Girls always complain they can't find good men but when they get a good guy they threat him like shit?
Honestly I feel that a lot of woman just wanne be treated like shit because obviously that's what they are attracted to
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+1 y
My apologies for generelising. Please understand that my question is about certain woman that are like that, but ofcourse not all woman are like that. There are plenty of good woman out there and I didn't mean to put you all in the same categorie. Sorry if I hurt your feelings with it.
Why do woman threat good men who are nice, kind and respectful like shit?
What I learned from my own personal experiences and what I have witnessed with girls , is most girls’ want a good and bad guy period. For a guy to keep a girls’ interest , he has to be a little bit of both , he can’t be too nice and he can’t be too bad , he pretty much has to balance in between that , for her to want to come into his arms , he basically has to stand his ground and make it clear to her that he won’t chase her if she chooses to walk away Most girls use manipulative tactics to string a guy in and most Girls’s are selfish people that really only care about themselves and most girls’ are very vulnerable , they are mostly attracted to a guy for his status or his masculine energy and the way he presents himself. But Girl’s usually want opposite of what they already have right in front of them , If she is with a guy that is too nice that kisses her ass , she will eventually get bored and latch onto a guy that doesn’t kiss her ass , if she is with a guy that treats her like shit , she will more than likely latch on to a guy that is nice to her that doesn’t treat her like shit , Most girls are not innocent period , she can grow up as a sweet innocent caring girl but she also has a wild side waiting to unleash, Girls are usually easily redirected by their toxic girlfriends, friends that fill her head that all guys are assholes and cheaters , if her girlfriend doesn’t like you , she is more than likely going to take her girlfriends side over taking yours and make your life a living hell if you don’t put an end to it , Girls want a many she can look up to that she feels safe and secure that keeps her in line , Most girls’ will not cheat on a guy that tolerates her shit and acts like he I’ll be ok without her , a girl wants to be the chaser period , you have to remember girls have shark week once a month her hormones are all out of wack and she will take that shot out on you , throw her ass a candy bar and hide and wait for her to come to you , if she doesn’t come to you she is going to someone else , kick her to the curb where she belongs
You have to understand something girls do not like nice guys because they think that they are weak they think just because they're kind they're pushover It's usually the nice guys that are very quiet the nice guys can be just as badass as a badass and they usually are
I'm a nice guy and I've been treated like that all my life but the best part about it is I don't look at it like that I look at it like they're trying to tell me they're not the right ones for me because they want me to be something different even though I am that person down deep in my subconscious but I choose not to be I choose to be the nice guy if somebody wants to bring out the badass bring it out it's cool
At the same time I respect myself I respect other people I don't need to prove who I can be or who I am until somebody brings it out of me and that's even hard to do sometimes
But the girls that go that way they end up losing anyway because they find the badass guys that they like me he ends up abusing her beating her up changes her destiny and what she needed to understand was that nice guy that cared it was super nice if there ever came down a moment where you needed to get away from the badass that nice guy could probably just make it happen
Yeah don't let people like that affect you because you got to look at the bigger picture they're in your life to tell you that's not the type of girl you want because she's going to end up being trouble anyway anytime anything happens bad you look at the bigger picture it's a warning they're telling you down deep you're telling you in their subconscious that they are wrong for you
Same thing for the girls if a guy does something she does not like or approve of he's doing it unconsciously but he's telling her in a roundabout way that he is the wrong person to walk away we have been programmed to fill and see things in a different light when we argue are we fight he's meaning he's this he's that no he's a jackass and he's trying to warn you that he is the wrong person for you same with a girl she's trying to warn you that she is the wrong person for you walk away there's 50 other billion women and men out there don't get stuck with somebody you think you like you have to find the person that you know you like and that likes you the same way
Often the nice guys is not so nice, they often feel entitled to girl love just being they'r nice, but if you're just nice and have nothing in common with the girl is gonna get bored and is gonna leave (often ghosting this days). And then the "nice" guys will lose his shit and become aggressive this is not being a nice guys.
Also maybe the girl the guy is interested in is just not interested in him but don't say anything at first cause he's nice and she doesn't want to hurt him (or think they can be just friends). Usually if the guy is more into the girl than the reverse then it's doomed to fail.
There's also people who don't like being treated nice cause they weren't treated well by their family and have issue with being love / treated with respect, it depend on the person.
