How would you react if a guy touches you on the first date?

[spice]

We were on our first date and it had only been half an hour, we didn't even get to know each other and she tried to touch me, is this normal?

[DaveJord]

Yes, it's normal. I mean as guy, if I am on a date and the woman wants to touch me... I love it!!! Trust me, I do a lot of online dating... so yeah on first date I like to brush up against them, hold a hand, or put my arm around them at least once to get a since of what type of vibe she has.

If she reacts poorly, then chances are there is no second date. If she can't even give me a good hug goodbye... that and indicator that chemistry is not there. So, I am not saying press the issue, or seriously get into her personal space, or force yourself on her... but if a little physical touch turns her off, then all the better. Best to figure that out early then later.

[StttAlways]

NO MY DEAR... THIS IS NOT** NORMAL. EXCEPT (AND UNFORTUNATELY IT IS ACTUALLY RATHER COMMON, AT LEAST AMONGST GUYS THAT HAVE NO UNDERSTANDING OF WOMEN, THE WAYS IN WHICH *THEY BOND*, OR WHAT GENERALLY ATTRACTS MOST OF THEM.. MEANING UNFORTUNATELY MANY MEN HAVE NO CLUE HOW TO ATTRACT A WOMAN B/C THEY ASSUME THAT WOMEN FORM BONDS AND ARE ATTRACTED TO THE SAME THINGS THEY ARE..(THEY"TYPICALLY" ARE NOT).. I. E,.. MANY MEN ASSUME THAT MANY WOMEN ARE INSTANTLY TURNED ON BY THE SITE OF A NAKED PENIS.. AS A WOMAN, I'M SURE YOU CAN VOUCH FOR ME WHEN I SAY THAT TYPICALLY I'M SURE YOU ARE NOT INTERESTED IN SEEING A NUDE PENIS. ESPECIALLY ONE THAT BELONGS TO SOMEONE THAT YOU DON'T KNOW PERSONALLY... (TO EVEN BEGIN TO THINK ABOUT BEING SEXUALLY ATTRACTED TO A NUDE PENIS A WOMAN HAS TO TYPICALLY HAVE ALREADY ESTABLISHED A RELATIONSHIP WITH THE MAN. MOST WOMEN AREN'T TYPICALLY INTERESTED IN SEEING A PENIS THAT BELONGS TO A MAN THAT THEY DO NOT KNOW OR HAVE NOT DEVELOPED A RELATIONSHIP WITH ALREADY. YOU SEE MEN ASSUME MISTAKENLY OF COURSE THAT WOMEN ARE VISUALLY ATTRACTED LIKE THEY ARE. SO THEY ASSUME THAT WOMEN WILL BE INTERESTED IN SEEING A PHOTO OF THEIR NUDE PENIS. MOST MEN DON'T TAKE THE TIME TO GET TO KNOW AND UNDERSTAND THE INTRICACIES OF BEING A WOMAN LIKE WOMEN TYPICALLY ARE MUCH MORE INCLINED TO HAVE TO DEVELOP A RELATIONSHIP WITH MEN BEFOREHAND TO BE INTERESTED IN HIM SEXUALLY. MOST WOMEN HAVE TO FORM SOME SORT OF EMOTIONAL BOND OR CONNECTION BEFORE SEXUAL ATTRACTION KICKS IN.

[DaveJord]

I can't say I really vibe with this response. I mean you are not really wrong; I mean actually you are probably 100% correct. But most guys are looking for some type of physical contact... doesn't have to sex.

let me say this, after a first day and she can't' even give me a good hug goodbye without it being weird... yeah there's no second date.

[BasedBaeBecca]

That depends on what kind of touch it is.

A handshake or a shoulder brush is not a big deal and can be a reasonable attempt to get to know you better and break the tension.

But, touching on your legs, back, or chest can be seen as overly flirty and inappropriate on a first date, especially if you haven't even had enough time to get to know each other.

It can be hard to read people's intentions, so if you are uncomfortable with the touch, you can politely decline their advances and set a boundary.

[Twalli]

The back is borderline, but the ass, chest, and upper legs need permission or a longer relationship. Also going down the front of her pants requires permission almost 100% of the time.

[TheorionMage]

He's 'testing the waters' and YOUR tolerance---
MANY 'good girls' don't want to appear too 'forward'
and will 'tolerate' male initatory foreplay and judge his 'technique' ~
Conversely, you MISS 100% of every potential 'opportunity' you DON'T risk taking.

