Why does body count matter to men so much all of a sudden?

[Anonymous]

Literally every single man I am trying to date wants to know my "body count" even before going on our first date. What is up with everyone all of a sudden?

These "men" are just straight away asking my body count in first chat itself. This is so annoying.

[Sunssong]

I've heard there are stats that say people who have a lot of sex or sex over a certain amount do worse at marriage.

If you understand conditioning that is where the problem is coming from. Sex is a powerful thing and it is dangerous to just play with it disregarding reason.

I also think people who sleep around tend to have certain personalities and other sister traits that come along with it.

I think it's more of judging a book by it's cover. However it is rooted in reason and understanding.

[Anonymous]

It's not 'all of a sudden' guy's have always chosen women who have the smallest 'body count' as women with low body counts are much more likely to bond with a partner, This has been shown by Research Studies;

https://www.theatlantic.com/health/archive/2018/10/sexual-partners-and-marital-happiness/573493/

https://www.dailymail.co.uk/femail/article-4085758/Experts-reveal-sexual-partners-ve-determine-likely-DIVORCE.html

[Apple1996]

These men are just following a trend. They think it's cool to hate on women's body counts all together. Which doesn't surprise me since men throughout history have always grouped up on ideas just to degrade and hate women even if it's for no reason. I don't have a high body count but would still be bothered if a man asked me this. There is no reason for anyone to ask personal questions like that about me especially on first dates.

[Sunssong]

I don't think I've yet reached clear thinking on this topic yet Apple. It is clear to me that it is uncourteous for them to be asking so tactlessly. However, I've yet to come to a conclusion of whether or not their desire to know is rooted in reason or not.

If I remember correctly, I've heard guys tell me about stats where women/people with a certain body count do don't as good in marriage. However, they did not tell me how the relationships were ending. That matters of course. Conditioning wise it makes a lot of sense. But at that point we're talking about lack of other traits is the direct problem. I can't find a good reason of why body count directly matters. Perhaps it is a paradigm not rooted in reason. @Apple1996 Maybe you're right. I'd need to hear from the other side though. My opinion on the topic is too under developed to actually be sound. @ChicoFromThe305 You know anything about this topic man? Is it just a passed down belief and way of thinking or is it rooted in reason?

[ChicoFromThe305]

Sexual intercourse has two functions, reproduction and it helps build a stronger bond with a lover, it is known sexual intercourse to build stronger connection within a couple and helps a healthy relationship get stronger and its a important part of a relationship, sexual intercourse was not created to have a function outside of a marriage, it was specifically designed by our highly intelligent creator to be a part of marriage, not as a hobby or for fun, or for when someone is having a rough time with their lover or a bad time at their job and they just want to have some fun, logically speaking in this manner you are using sexual intercourse as a drug basically which is how most people use it, not a scientifically known drug but the same functionality of it being used is as a drug, for relief, in a way a high body count takes away dignity, there's nothing more pure than two virgin adults bonding and using sex as a binding component in their relationship, the more people someone has had done this special bond with, the person loses a value that just simply can't be reversed, I'm honestly not saying two people that slept around can't love or have a special connection with another person but we can't just pretend like it's completely ineffective, people say the past is the past, but there's a reason why no one wants to hear of that past, because it is not normal it is not something that is normal for the design of humanity because sex was designs for being inside of marriage not outside of it, if you have two virgins fall in love and grow their bond through sexual intercourse then that couple has one of the highest chances of success, knowing their partner has a sexual past effects the other mentally weither they realize it themselves or not, anyone that has a body count, speak to your lover about it and trust me their mental state will change.

[ChicoFromThe305]

it's not even about jealousy or insecurity or any of those excuses people use, it just messes with the natural design of a human couple, there is a reason why the majority of humanity grows a form of anger towards the idea of body count and thats because humanity isn't wired to be sleeping around, and the more humanity evolves the more people will be against it because we have evolved from the barbaric ways of reproduction, we aren't animals, never were, we have a different wiring than animals.

[Apple1996]

@ChicoFromThe305 yess all that is correct but the main issue I see is men that aren't virgins wanting virgins women because to them its some sort of game/fetish type of thing. Two virgins is fine to ask each other this but much later on like not the first date type of question

[ChicoFromThe305]

Well yea I'm aware of that, thats why guys like me are struggling completely in finding a proper woman for marriage and that's why women with the same mindset are struggling to find a proper man for marriage, social media and idols have ruin society, everyone is being easily manipulated by toxic influences and its corrupting the minds for people, music industry has the biggest influence and these artists are promoting the wrong things, one of the most trending genres is rap and rap has ruined minds, they convinced the youth to think guns, drugs and "fucking hoes" is cool, so now you got all the idiots clout chasing and doing all this shit, you already know if they can influence the kids they have control of the generations to come.

