What does it mean if a guy was touchy on the first date?

[Anonymous]

So, I went on a date recently with a guy a few years older than me and he was very touchy on our first date. We spent the entire night talking and then we watched a movie. Every few minutes during the movie he would lean in to kiss my neck and he even tried to touch my boobs and lift up my shirt. Now I wasn't sure where things would go next, so I would brush him away. I'm still new to this whole dating thing so I didn't know if it was normal or not, esp. for the first date?

[MrOracle]

Well, it means something that you should know already: guys are horny and want sex. It also means that this guy moves too fast for you and is probably too focused on what HE wants and not enough on what YOU want. But don't be TOO hard on him for that, because it's the man's role to initiate and move things forward, and the woman's role to put on the brakes and set the pace - and most women wouldn't want it any other way.

You also need to realize that men are in their sexual peak years between about 16 and 25, and I'm guessing he's in that age range. He's horny. He wants sex, or at least to see a hot young girl's body. That's pretty normal and not at all unusual. He just needs to learn to read feedback a little better and know when to slow down some.

Keep an eye on him, and if he continues to ignore your guidance, then dump him. Again, most women want the guy to initiate and move things forward, BUT they don't want to go TOO fast, and if a guy doesn't know how fast is too fast, he's usually going to choose to go faster rather than slower - at least until he starts getting resistance from the girl, at which point he should slow down some. Slowing down when you hit resistance means he respects you. Make sure he does.

[FMJ_Guy]

Did you like that? sounds like he is DESPERATE!! Probably someone to ditch!
But what he did made you uncomfortable, right? That is NOT right, and you should never have to be groped, or touched in ways that you don't want!!
No Gentleman would treat a lady that way!!

[Blunique]

On a first date? Dang... yeah he isn't looking for anything serious. I've read the mens replies and they say he's just being a horny guy. But to me that shows he doesn't have respect for you. Most girls don't hook up on the first date, what nerve. Unless he's been with a lot of girls who jumped the gun. He's taking his chances and taking advantage of your innocence. Ask him if sex is important to him in a relationship (If he even wants a relationship or a casual fling) and you'll get your answer. When he tells you his answer tell him yours. That will clear things up. Be prepared he may ditch you because he just wanted sex at the end of the day. If he doesn't and he continues to see you watch to make sure he doesn't pressure you because if he does that then he's a piece of shit. It's good to know intentions to avoid emotional investment so it hurts less.

[Winnie003]

It means he was planning for it to lead to sex. Be straight up and let him know your boundaries, don’t let him think you’re new at this though because he might try to take advantage of your naivety. Stay strong and upfront girl💪 He might be a nice guy who just miscalculated the situation, but just be careful💜

[markscott]

Forget him. He's not respectful of you or your body. He just wants your pussy. Kissing and touching unsolicited on the first date, is way too much. No decent guy lifts up your skirt on a first date, unless you let him know it's OK. Keep looking. Every guy likes tits, ass and pussy. But you can find a guy who likes these, but also will respect you, and treat you with kindness and respect, and who will actually care about your feelings.

[Pearlian]

He wanted to have sex and if your body language was "no." And he kept trying then he's a dick.
Little dating tips:
1: first date shouldn't be at home; that implies a hookup
2: if a guy ingored your nonverbal or vernal "no" cues than he's an asshole and don't date or hook up with him.
3: follow your instincts.

[FieroGT]

2 things: Number 1, most guys that are touchy like that are in it for the sex. Number 2; he's just a guy who sees all these youtube videos are movies are reenact this kind of stuff and they feel pressured to do it.

However in your case, you stated you would brush him away, most (99%) of the time the Number2 guy would get embarrassed and stop. I think you have a guy that's into to you simply for the sex. If you're into that, go for it. If not, reconsider.

[lernulo]

If you marked your limits and he didn't respect it, forget about him.
But I dont see anything bad with trying to kiss a girl the first date ( even to fuck with her if she wants).
There isn't anything bad with it, if he isn't forcing you of any form.
To me its a message you really like to him.
And what comes after ( the relationship) depends more of what you have talked to him and the compatibility as a pair than about if you fucked with him the first date or not.
To fuck is just funny, and a really great experience, in the worst case I expect you liked it.
Please, that of "if I fuck with him the first date he will think Im a bitch" is false.
If you are dating with him and you date another man meanwhile then its true.
But dates should be funny not oppressive and it goes for any type of forcing, force yourself to not doing it and trying to force to do it.

