So I’m 22 with no children working on my career. I also wanna date but I’m really irritated because I only attract older men. I mean late 30’s and up and they all have kids. I don’t understand why I can never attract men around my age! It really messes up my self esteem. When older men approach me, and I tell them I have no kids and that they are a little too old for me, they get offended!! Like sir what could we possibly have in common? And ur a parent! I don’t wanna be a step-mommy! I’m literally in my prime!! Some of these older men are so delusional I swear! Anyway but yea can anyone give me advice on how to attract men my age? I wanna meet someone young like me to grow old with. Thank you :)
As someone who's also in your age group, I can give you a couple pointers that may help you. Let me start by saying that one thing you NEED to understand about the men your age group is that we're all simple-minded creatures, and more than huge aspirations and stuff like that, we desire the simpler, more finer things in life more.
Nothing attracts us more in a woman than a girl who's a great person to hold conversations with, is fun to hang out with, can take a joke and joke back, or if not, can laugh along with us in our silly humor, and is mentally and emotionally mature. Guys our age also don't want a girl who's emotionally unavailable or just loves to play mind games, and believe it or not, most of us who've already been through a tough break-up already, or have been single for most our lives (because gen z is doing worse than literally every other generation before it so far), WILL NOT play into the mind games that girls nowadays like to play.
If you're thinking playing hot and cold will make him chase you more and make you seem desirable, well guess what? All you're going to be getting are you're messages being left on seen and him simply just not responding to anything you send him. Us men in our early twenties are simple-minded creatures, which is why we also get played easily, and when we do, yeah. It's not nice and it breaks us, because we usually have no one looking out for us.
So yeah, in summary, how can you attract men your age? Just be a decent, sweet and genuine human being who doesn't beat around the bush and is honest about their feelings. If you're already all those things, get out there and meet new people.
All the best!10 Reply
Most Helpful Opinions
+1 yYou will have to look in places where guys your age that want to marry congregate. Good luck with that as presently 50% of single men do not ever intend to marry and supposedly that number is growing. Unfortunately you are going to struggle because of your gender. A very loud very vocal minority have almost destroyed women as a gender with their false accusations of rape, sexual assault, abuse, divorce just so they can steal half of a man's possessions. Cheating and forcing a man to pay for a child that isn't his and a few other things. It is quite sad because I see a lot of young men and women that want to get married and be happy but neither are able to find each other because of various movements trying to destroy everything. If you want any hope of marrying I highly recommend you avoid everything modern women say you should do. Avoid going for career growth, avoid taking pictures of yourself a lot, avoid revealing clothes, avoid sleeping around, avoid talking badly about men, avoid modern women as a whole, if modern women say you should do it don't. They are miserable and alone and want you to be miserable and alone just like them.
00 Reply
329 opinions shared on Dating topic. All men, regardless of their age, want to marry a girl your age. Every simp, your age wants to marry you but, in your mind, they are not good enough. Fortunately, they are not as persistent as older men. On another site, the most frequent question I am asked is, "Do you like older men?"
I respond that I talk to (no touching) older men but you are above my dating range. Sometimes, they say, "Age is only a number," but seldom are older men rude. It is only that they keep trying and keep hoping.
Your problem is the same as mine. The guys I want are not asking. Well, they all ask for sex but not marriage. That is because they can or at least believe they can do better than me.
If I am not engaged by this time next year, I will lower my expectations a bit and lower them further the following year. By age 22, I will lower them enough to get married, because I am not going to hang around hoping for the improbable while my sexual market is dropping.
If getting married is important to you, lowering your unrealistic standards is what you should do. Your desirability has peaked and it is downhill after age 22. If you keep waiting until age 25, guys you reject now will start rejecting you.
58 Reply- +1 y
She's preaching...
Although I think desirability for women is more towards 30, that's when looks really can begin to fade/weight changes but more importantly the biological clock starts. - +1 y
@Kelley1 Smart woman, recognizing time is an asset.
I would suggest you can only improve your strategy by following the 30% rule which is what we use in similar cases to get the ideal match under such restrictions of ignorance and time.
Recognizing that your main problem is your own ignorance of the market (men available to you) and that this market is diminishing with time (good men marry off and you lose time in your life together).
1: You first have to establish what that market really is.
This is what most people do very poorly due to modern media showing us the richest and most beautiful of people as if they really were commonly available to everyone. Hence why standards are unaffordable. Everyone just thinks they are simply unlucky, when they are not.
2: Recognize that time is important factor.
Younger people more than most have a hard time understanding the value of time, because they have seen soo little of it.
