In a partner, which attracts you more at first sight; intelligence or looks?

Question

MrOracle · Accepted Answer

In nearly all cases, everyone is going to see physical appearance first, because you can see that from a distance and you can see it quickly. It takes time and physical proximity to be able to learn about a person's personality, intelligence, or morals and values. That doesn't make those things less important, they just take more time and effort to discover.

While looks are always going to matter to some extent, what I look for the most is morals, values, and attitude. That's more important to me than her having the best looks, and more important than her intelligence, education, or career. Intelligence is a nice bonus, as is education, but those things can never make up for poor morals and values, or a rotten attitude.

If you aren't on the same page with a person's morals and values, you can never have trust between each other, which means you will never be able to sustain a relationship with them. Far too many people, men and women both, focus way too much on looks or status and not nearly enough on morals and values, and wonder why they always get hurt and have their relationships blow up in their faces. Unfortunately, the media and society in general encourages shallow, self centered behavior, and most people aren't strong enough to break out of their programming, even when that programming causes them to lose again and again.

RebelinSteel · Accepted Answer

Looks will get your attention, however for me it’s how they interact with others, their attitude. For example having a meal out, how they interact with those serving food, getting drinks etc. At a party how they interact with others, they could be amazingly gorgeous but if they treat others like shit, I would switch them off. Intelligence is a hard one to judge, in public interactions it’s not about having a degree, it’s about their natural intelligence, with some not having any qualifications but being really smart and intelligent.

DizzyDesii · Accepted Answer

Honestly looks and then personality/intelligence. Intelligence isn’t a must have but just don't be a dumbass. Anyways, I’m currently dating an extremely booksmart mf, he just lacks a bit of common sense. We have that in common though. 😂 The shit he knows about automobiles and what's under the hood as well as seeing how good he is when it comes to math and calculations really gets me. On the other hand, I suck at math but am better at English/artsy related shit. I know more about the exterior of automobiles while he focuses on the interior. Its definitely an opposites attract situation that I’m not used to and honestly I wouldn’t go for this with anyone else. I definitely prefer similarities over differences

wolfcat87 · Accepted Answer

I'm always gonna gravitate towards people who seem most intelligent in a room. For example, if I see a group of jocks vs a group of nerds totally geeking out over STEM topics, I'm going to run to the group of nerds geeking out over steam topics. The guys I like are going to be in that group 95% of the time. Engineers make my panties fall off 😆

That being said, there are nerds who look like and may also be jocks. My son is one of those, but he found his tribe as soon as he opened his mouth.

A pretty face isn't worth much without a pretty brain behind it. I may enjoy eye candy like I would a painting, but I'm not going to have sex with a painting just because it's pretty...

NathanDavis · Answer

at first sight... chances are I will only know of looks and appearance, so that might be an initial interest, intrigue or attraction

but the one that will keep me interested and attracted will definitely be about personality and character, not the physicality

Lliam · Answer

At first sight, it's always looks. I wouldn't date a girl that I didn't find physically attractive. Mannerisms and behavior are part of appearance.

But once I start talking to her, personality and intelligence are very important in continuing to pursue a relationship.

R-OnTheWater · Answer

I can't look at someone's intelligence, so I can't be attracted to that "at first sight." After I get to know a girl, I can find her intelligence interesting, and it can make me feel differently about her, but it doesn't usually make me think she is sexy, so it doesn't usually have much to do with attraction. I guess I do find a girl less attractive if she's really obviously not smart at all, so there is something to it, But I don't think that men get attracted to intelligence the same way that women do. I think the same goes with strength and confidence as well. These are things that I appreciate about a woman, but won't make me feel attracted to her.

I find it attractive if she is very sweet and kind, or very cheerful. Funny and flirty is also attractive.

I Don't think that men are more shallow than women; we can be attracted to personalities as well, just different attributes of their personalities.

GuyAnswersGirls123 · Answer

I suppose looks? Although I find women attractive when they look intelligent. Looks from my perspective are just one piece of data to try to figure out her characteristics.

So the question is a bit confusing to me. A question that makes more sense to me with the way my brain works would be like "Looks" vs. "Voice" vs. "Verbal" data as what we consider most reliable sources of information.

Miristheiss · Answer

Looks.

I can see that right away. I can clearly see that her face and body attract me.

Intelligence? It takes time to figure that out.