[Burgerboy21]

Kissing on the neck or cheek is fine, sometimes even on the lips too, maybe even making out as long as you're both okay with it.
But no, he should NOT be lifting your shirt or feeling your boobs on a first date! And you have every right to feel uncomfortable when he does that and stop him.
That's a huge red flag, and it is in your best interest to stop dating him and cut him off.

[nathanp97]

It isn't normal for a first date unless it is a hookup. If it was ment as a hookup date it is still weird, because who goes to the movies for a hookup? If it was a drive in movie theater that would be reasonable.

Anyway the key thing to remember about dating is that it doesn't matter if something is normal or not, if you don't like it or find it uncomfortable you need to say or do something. You should never half to put up with any unwanted touching.

[maddog998]

I have put myself in same spot too. Most guys are very sexual when it comes to a very attractive woman but I find if they do that on first date then they are only looking for sex, no matter how sexual they get they should be able to hold back until the woman is comfortable with him

[Tdieseler]

Oh yea... he wants sex. most morons.. both guys and girls would tell you to run. Cuz they don't know better.
I say do it. He wants sex... give it to him and see if he sticks around. other morons would tell you to hold it back so you can get the relationship, which leads to lies and complications... just get it out of the way. see if anything changes after you jump his bones. that way if you know you are headed for something real or just a fling.

[Alice2398]

He wanted to fuck. I'd find that type of behavior extremely disrespectful if it was me, you've only just met and haven't made your mind up about him yet and he's touching you in that way with out your permission in public I'd find that very uncomfortable

[wolfsrain22]

No! He is trying to get in your pants. I think you should confront him about it tell him that it makes you feel uncomfortable and if he is there just for sex not to waste your time. And since he is older he's probably hoping that you're not going to say anything to him and just keep on pushing you until he gets what he wants.

[Therisinghero12]

I think I heard something about different connection types or something like that, some people like touching and physical things, and some people like quality time, I can’t remember all of them but there’s a few more. But he could just be thirsty ya never know

[corkr900]

It means he's very touchy. If you don't like or want that, tell him so. If he doesn't stop, then that's sexual harassment and you shouldn't be dating him.
This kind of thing is often symptomatic of a deeper issue that WILL cause problems later in a relationship, even if he does stop when you ask, so be wary.

[Mua_deej]

That's not normal for a first date. Maybe some touching and kissing is normal if you're both into it, but if this guy is as persistent as you say... I'd suggest not seeing him again

[Jesslin412]

Uh call me old fashioned but we didn’t even kiss until the 3rd date.

8 months and no sex. Of course I’ve never had sex but he hasn’t tried anything either.

[v851234]

I'm older than you, and touchy acceptable for Me is me outing my hand on your arm, perhaps knee, and definitely hands, but boobs and up your skirt? Nope.

[kretch76]

If I'm really into a girl even on the first date I would be affectionate but just enough to let her know I'm attracted to her. But going for the boob in a movie theater is too much. And it's rude was he 16

[MimiHashima]

His interest lies within his crotch and getting in your pants... that’s what I’m reading from this on his actions... there’s no respect at all... not to mention it’s the first date... 😤

[proteus912]

I think that’s wrong for a first date. He shouldn’t have been touching you at all. If that were me, I would have felt so uncomfortable

[Ellie-V]

He wanted sex on the first date. It is normal behavior for untrained animals.

[Tdieseler]

untrained huh... trained by whom, if i may ask...

[apple24]

damn... lol I would have slap the hell out of him.. knee jerk reaction. sorry.

[jamie_11]

Probably just wants to hook up. I def wouldn’t go on a second date with this guy.

[Souless_Ginger]

Give the guy a chance jeeze.. He probably doesn't know how to approach a girl often because he probably hasent dated for a while. He's not like a creep or something and you didn't say he was being a perv/ creep..

[Souless_Ginger]

Oh I didn't read the whole fucking story lmfaooo dump his ass

[brigonos]

It's not uncommon, but it be frowned upon depending on one's view. If you don't feel comfortable with something just say it. If the guy keeps at without respecting your wishes it's probably best to break it off.