Yeah. I didn't wanna come off as an asshole, but I'm one of those guys. I mean, I love being nice to girls I like, but I do have more respect for girls who are tough and have a little bit of attitude and especially controversial views. Though I don't like when that attitude is directed towards ME🤣
I think men that treat women like shit say that to justify treating women like shit (kinda like the guys that lie to women and say it’s cuz women like being lied to🙄🤦🏼♀️) Tell you what, my first husband treated me like shit (why he’s my EX husband) my second was a good man and great father (why we were together 20 years till he passed away) I wish people would quit it with these blanket statements like they apply to all women or all men when it would be so much better for everyone to treat people by their individual personality or character traits🤷♀️🤦🏼♀️
The reason they do it the same reason we treat girls we don't like less than. You've done it in your younger years at least once and you know it.
The reason is most people are ignorant to what attraction really is. And they are ignorant to who people are. They don't even understand themselves. Most don't. In fact, you probably won't run into someone who does for months.
Attraction is mostly or almost entirely based on the subconscious. And no I'm not saying girls like bad guys. The same reason you go back to porn The same reason you go back to smoking The same reason you go back to over indulging in sex Is the same reason girls pick bad guys and it is also the same reason they pick good guys. Good guys are less frequent because mass consciousness doesn't turn people into good people. Look at how to have to act to fit in... People want sex so bad + they haven't figured out how to get it without violating others. + mass consciousness programming them to be bad.
The truth is we all need to be disciplined about treating everyone like they are someone we care about. We need to stop reacting to the world and be disciplined in our intention and actions. I don't believe in morals. But I hate the ego and largely the problem with the world is ego and ignorance.
You cannot think of people, subconsciously, as less than and think society is going to be fair and heavenly. We are all equal and there is an awareness behind that statement. It isn't just fluff. I'm not saying are results are equal or the same.
Good men just need to step up their shit. World isn't roses and candy. It's backwards and there is negative forces present. We can cry about it or step up and drop the ego games. Accept we aren't enough and work to get better.
I can tell you from my own bitter experience, because I lost a great girl whom I loved very much because of this. It was over fifty years ago, but she's one of those I still think about. Sometimes, if a girl has poor self-esteem, she may feel that if SHE's not worth much, then any guy who could want her, who could love her, can't be worth anything, either! So if you treat her respectfully, and you try to please her, she can reach a point where she feels, "DON'T BE SO GOOD TO ME!" My ex told me, when she was breaking up with me, "I want to be put in my place!" I asked her, "Should I have done that?" She said, "YES! It might have helped!" I said, "Should I do it now?" She said, "I don't know."
So there it was. I thought, "Great, NOW she tells me!" I should have asked her, "What lesson am I supposed to take from this? Never be too nice to a girl, because she won't appreciate it, she'll just think you're a wimp and she'll disrespect you"? I wish I'd asked that.
The other side of the coin is, she may feel, "If I let this guy get too close to me, he'll find out what I'm REALLY like and he won't want me and he'll dump me, so I'd better dump him first!" That's REAL poor self-esteem! A girl like this may have had issues growing up with her father. She really needs some deep therapy which you can't give her.
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Anonymous
(45 Plus)
+1 y
In the most extreme cases these women simply are not good women. They typically do not have very good values and simply do not know HOW to have a healthy interaction with the opposite gender.
In all other cases when we meet somebody believe it or not we TEACH them how to treat us. This is why I can't stress enough it's important for a guy to know is value before getting into a relationship (women as well). Some women even if she doesn't realize she's doing it will interpret niceness for softness. Women, ESPECIALLY immature women under 25 (sometimes all the way to 30) are particularly bad at this. Immature women simply do not know how to respect the differences opposite gender if they grew up with poor male role models. Some correct this behaviour over time and some do not. As I say, this is why I will tell any guy who will listen. Always remember you're the man. You are the more logical of the two. Never tolerate disrespect from a woman and always be mindful she is heavily influenced by emotions. It's a definite balancing act. But you must always demand a base form of respect from her. If she doesn't want to give that you always have to be ok with telling her to hit the road. In a healthy relationship where a woman respects you it'll seldom to almost never come to this.
I don't know what nice you mean but I will give you my opinion as a person who considers herself an alpha. I love me a dominant man; and I don't mean the sexual things. But a man who has a vision of where he is taking us. Because that's the kind of man I want to submit to. When a man puts on my shoes and I wear his, then you're sure to find very minimal respect as most men seek. Because she is the leader and she is leading how she knows to lead. So that kind of man can be all kind, nice and respectful as he much as he wants but if he lets the woman take on his responsibility, he will be treated like shit.
