Ladies, how do you feel about dating teammates?

[Anonymous]

I train bjj and there’s a girl that’s been training much longer that I’ve developed a crush on but I’ve decided I’m not going to say anything for the sake of not wanting to make things awkward. I generally lean towards avoiding dating people you have to share a space with (coworkers, classmates, etc.) and I don’t want to jeopardize the team dynamic.

It’s been a while since I’ve felt this way towards someone but I’m just a bit frustrated because I feel like I’ve always compromised my love life for everyone else and I don’t know if I’m shooting myself in the foot by suppressing my feelings. What do you think?

[jennifer_bloom]

Don't date her. Rules and procedures are more important than curiosity or romantic interest.
A bigger example of this is a married man being attracted to a single woman, just because a guy wants something, does not mean he has a right to ask for it.

[Asker]

I think that’s kind of an extreme example, right? We’re both single. Only reason I’m not acting on it because if things don’t end well it could mess up the team dynamic and most likely I’d have to leave the gym because she was there before me.

[laraWM]

Yes you can try to tell her how you feel

[Asker]

If there’s ever an appropriate time then I might mention I think she’s attractive but I don’t want people to build reputation so I’m just going to keep my mouth shut.

[laraWM]

If you don't ask out all girls I think it's fine 🙂