Solution:
It is found in other situations such as parking, finding an apartment, an employee, etc...
A: That if you take the maximum amount of time you are willing to wait.
B: Then only spend about 1/3 of that time figuring out what the market actually is via the attribute combinations actually available to you. (make a list of what you find and its attributes)
C: Then simply take the first option that meets the best of those in the remaining 2/3rds.
You are unlikely to do better.
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Not true I don't like younger women. Should start with most men or vast majority of men makes the blanket statement more accurate. Though the rest of your post is fairly accurate
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@HotLentilzzz not sure when it plummeted so far my wife is 41 and looks like she is 23. Looks began to fade when people stop taking care of themselves
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@HotLentilzzz Biologically a woman sexual attractiveness peaks at age 14 and it is downhill from there.

In a survey where the minimum age was 20, most men selected age 20, the minimum age.
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I am sorry but that is a crock of shit. 30 second Google reveals ranges from 18 - 30 with test groups in the thousands or 10s of thousands. And by ranges I mean hundreds of websites ranging from news sources to social media sites to psychological college studies etc.
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@JacobJoran you're bot helping the point you're attempting to make. you're saying a woman needs to look to be attractive? She can't look 41 for you to find her attractive?
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@HotLentilzzz I am saying that age has little to do with attractiveness. Long as you take care of yourself you will be attractive for a long time. It is when you stop taking care of yourself or start making poor choices that your attractiveness begins to fade.
+1 yTry going online or going on meetup groups. Or if you're religious, then church young adult groups.
Good luck. I met my ex here and he was around my age, but for reasons I cannot disclose here, it didn't work, but maybe it could work for you.
If not, then I'd try going to college or going to work. Lots of good, un partnered, no children, type of men there as well. But yeah, also depends on where you're looking.
01 Reply- +1 y
Edit: The gym or the market is a good place as well. Literally anywhere really, as long as you are open to chatting people up and exchanging phone numbers. Don't do late night clubs or bars though since I don't know if that's the safest place to look.
What Girls & Guys Said
Opinion
32Opinion
1.3K opinions shared on Dating topic. I am one of the few older guys out there who has no desire for young women around your age whatsoever. But yeah, it is more than common for many men my age and older to all want young things, so you're going to deal with it a lot.
I really can't say why guys your own age aren't approaching. It could be for reasons we can't see about you in real life. Maybe you're like other girls who purposely wear cold, standoff-ish expressions but then hate that no guys want to talk to you, or maybe you appear too young for guys your age. Or it simply could be a bare fact that they don't find you attractive. Again, we really don't know because we have no idea what you look like or what you're doing, but there must be some kind of reason guys aren't interested.
02 Reply- +1 y
I don't know about her but I never had guys my age like me. It was always 30s+. I think its cuz im too ugly for guys my age but the older guys were attracted to my youth. Now im 25 and 20 yr old guys check me out 🙄. Im into older men now though
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@HotLentilzzz Well, it is true that younger guys tend to become fascinated with women older than them. It happened to me as well, but the difference between me and most men is that my desire for older never went away even as I got older. Instead it has gotten stronger.
3.2K opinions shared on Dating topic. Best thing for you to do is go for the guys’ you are interested in, don’t wait for them to come to you , most guys’ in general are shy when they see a beautiful girl , they feel she won’t be into him , so they won’t approach you because they are nervous and scared to be denied , Most guys’ love when a girl approaches him first. Times have changed , it’s ok for a girl to ask a guy out
00 Reply16.6K opinions shared on Dating topic. Don't you meet any men your age professionally? How about through friends?
00 Reply- 2.2K opinions shared on Dating topic.
+1 yI think your bias towards all men that are 30 and up is a little too negative and untrue for all of them. I understand that everyone has their preferences and it's completely fine for you to desire a man around your age, but you shouldn't put other guys down just because they're older. Most women actually prefer older men. Some only a couple years difference, some 5 years and up, and others could be 10 years difference or more. It's because of a dominant, submissive dynamic in relationships. Men generally prefer smaller, shorter, weaker, younger females and girls generally like bigger, taller, stronger, older men. It also translates to the bedroom.
Most men also don't figure out their lives until later on in life and missed the opportunity to do a lot of things in their younger years. You could have a lot more in common than you realize.
Anyways, away from that topic. If you want to attract men around your age or any men in general, you have to socialize and go to places where you can meet them. The other option is dating apps, but meeting organically is always the best way to go. Don't be afraid to approach them either. Most men are oblivious and nowadays don't approach women as much because we're always under some surveillance and in fear that something will be called harassment. Just start a conversation...