[jahaims]

There are reasons to ask those questions with a potential partner. It tells you about their morals, values, and trauma. I do agree those aren't first date questions, though.

[Apple1996]

@jahaims it just seems like a weird thing to ask. My husband didn't even know he was taking my virginity till we were about to do it and I brought up that it was my first time. He had just assumed my exes had sex with me 😂

[jahaims]

What is weird about it? It gives you a lot of information about what kind of person they are when you are trying to see if your morals and values align, which is important for a healthy relationship. by the way I feel the same way about males. I don't have a double standard with this. I know you didn't make that accusation, but I want to clear on that. I would appreciate you articulating why it is "weird." I enjoy understanding others' perspectives.

[Apple1996]

@jahaims it's weird cause it's personal information so unless that person brings it up themselves then it shouldn't be talked about like a casual question

[jahaims]

You don't believe personal information should be exchanged when developing a romantic relationship? I agreed with you on the casual question part. I said it wasn't a first date kind of question as well. So, if it is asked after a romantic relationship is established, why would it bother you?

[Apple1996]

@jahaims even into a relationship it's still personal information to be asking. Unless the person wants to bring it up then it shouldn't be talked about. Forcing information out of a person like that isn't healthy

[jahaims]

Asking a question isn't forceful. We can agree to disagree on that one, I suppose. I believe that once in a relationship, you should be able to share anything or it isn't healthy. The only reason a person would be uncomfortable answering that question would be shame/embarrassment. What is unhealthy about asking for personal information in a relationship? I hope you know I am coming from a place of curiosity. I am not trying to convince you of anything.

[Apple1996]

@jahaims a couple should be able to share things with eachother that they feel comfortable sharing. And I don't think it has anything to do with embarrassment/shame. Like I said my body count is low but If someone asked me this I wouldn't answer.(obviously on GaG is different I'll share here cause it's basically anonymous)

[jahaims]

What makes you not want to answer then? If your answer is that it is personal information, then what makes you not want to share personal information with your partner?

[Apple1996]

@jahaims because I don't see a valuable reason to share that info unless it's necessary. Obviously my husband taking my virginity it was important to share that so he could be gentle. After the 1st time I don't see much of a reason to share unless I want to

[jahaims]

But there is no negative in sharing informative.

[Apple1996]

@jahaims sharing is fine as long as it's on that person's terms and not in questions. Also someone asking that basically implies that they wanna use me for sex. And are judging that based on a number if they wanna go through with using me or not.

[Apple1996]

@jahaims almost like they are shopping for a partner instead of getting to know the real me

[jahaims]

I could see why it would imply that for most people. I have a hard time relating to those ideas because I dont feel that way personally. Thanks for spelling it out for me. I hope it wasn't too painful, lol.

[Adaeva]

A man should assume that any woman who refuses to tell her body and other important information about her character is unfit to be a wife. He should assume she is a whore that he should fuck but never marry.

[Adaeva]

Because the latest studies show that it does matter if a guy is interested in a relationship. You wouldn't mind them asking if your body count was 0, 1, or 2. However, you know your body count is way too high and that is why you are posting as Anonymous.

[Adaeva]

The worst possible thing for a man is to raise another man's child believing he sired the child. The reverse situation is not possible and a major reason a high body count in a man doesn't matter. Furthermore, character matters and a man wants a woman of good character, and women with high body counts are sluts, whores, and trailer trash and are undesirable as a marriage partner.

[tzdc21]

Those "men" have good reasons to ask that.

Let me explain the four big reasons why it matters to a man when dealing with a woman. Buckle up, this is gonna take a while.


1) Men and Women are both biologically hardwired to be attracted and disgusted by certain things. It just so happens that one of the things we guys are instinctively disgusted by are promiscuous women as our girlfriend and/or wife. That's just our nature, just like how it's in a woman's nature to look for a man who can provide and protect. Now when it comes to just sex, they won't care, but a committed relationship is a whole different ballpark.


2) Stats show that the higher a woman's body count, the more likely she will initiate breakups and divorces. AND it's more likely she will have mental problems down the long run. You lose your ability to pair bond with every new sexual partner you have, and that's what helps relationships work through tough times... or in general.


