How do you feel about being responsible for pushing a relationship forward (e. g., asking the person on a date or to marry you)?

[Elena_Stewart]

[JacobJordan]

Something a man should do. That is why men are leaders for relationships. Not just that but we are the protectors and providers. We protect our family above all else. We provide everything we can for the ones we love.

[Elena_Stewart]

Well said🙂

[JacobJordan]

Thank you. Doesn't seem to be a popular opinion in today's society but I don't care. Men are meant to be men and women are meant to be women. My wife naturally defers to me for important decisions because she trusts me to make the best choices for our family. I trust her to let me know if I am potentially making a bad choice.

[Elena_Stewart]

👍🏻🙂

[SolitarySolace]

Even though men are only loved for what he can provide otherwise the only ones who receive unconditional love are children, pets and women

[JacobJordan]

@SolitarySolace a generalization but a fairly accurate one. My wife loved me when I lost almost everything so there are women that love unconditionally.

[NathanDavis]

I've never really been in that situation... fortunately, I've only been with people who like to communicate and to plan together, rather than going at their own pace we've always made sure to match each others

[GuyAnswersGirls123]

I deeply prefer it since when a woman asks me out on a date, for example, she takes the leadership initiative away from me. It throws me off entirely.

All my practice and training for dating is the classic gentleman style. That means doing all sorts of things like walking on the side of the curb with oncoming traffic so that in the extremely rare event that a car swerves off the road, I will be hit and can protect her. It also means paying for dates because that's the responsibility associated with being leader, protector, provider.

The other thing is that women generally don't take the leadership responsibility on very eagerly in my experience. Like if a woman asks me out on a date, I doubt she'll want to pay for the date, protect me from cars swerving on the road, lead me in a dance and twirl me and tip me over to kiss me, pull up my car, hold open the door for me, etc.

I mean I don't mind if she wants to do all that. That would be very relaxing. Yet I doubt so many women will be happy with that leadership responsibility.

[GuyAnswersGirls123]

[...] [*] pull up my [chair] [...]

If she doesn't take on the full leadership responsibility then it seems unfair to me for her to get to ask me out on a date and take that leadership initiative away from me while still enjoying the privilege of being a follower.

Being able to decide who I ask out on the dates is the one little privilege I normally get to enjoy in exchange for arranging the entire date, leading it, protecting, and paying for all of it.

[GuyAnswersGirls123]

Same idea with marriage. If my wife proposed to me and still expected me to pay for the wedding, that seems unfair. If she wants to pay for it, then I don't mind because now she is taking on the associated responsibility of being the leader and initiator of the marriage. But it would be unfair to me if she proposed and still expected me to pay for the bulk of the costs associated.

[GuyAnswersGirls123]

That said, I'm not against progressivism. I might even be a progressive of sorts, just an extremely slow one since I want to stick to what has been demonstrated to work historically.

So if women want to become leaders and initiators, I recommend they study the classic gentleman code of conduct. It's not just a ritual but it's a whole mindset to teach you how to become leader, protector, and provider. For women who truly take on this role as leaders and protectors and providers of their men, they have my deepest respect.

[Elena_Stewart]

Gotcha🙂

[HawkPerception]

I'm the type of guy that always asks how my partner feels about moving out with me or marriage before I even pop the question, but I do feel I am responsible for pushing the relationship forward. I'm a planner. If I know I love the girl and want to move out with her, I'd want to be making enough money for the both of us in case it doesn't work out between us. And proposing and having a dream wedding where my closest loved ones can celebrate the next chapter in my life has always been a dream of mine, so I definitely feel responsible for that aspect.

[boggboss]

Can be hard to do funny enough the other day my fiancé went through some old texts and told me she is suprised I didn't stop trying with her as she saw how dead her side of the conversations where which I feel is a issue many don't seem to get that good conversations or for dating to work requires both to be trying

[Elena_Stewart]

I hope she appreciates that now🙂

[boggboss]

No she definitely does

[red324]

Then you get the girls who only text non stop and have no plan to ever meet. I just assume they aren't interested if they don't respond back within a reasonable time. If it takes 2 days to respond back, she's not interested and just doesn't know how to say so.

[Anonymous]

Well asking a woman on a date is he'll and gone from asking her to marry you. One is a date. The other is a lifetime sentence. I don't really worry about either. Because I've never had a reason to ask a woman to marry me. And I really don't ask women out on dates.

[Amara_09]

I would speak honesty and well, maybe hoping that the partner feels the same way.


But yeah, don’t be shy. Go for it if that’s what you really want

[Massageman]

I never really was that pushy, darn it. At my 50th HS reunions, it turned out that a gal that I really (secretly) liked was liking me back then, but I never did anything about it. darn the luck.

[sheikalana]

Sometimes you need to put a little bit of pressure to move things forward and I don’t see nothing wrong with that.

[Subflics]

I don't mind being responsible. There's just too many obstacles to hurdle as the one putting the work in for it to be worth it anymore

[laly520]

dont remember I've ever pushed or forced

it usually just happen naturally n smoothly

[KittygosMeoWW]

I don’t like that I’d rather be chased

[Xia1994]

yes.

[Xia1994]

oh sorry i misread your post lols, I go for men who like to do the pursuing, he should be the one to ask me on a date and propose to me and ask me to be his girlfriend. I do not let him do all the heavy lifting though so if he asks me on the first date and we hit it off i'll do something nice for him too and get creative with some cute little gifts that i know he would like based on his interests or what not. I also pitch up when it comes to keeping the conversation going i won't let the poor guy do allll the talking it all has to be mutual in certain aspects. even with texting i won't let him do alll the texting and calling and keeping things interesting between us I'll pitch up aswell but that's only after he taskes initiative and pursues me.

[SolitarySolace]

Not gonna happen

[sirderpsalot123]

Normal

[Twalli]

I expect to

[eagle1951]

hard to do