At a cafe: "Hey what's your favourite drink that you get here?"
At a library: "Oh I love that genre! What do you like about (genre)?"
At a bar: "Hi my name's (your name). How often do you come here? I'm new."
Etc.
Open your mouth and approach.04 Reply- +1 y
@Claire2002 you must be illiterate. It's as if you didn't read a word I said.
- +1 y
@Claire2002 and I answered that.
- +1 y
@Claire2002 If you can't see that the whole second part of her description was basically negative assumptions about men 30 and older then you really are illiterate. And it's not like I care if she thinks that or not. It's not like I'm trying to date her. I'm trying to broaden her horizons. Something you should try as well.
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@Claire2002 You're clueless and likely will be for a good portion of your life. Wish ya luck
Anonymous(36-45)+1 yYou can't. That's not how attraction works. If you make yourself more attractive, you attract more of ALL men, young men, old men, married men, single men, smart men, dumb men, religious men, degenerate men--literally ALL men. And if you are less attractive (say you throw on 50lbs) you'll attract fewer men of all kinds.
Attraction is a BLUNT tool. It's like an atom-bomb--not a sniper rifle. You can't "target" it at just the dudes you like.
All you CAN do is screen out the dudes who you don't want to date. If you do that and there are no guys left who you WANT to date, my suggestion to you is put yourself in an environment where there are LOTS of guys of the type you want. In your case of the same age. Turns out there IS an environment that's just TEEMING with dudes your age: college! But it seems maybe you've already left college and are out in the world. Well, now it's going to be tougher because people your age are more spread out. You're still very close to college age so you could hit up a nearby campus. Else, you can consider joining groups that have a lot of people in your demo (alumni groups are one such example, or various "young professionals" groups). Or friends of friends, etc.
If that doesn't work in the next few years as you work on your career, you could consider going to business school to get your MBA and and MRS.
Good luck!
10 Reply2.4K opinions shared on Dating topic. good luck.
Females mature 2 to 3 years earlier than males.
It's just how mother nature designed us.
So either find someone older which it sounds like that is who you have been running into because they are looking for someone younger, or eventually you will find someone that is more mature for their age.
Possibly where you are looking and where you are meeting them needs to be changed, or the type of person, pretty boys, gym rats, self centered, maybe you need to change that as well. Hang in there the right person is out there, you just haven't met them yet.
Finding the right person is a lot of work, just like a job.
It takes a lot of time and effort.03 Reply- +1 y
@Claire2002 He never specifically implied that she should like older men only. He did mention "... or eventually you will find someone that is more mature for their age... Hang in there the right person is out there, you just haven't met them yet."
That sounded like positive advice in my opinion.
You just seem like a typical misandrist woman, as well as illiterate.
720 opinions shared on Dating topic. You're going about it in the wrong order for one thing.
If you go about trying to find a partner in one step, like explicitly trying to pick up strangers with the intent to find a life partner, everything will end up screwed up one way or another.
A better way to handle things is to start with something you like doing. A hobby or somesuch. Then find social events or gathering spots for that interest where others with similar interests get together. If you can manage that much then you should end up with both more friends AND romantic potentials in due course... and since the shared interests will already be there and you'll have to get to know each other without everything being tainted by "looking for a relationship", the potential for being horribly mismatched is lower.00 Reply- 1.1K opinions shared on Dating topic.
+1 yWhether around your age or older, you will find many many insecure males who can't take rejection well and get butthurt because they don't work on acknowledging and getting over their insecurities. Dating is very rough nowadays and many around your age want hookups that develop into relationships. If you want a relationship based on getting to know each other, good luck, but it's easier with guys. Most of us are honest and straightforward with our intentions and our hintings are pretty obvious. Just be straightforward and you will have better luck, compliments help too since men very rarely get them. Just be careful of the red flags
00 Reply 785 opinions shared on Dating topic. It’s not about ‘who you attract’. That’s not important, so why focus on it?
It should be about who attracts you!
If you see someone you like, make the first move.
And while I’m here, I may as well say don’t dismiss someone based on age alone. You could miss someone special. (And not all fathers want a mum for their kids. That’s a bit of a sweeping assumption from you).22 Reply- +1 y
That is not her problem. All women will make the first move by smiling and saying to indicate, it is okay to approach. Her problem is she has unrealistic standard. She doesn't really want just a good man she doesn't want a husband what she's really wanting are these standards or ideas that she has of what a man is supposed to be but this is nothing what men are there this is not realistic for who men are. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sZYXtHAiMoA
- +1 y
Best comment
- 406 opinions shared on Dating topic.