Thanks appreciate your answer. It's very helpfull. I know that when I was young I really didn't give a shit about other peoples feelings and emotions because of drugs abuse and still regret my actions to this day altough is has been 15 years ago already. I think I maybe over killing being nice to make up for the things I did in the past which isn't attractive for woman at all probably. I should try to find the half way point of being dominant again. Because I realise I was way to dominant in the past and maybe Im not dominant enough anymore because of my feelings of guilt 🤔 Definitely something to think about that for sure. Thanks for the guidance❤️
It all comes down to attention. Some nice guys think that only if they could be assholes then everything would magically turn around for them.
What these guys don’t get (because nobody teaches young boys this unfortunately) is while most women don’t like being mistreated they really want mystery and challenge.
It’s easier said then done but try treating women you are attracted to no differently and no better then ones you don’t feel attracted to. Not worse not better just same.
“You do everything right when you have low interest level.”
My answer is based on observation. I do not claim to know the inner thoughts of women. I can only go by their actions and my experiences: Women don't respect guys who put the woman above himself. Even if she has fantasies and enjoys the idea of having a guy who does that. If you talk to an honest* woman about Romantic Comedies she will say that the love struck guys in the movies are idiots/pu**sies/suckers but simultaneously that 'ahh, it's so nice how he treats her'. If you want to be a man you can not also be everything women say they want. All you really need to be is who a man should be. This is not determined by women!
*=These women will only be honest with dudes who already know the truth. The rest of you are the suckers they laugh at.
I'm not saying you have to treat a woman poorly tho. Some people just are NOT compatible. If you don't push her buttons by being you then you're not a good match. Don't try to force stuff.
And... a lot of guys are drawn to women who just are not compatible and if those women are more aware of it than the guy then he will come off feeling like he's being treated unfairly when the reality is that it's like a guy covered in honey jumping on a beehive. When you realize 90-99% of women on earth all look the same naked, you can stop being hypnotized by how some of them dress and focus more on character stuff which helps you avoid incompatibility.
I think for the same reasons some guys say they want loyal and caring women and then go for the bad girls. It´s easier from a guy´s point of view what guy is a good partner and who isn´t. I think a guy has an easier time figuring out if a guy is nice and respectful because he has a good heart or because he wants sex. Since he has it easier to understand the guy´s action and sublimely speaking. So I would say those women make a wrong assumption about the guy they treat bad since they might see him as someone who´s not honest.
There could be a lot of reasons. Often guys who say they are nice aren't, and sometimes they think they are, but their expectations are too high. I have one friend who says he can never get a girlfriend and he is a nice guy, but he expects too much from a girl. He wants a girl with a tight ass, who will let him have anal sex with her, a blonde or a redhead, he's too specific.
Another reason, girls don't respect nice guys because to them, nice guys are week. They don't admit but actions speak! I used to buy girls flowers, take them to dinner, and whisper sweet nothings in their ear, but they don't want that.
It's best just to treat them like you would a friend, a good friend that is, and you will get more respect. Why are girls like this? I have no clue!
this has been answered 100 times out here, maybe search on the answer.
you need to understand women better... where they are coming from emotionally, you need to up your confidence to be your best man. that solves the problems...
Think of it as the animal kingdom... watch wolves. A lone weaker male approaches a pack of females and what happens? They kill and eat him! He has to be strong enough (in character and such), else the females destroy you and submit to the stronger. There's reasons for that...
If you don't like that, then go find some devoutly religious women whom are functioning less as animals.
Girls don't respect nice guys but they do respect asshole arrogance. It seems a necessary component that girls feel respect for the guy. If he gives reason for them to lose respect for him, they will be out the door before long. There is no real equivalent on the male side.
I think it goes back to the 2 Million BC brain. No emergency services back then. Females depended on males for safety and the arrogant asshole ticks that box better than a nice guy. If the nice guy will take her female shit without him physically chastising her she could barely rely on him could she?
