Things you ignored early in dating you regret?

[RoseySarah]

Like things that would normally be red flags but you ignored?

Mine is he can't cook

Cooking skills

Bed time skills

Wrong love language

Red flags

Pushing for Thier way

Relationship history/cheating

Their friends

[DaveJord]

Starting out I always try to avoid making assumptions, bad or good. I always say I never assume the worse, but I will never assume the best either. So they will only get what they put into it, and their effort will determine what type of relationship it becomes.

So I will not say I ignore, but I give used to give them too much benefit of the doubt.

Things I look for, their texting ability and style... how responsive they are. How easy it is to make plans, how busy do they come off all the time. Like I ignore this stuff for about a week or two before I make up my mind.

[RoseySarah]

Sounds okay

[DaveJord]

I voted for Red Flags... there are just too many things to get to specific but Red Flags covers it honestly.

[RoseySarah]

Thanks

[midnightmoon05]

I don’t live with regrets in my life.
I alwys look at a persons potentials. Since I mostly know what I want, I have picked good guys. But that doesn’t mean they are perfect matches.
1. was adapted. He told me he and his sister got money after their parents pasted away. But he used all. That was one date.
2. I married my first husband, the famous mother in law that cause things to end.
3. an alcoholic- he hid it well… 1 1/2 … ended… not good for my kids.

4. my second husband … lots of red flags…we dealt with… broke up for a yr. Now married. Since we dealt with the stuff before we got married. Things are good now

each is an experience… learn from it, grow then do it again.

if one didn’t learn, will respect.

[RoseySarah]

You have an amazing story sorry you went through those awful guys! The worst are the ones who hide things so well!

My hubby and I dealt with things early on also but it's work and not easy.

Your man sounds wonderful 😊

[midnightmoon05]

Marriage is an institution…you two continue to work hard, very hard for each other. Continue to make the changes and grow together.
If you have children, both work together to raise them.
Enjoy the journey. ❤️

[VanityFair888]

I've ignored so many red flags and surprisingly I ended in a loving and healthy relationship and it worked out for both of us. But we were communicating all the time and we both wanted to improve. However if we divorced, I don't think I'd deal with someone with same red flags.

[RoseySarah]

Aw congrats a wonderful success story!
How long was the commute? Ours was hour 30 around 3 times a week

[VanityFair888]

What do you mean by commute?

[RoseySarah]

Sorry misread communicating!

I mean driving back and forth

[VanityFair888]

We never had to drive back and forth, we lived like 30 minutes away from each other

[Anonymous]

I was raised to believe all women were ladies. What load of 💩 that was.🤣 So since I was raised with this mindset I didn't realize that there was a very finite number of quality women. And by 25 they pretty much all married. So if I regret anything I regret not knowing that there were a finite number of quality women. But do I really regret it? No, not really. Life is about choices. I'm single, but I have money. And based on seeing a lot of guys my age financially busted by the girls they married I don't really regret my choices.

[RoseySarah]

Kinda the same with us girls. Taught to be kind not treat trash as it should be.

[LaFemmeFatale_1]

I don’t regret anything, I have had one relationship so far and I am happy for the experience and life lessons it gave me.

[RoseySarah]

Congrats glad you have no regrets!
What was the red flag that ended it?

[LaFemmeFatale_1]

Mainly pandemic and the long distance caused bu it - ended it.😊

[RoseySarah]

Sorry long distance is such a relationship killer especially if you were close before not starting out with it.

[Finchie40]

I didn’t check her medicine cabinet , I so regretted not doing that lol

[RoseySarah]

What was in it?

I sometimes do but even then have to look up what meds they have

[Finchie40]

Anti depressants , she suffered from pTSD, severe anxiety and depression, if I knew she suffered from that , I wouldn’t of gave her my heart , one of the worst relationships I ever been in , it’s like being in a relationship with Dr Jekyll Mr Hyde , never again

[hppygrl]

Alcoholism 😩 as a naive high school senior I dated a boy in my grade who had tons of other great qualities and we were a good match in those ways but the fact that he had been drinking a case a day since age 14 should have been a warning sign. I learned this after staying with him for 6 long years.