+1 ySo older guys are attracted to pretty young girls…plus they aren't afraid to go after those girls. so you will be hit on by older men, that fact won't change. Younger guys aren't as bold as the older men. So less likely to chase after a girl. With age comes confidence and wisdom…. So if you want younger men you might have to be the one to show interest first.
14 Reply- +1 y
@BadApple69 this so true?
- +1 y
Yes it’s true and yes you can private me. I’ll talk to you.
+1 yAh shit... even AI bot already cheated on me here. I was gonna say men your age are struggling and they'd like to find women, but they can't afford to. That's why you gotta send me nudes.

Winning the race of life. 00 ReplyI am sorry, there's so many guys. My age are older after girls like you. Don't settle for guys my age. I'm 33. I don't need a 22-year-old. I agree, you're too Young for me and I'm too old for you. You can do dating apps which I know suck. Also I'm sure you can meet guys anywhere. If you got guys approaching you even older, you're obviously attractive, the guys your age might just be scared of you because of how attractive you probably are.
00 Reply- 1.1K opinions shared on Dating topic.
+1 yYou can easily attract men your own age but there is a catch: they won't be rich because wealth takes time for men to acquire. If he is young and rich he is likely an entertainer, athlete, or drug dealer and he will sleep with other girls. If you want a serious relationship with a man near your own age you will have to build with him.
10 Reply 646 opinions shared on Dating topic. A group activity. Maybe a Meet up event and see who is attending. An activity done by people around your age. It sounds strange. Sometimes there are events where clubs have demonstrations of what they're all about for all to see, you can check there who is in that club.
You can also just walk up to someone you like. My girlfriend was a stranger sitting across. To her, I was a stranger. To her now, I'm her boyfriend. But both wouldn't know what could be if none of them tried.00 ReplyIf you are working on your career it's already over. You'll never have time for kids and thats the only reason men put up with women. Young men are looking for girls to impregnate. Your dating pool is older more established men that can afford a nanny.
00 Reply- 328 opinions shared on Dating topic.
+1 yYou need to look in the right places. In a bar you're far more likely to find older men and young guys looking to have sex.
In places like a church, a school (sort of), a community center etc. you're not likely to find those around your age that value that. Remember you only need to find one person so don't waste your time trying to fix people or fixating on age
00 Reply
+1 yYou're not saying much about yourself. Do you go out? Do you have hobbies? Do you have a personality? Do you have friends? how do you look?
No offense, but if you look ran down and shabby these types of men are going to approach you because they feel like you settle for the bare minimum and they need someone to take care they kids00 Reply
Anonymous(18-24)+1 yBabble about IG, SC, Tik Tok, all that shit. Talk about yourself... CONSTANTLY. Seek attention like there's no tomorrow. Those are all dead giveaway signs to attract Frat Boy Chad with Bros In Tow. Of course, you'll get spun around faster than a Maytag... but I'm telling you, that's what they look for and eat up faster than Fruity Pebbles. 👉
00 Reply2.1K opinions shared on Dating topic. They are only asking, dearie. No harm in that.
You probably look 40, and they are looking to date a MILF!
Change your Karen attitude and style to something more your age.
00 Reply
Anonymous(36-45)+1 yProbably you are an interesting person, and obviously you attract mature guys. I find no problem at all, but if you badly want immature, young, sex-driven guys you should pretend to be stupid, make up like a doll, wear slutty clothing, and tens of young guys will be excited to go out with you. In two years you'll post "why do all guys want only blowjobs from me?", and we will be glad to help you, again.
00 Reply
+1 y22 isn't your prime. Thats ridiculous. You're not even done developing. But if you really believe you're in your prime, thats why they want you. They think you're in your “prime” too
10 Reply- 4.9K opinions shared on Dating topic.
+1 yI wish i knew. I mostly attract men 19-22 and 30-60. and this was at any age of mine. Smh. I definitely prefer late 20s
10 Reply 1K opinions shared on Dating topic. start asking guys out. stop waiting for them to do it. and reject the ones you don't want that ask you out.
00 Reply
+1 yBe an UWU girl🤣🤣🤣
https://www.youtube.com/embed/laawmdILm0Q00 Reply- 1.3K opinions shared on Dating topic.
+1 yMaybe change your style. It could be you are dressed too old for yourself. Other than that I am not sure.
