unless he was waiting for marriage or had some std.

Here's the biggest takeaway.

He said, "Nice."

Later, he SUPPOSEDLY said, platonic...

He thought you'd be flirty- and you both would end up having full-on sex, if not a make-out 'sesh,' of some sort.

That's what he means by "bo-ringgg"

because NO ONE-

gets bored, meeting or hanging with a (rather) new individual, who seems attractive on top of that- at a place that ought to be F - U - N, while receiving new information.

Was he even learning about you?

Did he NOT enjoy the location?

Yeah- he wanted something "fun" (sexually/ sexually influenced).

He doesn't take you AS seriously, but he was somewhat polite. If he doesn't make it clear about another date, or didn't mention it- that's his low point, and your sure sign to find someone who'd be more swooped by you.

Otherwise, you're both just good for the sex part, and then that's probably it, and all there is to it.

(Sorry I had to be honest. He wasn't direct. You also seem smart enough to know a bit about what's going down, but don't use your smarts to self-sabotage yourself.

Improve in life goals- measurable goals. Mature and grow, but never change the core of who you are or downplay what you like or what you ARE like, for someone or ANYONE else.

Glad you had a good time sis :)

You got the fun night, maybe. The meal, hopefully. The experience.

You move on, by enjoying your private life, and if dating is something- in general- that you want, then try dating others. ;-; That's clearly the way to do it.

Don't get sentimental or give your best emotions for this fly-by-night- guy.

Best to you sis! <3

[Anonymous]

You dodged a bullet, he just wanted sex probably. No serious guy would find a date with a beautiful girl "too platonic" to not go further, it just means that from him majestic point of view you didn't put out enough by throwing yourself at him, so he wants some girl who will do that while he doesn't have to do anything just exist. If he is attractive he is probably spoiled and feels entitled. Doesn't mean he is an ass or not capable of relationship, but for guys like him sex is the one and only outcome from dates, the other things may or may not come he is not even thinking about that right now, he is young.

[Opinion Owner]

And the fact that for him it was "too platonic and boring" means he just sucks at doing whatever he's trying to achieve, it has nothing to do with you. He wants to play a macho guy hoping his looks and your interest will be enough to get you to bed, because he knows he lacks social (and probably many other) skills. It is a pure reflection on him and how much he sucks, and he knows it trust me.

[Opinion Owner]

I bet he also has a very nice personality, watch out for those! The fake nice guys, literally nothing worse then those.

[WanderingLoveWizard]

Who said she's beautiful?

[jujus]

Just have to find it in you to accept it and move on just like I’ve had to do it feels bad but it’s better for you

[OlderAndWiser]

Did the guy try to hold your hand or kiss you during the date?

[jennifer_bloom]

My thought is that if the guy is meant for you and you lose him, you will have no trouble finding a replacement. If you can't replace him, you are probably punching above your level.

[Poliker]

The best way to forget a guy is to get another one. On a more serious note, try to focus on other activities that make you happy. And try not to have limerence. It is basically fanaticizing about the relationship before the first date happens. It leaves you feeling a sense of longing for something that never existed. I am sorry that this happened to you.

[ThelmaRae]

Yeah. it happens. He seems like a great guy. Some people just aren’t meant to be. But it’s normal to feel grief. It’s nothing wrong with you and nothing wrong with him… other then he should have been more honest

[itsalyssaagain]

Self esteem babe. Not everyone is gonna like you and you can’t control how people will treat you. But your self esteem has to be high enough so that it doesn’t affect you.

[Christoff92]

Take some techniques on breathing which many yoga classes are making available 😊

[shades777]

You can't

[In_Trance]

Find someone else