I'll be honest, intelligence isn't necessarily an attraction point. I wouldn't be turned on by her more because she knows a lot of facts. I'm more attracted to morals, character, class, loyalty, a sweet, loving spirit.

Iron_Man · Answer

Obviously, it’s the beauty at first because you’re not even talking to her you’re just looking from the distance before you even met then after that, if you’re gonna stay together and have a connection, you have to have intelligence that stimulates the mind

HawkPerception · Answer

Looks first. It's what makes me interested in getting to know them in the first place. Then once I start talking to them, intelligence attracts me. You can't really be attracted to someone's intelligence before their looks 😅

OfMiceandMen · Answer

I think you are going based on how they look before you even talk to them. That being said, I've made a U-turn once I spoke to some women and realized there's not much going on upstairs or they're🦇 💩🤪.

IslaTheWitch · Answer

Smarty and witty. Pure intelligence is overrated

bobalife · Answer

Depends… it can be one or the other. I need a combination of both level of attraction and more. Maybe more so on intelligence… talking nerdy to me is sexy lolz.

exitseven · Answer

Looks. Not in the sense of beauty but in the sense that i look at body language to see if somebody is kind and friendly. If somebody smiles at me warmly I think that is is somebody I want to know better.

BoopBoopBeep · Answer

"At first sight" anyone who says intelligence is virtue signaling. You don't see someone's intelligence from across the room.

ProbablyClueless · Answer

At first sight? It would have to be appearance by necessity, right? Because you don't know if someone is intelligent until you start really talking with them.

Guido · Answer

Looks play small part as there needs to be a level of attraction however, intelligence is more important than looks. I don't care how good looking she is, if she is dumb then it's a non starter.

BlissfullyCurSed · Answer

I just don't know how one can tell whether someone's intelligent or not at first sight.

Katebfun · Answer

Intelligence because usually this adds to their look.

SotiCoto · Answer

Glasses. But regardless of what I like to look at, I wouldn't even bother talking to someone who wasn't intellectually on a level with me.

nawtee_me · Answer

Intelligence or the lack of can only br known as you get to know that person. However it has never been a factor in judging their attractiveness.

TheSpaceGnome · Answer

Looks.  You can't see intelligence level immediately.

JacobJordan · Answer

A first sight you can't tell if someone is intelligent.

CozyCoffin · Answer

Looks, although by observation, you can tell somewhat how they are.

genericname85 · Answer

looks obviously. intellgience is not something you can "see at first sight".

Anonymous · Answer

Attracts? Looks for sure. I can't swing a dead cat without hitting a half dozen intelligent people.

hardy_25 · Answer

Looks would be 25 percent Personality/How they are as a person... with me would be 75 percent

EmmaMary · Answer

Personality and Intelligence.

Enginn · Answer

First sight means looks so yeah thats it for me.

ab2shifty · Answer

I mean if it’s first sight, wouldn’t it be looks 🤔

riverrat3 · Answer

Generally you see her looks before you know anything about her

justabuddy · Answer

Looks gets my attention in a crowd but everything else will get me to stay.

sheikalana · Answer

It's a combination of both honestly.

OtterMan68 · Answer

hard to tell IQ at first sight

handsomelad70 · Answer

I'm a man. What do you think?

lildkman1010 · Answer

Honestly how she carries herself

Hispanic-Cool-Guy · Answer

Physical looks always goes first in attraction.

Radiate143 · Answer

Looks first.

Anonymous · Answer

Intelligence but then I'm asexual

Anonymous · Answer

I'd say intelligence. I like my women dumb.

Anonymous · Answer

Looks first, then intelligence.

slatyb · Answer

Intelligence

Anonymous · Answer

Definitely looks at first.

Anonymous · Answer

Looks but if she's dumb. It'll be a one hit wonder

BarryLiverstone · Answer

Always looks

LavLavLuv · Answer

Intelligence

Anonymous · Answer

Intelligence.

In a partner, which attracts you more at first sight; intelligence or looks?

Most Helpful Opinions

What Girls & Guys Said

Which one impress you more in a potential partner? Intelligence or look?

In a partner, which attracts you more at first sight; intelligence or looks?

Most Helpful Opinions

What Girls & Guys Said

Which one impress you more in a potential partner? Intelligence or look?

We're glad to see you liked this post.