00 Reply
Anonymous(36-45)+1 yWell go places people your age go I guees, I am on the other side I am pretty old, have no kids but attract younger in their 25-28 when I want my age or even older a bit, I find young women lacking of elegance in both mind and fashion also their emotions and spirituality are a mess
00 Reply- 327 opinions shared on Dating topic.
+1 yThe next time you go for a walk, plop out a boob.
10 Reply
+1 yyou have to be around men in your age to attract them
10 Reply- 8.9K opinions shared on Dating topic.
+1 yit is impossible to attract men of only one age group. cause if you are attractive, you will attract all men. it's like casting a net and expecting one perticular fish not to get into the net.
00 Reply
+1 yThat’s hard because you are focused on your career but people your age are in community college, university or working at a costumer service job. Why you attract older men, in my opinion you act or look more mature for your age.
00 Reply- 446 opinions shared on Dating topic.
+1 yGo to places where there's men your age, and try online dating
00 Reply - 755 opinions shared on Dating topic.
+1 yI like the fact that you recognize you're in your prime. So you understand that a women is most valuable between 18-24
113 Reply- +1 y
18-24? So the ypungest general legal age and the oldest age before are frontal lobe is fully formed? Sounds highly suspicious
- +1 y
@HotLentilzzz I guess the good news for you is that's not something you need to worry about.
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@Claire2002 100% right women make important decisions based on emotion which is why it's easier for older guys to attract younger woman than vice versa
- +1 y
How is that not something I dont need to worry about? Grown as hell men preying on the youngest possible ages is extremely worrisome unless your the p*** who partakes in it
- +1 y
@HotLentilzzz Because that value is based off make standards. Unless you're looking to attract women in your prime it doesn't apply to you.
- +1 y
And the male standards are pe**philic @Vegasrunner
- +1 y
@HotLentilzzz Now I understand, you're saying that 24 year old women aren't adults?
- +1 y
@Vegasrunner you're genuinely saying that there's nothing wrong with cutting off a girl’s desirability the moment she becomes a fully formed adult? This is the type of bs that only fools super naive people. We all know what men really want, but unfortunately most laws dont allow that. The attraction doesn't magically start at 18.
- +1 y
@HotLentilzzz I can't speak to the first part of your question because I didn't say anything remotely like that. If I did kindly screen shot and share it w/ me. Yes, it's no secret men have always preferred younger woman, since the beginning of time. Their is no law preventing men from wanting women between 18-24 so if that's their preference, then we should accept the decision as I'm sure u agree everyone deserves the right to happiness?
- +1 y
@Vegasrunner Obviously I can't do anything about it to stop them. But i can confidentially share my distaste for these cusp-pe***. If it doesn't bother you, you're one of them. And no, not everyone deserves happiness, wtf😂 Im sure it would make 90% of men happy if they could legally lay with a 12 yr old
- +1 y
@HotLentilzzz Not sure why you want to stop others legal pursuit of happiness, perhaps that highlights your own failures. I can speak to what would make a person hypothetically happy, all I can go by is the numbers and studies have proven that men universally find women between 18-24 most attractive, and if that's so they have the right to go after what they want or are you taking the position that women should lower their standards?
- +1 y
@Vegasrunner jesus christ…… what am I even doing. Pe**s can't change. Men are unwell.
- +1 y
@HotLentilzzz You believe it's unwell to have standards?
Don't worry, you're not alone. I also attract older men. I think the guys your age are intimidated by your beauty, so they fear being rejected.
10 Reply
Anonymous(36-45)+1 yOlder men are predators for younger women. I know it is very sad.
11 Reply- +1 y
There is nothing wrong with us going for younger, we are not predators it is to do with nature. The more younger you are the more attractive and younger means less problems with childbirth and conditions. Typical millennial who has the hit the wall comment, and i note you had to go anon to say it.
dress to kill every day till one is found and every day is your first day out hunting
10 Reply2K opinions shared on Dating topic. Because the men your age are not men, they are childlike and their perspective has been distorted by social media and porn.
00 Reply1K opinions shared on Dating topic. Go to events (not clubs) where there are people your age
00 Reply
+1 ybecause all the men want sugar mama. if you become like a sugar mama bitching at men then you will get their attention.
01 Reply- +1 y
Be a sugar mama
Perhaps your age guys do not find you attractive.
00 Reply- 1.2K opinions shared on Dating topic.
+1 yWalk around naked? ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
00 Reply - 474 opinions shared on Dating topic.
+1 yDating apps, work etc.
00 Reply 1.6K opinions shared on Dating topic. Hangout where people your age hangout.
00 Reply
+1 yWhy would your age attract men around it?
00 Reply- 3.4K opinions shared on Dating topic.
+1 yGo to college
00 Reply
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