[RoseySarah]

Wow 6 years and drinking a case a day! You held on so tight and well.
What was it that ended things? A final straw?

[hppygrl]

Part of the time we were both in college so that masked some of it but yeah when people are abusive drunks it gets old really quick. I didn’t have that in my family so I learned by experience. I was really depressed when it ended but I also felt so relieved, like I could hang out with non dysfunctional people again.

[NathanDavis]

none... I've been very selective and also took my time to actually get to know more of someone, before I ended up in a relationship with that someone

as for the things that cannot exactly be foreseen... guess I was just very lucky with that, lol

[mandyfire98]

I dated a guy once that early on he showed he was extremely insecure. It went as expected. Ended up being toxic.

[RoseySarah]

Sounds clingy also
Insecure ones are hard you want to like them but they get toxic and will never be happy.

[mandyfire98]

He turned out to be a covert narcissist. Nightmare

[RoseySarah]

Ooo omg hate those my boss is one

[kareenakapur]

red flags for sure He got upset when I talked about staying a virgin till marriage

[RoseySarah]

Huge one and one I say means he just wants sex and can't hide it!

What happened?

[kareenakapur]

he told me that there would be a issue of consent basically told me he'd stick it in w out my consent lol

[RoseySarah]

Wtf relationship over!. he better not have!

Is this your ex or current boyfriend?

[kareenakapur]

ex lol was a red flag but i still liked him

[kareenakapur]

im not w anyone rn

[RoseySarah]

Course we like them but that red flag.
Hard to let go 😞
Sorry it ended

[Constatine]

honestly I regret one thing... one thing I ignored while dating my now ex wife.

that one thing was ME! i ignored myself.. I knew something was up... but I was young. I though I noticed things because I was afraid of dating.

since then I no longer ignore myself.. and listen to the good and bad vibes

[MiddleAgedClimbee]

Sometimes we have challenges showing affection in each other's love language.

[RoseySarah]

That is hard how different were yours? 1

[MiddleAgedClimbee]

When I show kindness and patience, it really makes her swoon, I really like verbal cues from her as well as physical touch like a hug or handholding.

[ProbablyClueless]

I've ignored friend issues. I've also ignored super casual acts of disrespect. I once went on a date with a woman who rolled her eyes at our waiter. The only reason I ignored it was because I couldn't believe that she did it.

[Joshydavid25]

Her "friends".. She was still friends with some of her exes, and one in particular just didn't sit right with me.. I was actually right in the end, but hey it's over.

[petitedollbabee]

In my current relationship? Nothing. I wouldn’t have stayed with my partner for so long if there was a part of him that wasn’t compatible with me.

[IslaTheWitch]

Violence and aggression.

[RoseySarah]

O no what is the story on how you found those out?

[IslaTheWitch]

Four years of abusive relationship. And some scars. But I was young and stupid. And desperate

[RoseySarah]

What was the final straw

[IslaTheWitch]

He beat me when I was so tired and sad that I cried. And he didn't like it when I cried.

[RoseySarah]

So glad you survived that horror! Your amazing

[IslaTheWitch]

Thanks

[exitseven]

I have dated girls who would have had sex with me but I was so stupid I did not realize it.

[LavLavLuv]

He was... lazy af

[RoseySarah]

Could never get him off the couch?
So awful
My friends hubby just hangs out at home Depot never getting work just drinking.

[Slim57]

Red flags, distancing themselves slowly

[GoodGuyBreakingBad]

Red Flags

[Jennz6]

Red flags 🚩 for sure

[Worst]

Her penis was bigger than mine

[RoseySarah]

So believe it!
When did it get to be a huge issue?

[Worst]

When she gave me an anal fissure

[007kingifrit]

don't date women in therapy

[love_conquers_lust]

Avoidance.