Everyone keeps forgetting one part— we want a good person who is nice, kind, respectful AND CUTE. If that physical attraction is lacking, the man/woman is settling (and just claiming they didn't want to be shallow) OR you’re likely getting friendzoned
Based off your profile pic, you are attractive but need to smile to look more friendly. Now of course thats my opinion. Beauty is subjective. The girls you are into may not be into you in return
Also, just because a person may not be attractive to someone is not an excuse for people to treat them like crap. That in general is common these days but still rude and unacceptable. I’m sorry you were treated as such and have had such negative experiences. But you can't let a few bad apples spoil the whole bunch
Ahhw you are so sweet 🥰 Thank you for your kind words! I know there are many great woman out there. My choices are probably the problem 😅 Thanks for the compliments, I really appreciate that! 🥰
Make a list of physical/personality traits regarding these women who turned you down in the past. Figure out what it is they all had in common and then try to avoid that in search of your next target
Thanks for the tips. Im starting to realise that I'm the problem myself. Im attracted to the girls that don't match my personality. For some reason I'm attracted to woman which I can't see myself be long term with if im honest to myself 🤔 I will try to figure out what you just told me, it might help me getting a better understanding of myself and my mistakes in trying to find love
Nobody is perfect right? But taking a look in the mirror is a skillset that not everyone possess so the fact that you do understand this is telling me you are very mature and wise woman ❤️ 💪
I didn't mean to generelise my apologies if it felt that way. I know there are many good woman out there aswell. I should change the question a little bit 😇
No, because we want the good guy to be like the bad a little and have some balance. The extreme of one thing is never good. Either the bad is too bad or too good too good. Why can't there ever be a balance in things? The perfect guy as I see it has a balance
You're going after the wrong chicks. I know plenty of females who are in long, healthy relationships with genuinely good guys, or looking for one to be with and mean it. You just gotta find the right type of woman
Why do men do the same thing? Kind people need stop feeling bad about giving people a taste of their own medicine. Also, good people need to stop believing they can save people. Good people need to stop giving chances. If someone needs another chance, they usually don't deserve it. Pretty much never.
How do know it's harmlessly to them? Because it sounds like you are playing with their feelings of you say it like this. How do you know you are not hurting them on the inside?🤔
Probably because most of us are just simps who want to kiss their asses. When someone kisses your ass, your natural reaction, in most cases, is going to be to treat them like shit, and as strange as it may sound, I actually prefer that.
1. The guys think "being nice" entitles them to sex. 2. The guys are nice, but also weak. 3. The girls might want a challenge and do not see them as such.,
#1 is a good point. #2 It takes a lot to call someone weak. I wouldn't call someone weak just because they’re maybe shy or submissive. Weak to me wouldve been if they have ONS instead of forming relationships. #3 If I wanted a challenge, I’d play them in a game/sport lol. Maybe you can elaborate on that one. I’m not asking a guy to chase me and I’m not looking to chase him. I just want to be mature and state if we’re into eachother, otherwise move on. #4 (Not listed but I’ll add this one and personally replace your #2/3 with it) He simple was not physically attractive. To me, both looks and personality are important. Im sure many will agree/disagree but I just had to come and further detail your possible reasons lol
Some women and men enter abusive relationships because they were abused or neglected in childhood. They are leery of people who treat them well. I've been there.
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Anonymous
(18-24)
+1 y
It could be the way you look. If I saw you i'd keep my distance... you look scary. But you have attractive features you just look really really tall and have a serious face on with a chain around your neck...
Looks can be very deceiving! I'm actually pretty friendly and woman have absolutely nothing to fear from me. I won't harres you, I won't touch you inappropriatly and I also won't bother you when I come across you in the street. I even will protect if necessary so altough I might look scary to you... I'm very friendly and you have nothing to fear 😇
It's good to have some kind of fear towards taller men because sadly not all men have the amount respect for woman as I do. Their are men out there who are willing to hurt woman or sexually abuse woman for their own sexual gradification so being cautious is definitely Something I recommend all woman to be towards men. Personally I have been in multiple situations where other guys tried to take advantage of me or tried to intimate me in a way that I felt blessed being a guy and not a girl in those moments. They failed to achieve their goals because I know how to defend myself and therefore they couldn't take advantage of me because I could let them know they were fucking with the wrong guy but I hated to be a woman in those situations. Some men are truly disgusting so keep your guard up at all times is what I would advise you to do 🤗
You don't have to thank me because it's natural thing for me to do. I hate men who don't respect woman and I'm willing to teach them this lesson even when it requires me to use violence in order to teach them.
But I do appreciate you for it so thank you for your kindness and appreciation❤️
It's because society labels them as "weak men". The whole definition of a "manly man" is roughneck, super dominant, and disrespectful. However, the men that you describe are considered sissy, femboy, or overall weak.
Most guys who say they are a nice guy are not a nice guy. If you’re only being nice because you want to get laid it is way. creepier than a guy who is an asshole
The asker is talking about the real nice guys. Not the dudes trying to just get laid. And just because they treat one girl nice to get laid doesn't mean they aren't naturally nice in other situations. It just means they manipulated that one girl into believing they wanted more.
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