3) When you (a woman) are in a relationship with a man, you are becoming a representation of that man, whether you know it or not. That means that what you say or do is gonna affect him to. So therefore, if you're a hoe, or you say or do some crazy and stupid stuff, not only are you putting yourself in a bad light, but you're putting your boyfriend/husband in a bad light. Because everyone is gonna be like, "This crazy girl is his?" or "This hoe is who he is taking seriously?" That is embarrassing for any man, even if he won't admit it to others or himself.


4) THIS IS THE MOST IMPORTANT REASON. There is a reason why since the dawn of time, men have demanded that the women they take seriously are virgins. Not all guys nowadays want virgins now, but still want lower body counts from the woman they take seriously. And the reason why is because they want to ensure paternity. I assume I would be correct if I were to say that a deep dark fear for a lot of women is being r@ped in a dark alley by some creep. That deep feeling of fear that you get, the male equivalent to that, is when he busts his ass, investing his blood, sweat, and tears into raising a child, and then finding out one day that the kid was never his. That's why guys have an issue with taking promiscuous women seriously. Because if you take a promiscuous woman seriously, and she gets pregnant, there's a good chance that child may not be yours.

[Billlewis]

Guys didn't just start wanting to know how many guys a woman has had sex with recently, it's just more obvious now because of the internet. We ask you how many guys you've had sex with for one of two reasons -- we either want to have sex with you right away, or we think it's exciting that you've been with a lot of men. In my case, I just get so turned on, knowing that you've had an active social and sexual life.

[Lliam]

I never had a relationship with a virgin and never asked a woman about her body count. None ever asked about mine, either. That would be extremely rude.

Someone who does that has sexual hang ups and is too immature, mindless and boorish to deserve a partner. They should be incels for life and cry about it to anyone who will listen.

[Anonymous]

This isn’t something that just all of a sudden mattered. It’s always mattered w a majority of men. They just don’t say it because they’re going to been seen as the asshole, ruin their chances of getting laid. Yes double standards. Men usually don’t want a girl who’s been passed around the block a few times. She’s tainted in our eyes. Especially if his friends know what type of past she’s had.

[Nikki1989]

You don't get out much, do you?

[jahaims]

Don't like his opinion, so you throw out a baseless insult. Nice

[DextroShade]

@Nikki1989 Shame, Insults, Guilt, and the Need to be right.

[Opinion Owner]

Trust me I get out a lot. See the issue is that men don’t often tell women the truth because you either get your feelings hurt or you don’t believe it. Just like I’m telling you. Body counts have always mattered to a majority of men, but they aren’t going to tell you the truth. There’s a lot of things men don’t tell women the truth about because we’d end up looking like the bad person. Women want the truth from men but when they tell you the truth you either don’t like it or don’t believe their answers.

[DextroShade]

It has always mattered to men since the dawn of recorded history because women with high body counts make poor wives and cannot be trusted for paternity. I think directly asking a woman her body count on a date is stupid though because she will either get offended, lie, or both so a man should just infer her body count through her appearance, actions, and the kind of pictures she posts.

[abc3643]

It isn't all of a sudden.
It's been since the dawn of time.

This picture summarizes it in modern terms.

[ProbablyClueless]

It could just be a cultural thing of the moment, but body count isn't something I've ever wanted to know.

[goldenboybrady]

The only count I usually care about is a lass' bra size. (Unless she's bopped, say, fifty or sixty dudes, then I'd begin to wonder about her.) Broads have libidos like dudes.

[Staximus]

Because you can't turn a whore into a housewife. My friend tried and she ended up fucking all the neighbors while he was at work.

[LiamJHayden]

Those guys might spend too much time talking with the "He-Man Women Haters Club" members and not enough time meeting Darlas.

[jahaims]

It tells you what kind of person she is. Let's you have insight into her morals, values and trauma.

[Nikki1989]

Don't judge that with men on here. Most men don't care.

[OddBeMe]

Yet their body count is irrelevant. Lol

We’re regressing a bit socially thus some men desire virgins to marry or whatever. It’s sick.

[Slim57]

It's not all of a sudden. There's always been men who care about it and ones that don't.

[Anonymous]

Those guys want sex right away. I never discuss such things until we are ready for sex.

[ChicoFromThe305]

Are you scared to tell them your body count? Lmao

[Danny_dan92]

It matters based on the context and facts.

[Still-alive]

They wanna slut shame. avoid them

[Nifrayu]

No idea.

[Nifrayu]

Why does it annoy you so much though?