[AviatorTom]

An innocent touch is very normal on a first date. Something more than that is not typical, unless she lets me know that's what she wants.

[OlderAndWiser]

If you are talking about lesbian dating, I don't know anything about that. If you are talking about a guy trying to touch you, was he trying to hold your hand or your boob? Big difference!

[Pinay_ako]

How and where did he touch you?

[Reem12345reem]

if ur uncomfortable for u , show it by your facial expressions and body language and step away and make distance , if he did it again then just tell him ur annoyed

if u like it , then don't do anything or u can touch him subtly to flirt back

it all depends on the girl and the comfort between u too

for me personally light touching is okay on a first day (if I've known him before , like a friend or smthg) if he's a complete stranger then no , but then again it depends on the energy and the intention behind his touch

[provokeesmokee]

Ok, "touching me" can mean a bunch of very different things.

If it's something appropriate, like a touch of the hand or arm, that's totally fine.

If we click, a hug is totally fine on a first date. If we hardcore click, a cheek kiss is also good.

If he's fucking trying to fondle me, he's getting his arm or fingers broken or slapped. And no second date.

[Stacey55666]

It's normal in the real world, but not normal in the GAG world.

https://www.youtube.com/embed/UrGw_cOgwa8

He's not a monster, he's a man. And he found you simply irresistible. LOL

You never described the touch, so I'm gonna give him the benefit of the doubt.

If a guy never touched me on the first date, I would feel offended.

[RavVid]

I always establish physical touch as early as possible. If you don't it just defers that intimacy and is a potential problem later. I do it low key in ushering you through a door or brief finger tap in acknowledgement when you say something amusing.

However minimal it helps establish a path forward so I think it is a good thing.

[sheikalana]

She tried to touch you how? When I was single I used to hate and it used to be a huge turn off for me when the guy puts his arm/hand around my waist. I just makes me cringe till this day. I don't mind if someone touches me unintentionally cuz I might also touch unintentionally but touching my tight or my face is a No No we're not that close yet if we're just dating.

[genericname85]

if i was a girl and i did not actually want that, i'd tell him to stop. if he doesn't stop, i will push him away and leave. neither is that normal, nor is that ok behavior from a guy. if he gives it a shot and she says no, that's fair game. but when he continues after her saying stop, that's where it's problematic.

[Raaj4you]

No, I don't like it. I would only do it if she likes me, trusts me, feels comfortable with me and if she allows me to do so. I don't like forcing myself on anyone.

If she is nervous, cold and scared then I would never touch her. I would just talk to her, ☕drink coffee, eat snacks and go back.

If I try to force her then she'll start thinking that all men are same and all men are sexual predators.

[lilBigPotato]

Depends very much on what kind of touching we talk about. Assuming it's the more inappropriate way then that would only be okay after I give some clear signs that I'm interested which probably takes longer than 30 minutes

[Anonymous]

No. I wouldn't tolerate that from a woman, I don't think a woman should tolerate that from a guy. It might seem old fashioned to some. But old fashioned NEVER goes our of style if you ask me.

Now that doesn't mean I'd END the date but I'd pull away to send the message, "hey, pump the brakes". If that person respects you they will. If they don't then you have my blessing to end the date.

At least that's how I see it.

[Mehrsia]

It depends. If it made you uncomfortable rather tell the person or look at him/ -her in a way shows you do not like it. You can try to meet the person for the second times and if you do not feel comfortable and person does not respect your boundaries then call it end.

[BadApple69]

Ok l am a toucher…. Nothing inappropriate. But I like touching… like holding hands, touching an arm or upper back.
But…. First date…. Possibly too soon. First half hour definitely too soon.

[Drumlin2001]

Forget whether it's normal. If you weren't OK with it then tell them. If your comfortable then roll with it.

[BoopBoopBeep]

You're 48 years old you've never had a guy hold your hand or put his hand on your back to go through a door or whatever?

[TacosRAwesome]

There's touching and there's touching. I'd find it quite weird if no touching happens (like he's avoiding me) but if he's too touchy it's annoying.

[Twalli]

Where did he try to touch you? Some places are fine, others are not until you're more established or given permission. I can touch my girlfriend anywhere I want. We've been together long enough that it's acceptable (over 5 years).

[Smashingdoozy]

Depends what kind of touch, I would still probably be quite uncomfortable with that

[Citizenkirk]

I would point to the lady that I am with and tell him I am already taken.