There are attractive real people of both sexes everywhere now due to the information age (posts on social media). Is monogamous dating still possible?

[GeorgePulchri]

So, I have been thinking about how we live in the information age now and there are images of real people (not just professional models) posting their bodies on social media.

It's made me realize that regardless of our religious or ethical or moral beliefs, we live in a time when you can't not notice beautiful attractive bodies of the opposite sex all around you.

So, its made me a little hesitant to get into a relationship with someone because I'm a little fearful that my partner will get jealous or insecure that I notice other attractive people (not in a creepy way, and not falling in love with them or cheating, just innocent "noticing").

I wouldn't feel threatened or bad if my partner noticed and acknowledged other men that are more attractive, hot, and muscular than me as well, (I'm pretty average). As long as she didn't cheat if we were married, and as long as she wasn't faking enjoying sex with me, I would be fine with her noticing more attractive people.

What is the correct healthy way to have long term relationships now? Are there women (and men) who are secure enough to not feel disrespected or like their sexual partner relationship is threatened by other attractive people existing?

[Zack-Bann]

You know what never changes no matter the age?


The coping mechanisms we tell ourselves to talk ourselves out of doing something scary.


Yes there are attractive people, so what?
There have always been attractive people.


There’s nothing different to do.
You find your partner and get together with her and build a solid foundation.
If you do, there won’t be any issues


But if you’re gonna live life insecure every time you see someone in better shape than you or with better genetics you will spend your whole life hiding away watching from the sidelines

[GeorgePulchri]

I read this as I watch from the sidelines…

[RespectfulGuy]

There are about 6 billion humans on earth, hence about 3B are of the opposite gender.

And outside USA and Europe, there are two hundred or more countries.

Yes, we're more than just in the info age. That's Y2k. We're in the age of AI soon AGI.

And outside US and Europe, many still follow cultural religious lifestyle. One of which is upholding the notion of sex within marriage. Even in legal polygamous society, there is restriction on dating and intimacy.

When you widen your views to these 2 hundred or more countries, then you'll realise the answer is an affirmative yes!

And if you're looking at finding a mono relationship, then get off GaG and seek out real people and meet real people, all over the world. The reality outside GaG can be eye-opening.

[DishLady]

LOL. There have ALWAYS been good looking people out there. What does that have to do with monogamy?

[GeorgePulchri]

There haven't always been ways to be basically nude in public. Social media essentially makes public nudity possible since the screen creates a sense of distance and safety

[Nikki1989]

Obviously.

Look around you, people in relationships, everywhere.

[Nikki1989]

Note: Many people don't even use social media. I don't know anyone who uses Facebook, Instagram, or anything else.

[MrChinaski]

That would be the people without increased anxiety, depression, poor sleep, and low self-esteem. Seriously, the scientific evidence that social media destroys mental health, on average not everyone, is as strong and clear as that showing smoking cigarettes destroys lungs.

[Reapous]

Haha, not only is it more than just possible, but it’s still the norm! I just think you’re now more open to the idea of not being in one yourself— which is totally fine!

[Kabluie]

Non-monogamy is more normalized today, and even open marriages. It adds spice to the life and the partner's if its mutual. There is also the aspect that not one person has fulfill everything that interests you.

[Anonymous]

It's possible, but it's rare. If monogamy is important to you then do not tolerate ANY f***ery. One strike and she's out.

[Anonymous]

Yes, of course it's possible, and social networks are actually irrelevant to some people.

[In_Trance]

Of course it is

[GeorgePulchri]

how so? I'm not concerned about cheating, but what if your significant other feels insecure or is inherently less attractive than someone else?

[In_Trance]

Their potential insecurity is not your problem. If you accepted even for a short period then it becomes your problem... You need to make a decision on what you're willing to put up with or not.
Attractiveness is purely subjective. If you're starting a potential relationship and constantly looking around you need to take a look inside yourself and focus on your level of self-control

[GeorgePulchri]

I took a really cute girl to a restaurant once, and I really kinda liked her. She also had a lithe hourglass shaped body (I only mention for context). Nonetheless, I also noticed that there was a few other girls in that place (It was college town lots of friends and young adults males and females all hustling about naturally, nothing weird)
But I there was three times I recall I had to physically restrain myself from the reflexive impulse to glance at this one waitress who was a bit curvy in a different way about her waist.

I know I should be mature, and I have only discovered as an adult how crazy different the range of shapes and sizes mens and womens boodies come as when they are healthy and attractive.

I just got really internally scared because I had to fight myself because I didn't want to hurt the feelings of the girl I was eating with, and I also genuinely liked her as well, but werent kissing or active with each other or anything.

Any more thoughts?

[In_Trance]

I think you need to stop dating and find yourself a good therapist to sort through the issues that brought you to this point in life