[serious]

It means he finds you sexually attractive for sure.

[FarinaLee]

Next! With the next guy he needs to plan an activity date outside of things you do to hand out.

[Pacha091101]

That is pretty extreme for a first date and most likely just wanted to get into your pants.

[Anonymous]

Most of the time when they try to rush things they just want sex. Maybe if you want to see him again ask him to go out rather then be at someone's house.

[Anonymous]

Its not normal at all, didn't you felt uncomfortable?

If you enjoyed and looking for someone for sex then this guy is good to go, but be careful because it is better that you know him first before talking step further, coz he can be maniac psychopath or something.

[nathalie_1995]

It doesn't sound alright to me. I wouldn't like that happening on the first date when you're still getting to know someone. A little too soon with the touching

[Anonymous]

Yeah, not normal "respectful" behavior on a first date. Ditch him.

[ChronicThinker]

He was trying to fuck you.

[NicoMTL]

Totally agree!

[infp_libra_78]

He clearly doesn't respect you. Kick him to the curb

[NhuanVan]

It best tell him to stop. Dating is not like that unless he only want to hav sex with you. You deserve better.

[Roula78]

He thinks your easy or he testing you and he gets what want and ghosts you.

[Bluedream13]

Hmmm hope u like being used lol he's clearly accustomed to easy women

[russellpearce]

He is a guy you want to stay away from tbh.
He doesn't want your company/mind, he wants your body.
Its bad to do that type of behaviour on a first date but If he kept trying even when you brushed him away.. He is likely to use your body then move on.

[oldoldold]

Lol he is so only interested in getting you naked. And was hoping you didn't know enough to say no. It's not normal no.

[Anonymous]

Oof be careful he could be a creep unless he was taught that way I have a friend who his dad is really touchy when hugging he grabs my head, grabs my hair, my neck no he isn’t a pedophile he was just taught that way

[dontgofalling]

Or 1. He's just a touchy guy type.
2. He wants to get close to you.
3. He wants to get you horny.
4. He wants to get you horny and the sleep with you.
5. He wants to get in your pants.
😉

[Pistachio0690]

It doesn't necessarily mean anything bad. It just depends if you're comfortable with it. I wouldn't let it go any further than that on a first date though. No more than kissing and a little feeling

[madman6767]

Touchy is ok, and so is sex if that's what both want to do

[Keimpe]

How did you meet? Tinder dates expect more sex. He was horny, and i am unsure if he likes you for you.

[DavidDivad]

tell him you're a good girl and can only do those things for $1000. My guess he won't try it again!

[handsomedevil_78]

It means he is a guy and horny and had you let him go past upstairs outsides you would be making an appointment at planned parenthood for an ultrasound right about now.

[dylanrhodes]

He's impatient and is more interested in the sex than the Netflix and chill.

[Tej05]

Unless you were sending some mega strong signal then no that's not generally normal

[Deneb_Cygnus]

It just means he's really into you and wants to fuck.

[Anonymous]

He wants sex nothing more nothing less or probably something more.

[uhhhdeku]

Totally not normal. Dude was trying to have a one night stand. The first date is to get to know each other.

[Deneb_Cygnus]

Depends what the people are looking for

[anametouse]

Hide yo boobs hide yo pride cause he wanna fuck that too

[Tyrantden]

You would have to ask him. It could mean a lot of different things.
Yes, he probably expected sex. But not necessarily.

[Abhishek9234]

It's not at all normal on first. He was definitely interested in having sex more than getting to know you

[Rambler221]

Nope. Not normal. He's unfortunately the kind of man who really just wants sex

[ajijjj]

That guy seems like he doesn't have respect for you or himself.

[doggy79]

That's not normal for a first date. Makes me wonder what his intentions are..

[Advensura]

It means he is not looking for anything besides sex

[Dakota1]

No he just wanted to get in your pants you shouldn't late him do that on the first date

[2025brainwave]

That he wants an intimate envounter.. one night stanf

[kkemmy]

No not really to be honest he should respect your personal boundaries!

[henrythe4th]

The guy is a perv but I am pretty sure you must have looked hot that day