I went out on a few dates with this girl. We had a great time each time and fooled around the second and third date. She stopped me before we "went all the way" on the second date. Which was totally fine no pressure I would never force anyone to do that especially someone I like.
But the 3rd date she wound up at my place again and it got to that point again lots of touching and kissing. She stopped me again, which is fine but she told me basically she wasn't wanting to give herself away so easily as she has in the past. Ok i get it thats fine i didn't push it after she said that.
Since then she hasn't talked to me much. I dont think i did anything wrong. haven't blown up her phone and tried asking her out a week later since she was out of town the previous weekend and she declined.
I found out from a mutual friend it was because I didn't take it further when we were hanging out last, apparently i was "too scared" according to her. like WTF she literally stopped me twice from taking her pants off lol,,, im not gonna force her to have sex with me!. She doesn't know that i know.
Im so confused. Has this happened to anyone else?
What Girls Said
Doesn’t sound like you did anything wrong, and I doubt her withdrawal has anything to do with you respecting her wishes. This could simply be a matter of incompatibility, or someone else getting her attention more than you are. If she’s exploring her options in the dating world then that makes most sense to me. Same as it could be that she isn’t feeling interested in dating you. I know you said you had great dates, but there were only 3 and that could’ve been the time she needed to come to this conclusion.
I get that, and thats fine. But the whole " too scared" thing is strange to me. She was into it but stopped me each time. I was literally told it was because i didn't take things further like she wanted us to have sex. If she wanted me to do that why did she stop me each time. Why even come back to my place to begin with.. thats very confusing.
Take word of mouth with a grain of salt. That may not be her exact wording, but this mutual friend’s interpretation. If you want some real clarity, speak with her directly. Shoot her a text, ask if she’s busy and see if she can get on the phone. I think that would be better than running with what someone else said, because I don't know about you but that’s not even making sense. For her to say she doesn’t want to rush, yet tell someone else you weren’t fast enough? Come on.