So Guys, Is This Cougar Fetish Fad Over? What Started it Really?

[Valintina]

When I hit the dating scene 4-5 years ago, I had every 20 something on every dating site after me. I know I'm not a woman who looks my age, I'm told, and I'm not ugly or unintelligent or unfunny, I'm told. So that may have been part of it. However, was it a fad with that show Cougar Town? Is it something young men are really into still? And the last question, Why? I hear we're better in bed, less dramatic, blah blah. I'm not less dramatic, and neither are the other ladies that dated younger men. So, I guess long question short: Advantages to Old Bats as Opposed to Girls Your Young Age

Updates

+1 y

LOL - Clarification: Advantages/Disadvantages to Older Ladies and Advantages/Disadvantages to Girls Your Age/Younger

Updates

+1 y

I don't want way younger men, so don't think that's why I'm asking. Maybe 8-10 years younger if I have to and same age or older if they have some style and are a little more 'modern'. I don't want a guy with thick glasses a beard to his chest (I'm in Nevada) and a lumberjack shirt with cowboy boots, that's what I mean by that, lol.

[kataloso]

It became more socially acceptable, which made BOTH sides more open to the idea. Keep in mind with the cougar thing it's not just the fact that a guy might go after a younger woman, but also the fact many women may actually entertain the idea of dating a younger guy without the same type of worries of how it would be viewed.

I don't think it's a fad though. Things just gradually become more acceptable as our culture progresses.

[Valintina]

Well, 'long-term' regarding 'life-stages' it rarely works out with a way younger guy and older woman, but, interestingly, for way younger women and older men it can work better. I think it's a matter of financial willingness to make your 'offer' attractive by financial incentives as the older person. Women may be in less of a position to do so, or less willing.

[onlyaguy]

I doubt it is a fad. It may become more accepted and less discussed, but I don't think it will go away. I think it's a function of changing societal norms coupled with the fact that older women are generally more sexually mature and less inhibited...more on par with younger men in that respect. But generally just for fun, since younger men are less mature emotionally and not as compatible with older women in that regard.

[Valintina]

Yeah, I guess that's about it. It serves a 'transitory' purpose at a certain matching age for both parties guys in their teens/twenties women in their sexual prime...as far as a sexual match. Not much more.

[onlyaguy]

Thanks for the BA!

[Anonymous]

guys do that to everyone on dating sites. most guys view those as hook up sites. I don't know why guys like older girls and the same for girls liking old guys...no thanks

[Valintina]

Well, I don't know why guys like the really old, dried up older ladies..that aren't even stylish or anything. I can't stand old guys a little older than me that aren't stylish or cute. I didn't understand it when I was younger, but I tried it, and it was too weird with younger guys. Bizarre.

[Anonymous]

i think that show started it, I don't know why though it is quite demeaning..

[Valintina]

I think it's demeaning cause it's ONLY based on sexual attraction, like a self-made p*rn movie. I went on actual dates, and then tried it, I didn't just jump in the first night. It was weird. And they never ever left me alone, lol. Wanted a permanent hook-up, booty call to drop in on without an ounce of respect for my feelings. I got Mama Madea on them, Lol!

[Anonymous]

Lots of guys are into older women (mainly for sex I presume) and I don't think it was ever really a fad, its been around for a long time. I'd take a guess and say older women generally know what they want, and they are not afraid to go after what they want either as oppose to a lot of young girls who are unsure of themselves and sit around waiting for men to make all their decisions for them. Other than this I have no experience with older women and limited experience women in my age range (but I've come across a lot of immature girls though) so that all I can really answer.

[Opinion Owner]

Edit. I just looked at your pics. You look a lot younger than 42, maybe early thirties so it could also be a case of mistaken age?

[Valintina]

I'm my stated age, even on the dating sites, and all the photos current except for the semi-pro modeling one with the fur. That was 2008. What's a bummer is you can look younger in photos and your attitude, life experience and vibe can make you seem a little more your actual age. Most people think I'm 35. TY, that is a compliment.

[Valintina]

I meant face-to-face you seem older from another perspective besides a photo.

[westman74]

I honestly think it's normal for young men to want a more experienced lover who's body is fully mature. Every teen had that dream at one point. I find it creepy once a man is older and wants a teen so I can see why some women feel strongly against it.

[Valintina]

Well, I hear that many of these young men who seek older women, the preponderance, the mothers have abandoned them through divorce at when they were very young, turned gay, or passed away when they were young. These are the young men that actively pursue ONLY cougars. Some maternal connection, as weird as that sounds.

[Anonymous]

I like that older girls are less obsessive. They are more busy so they don't have time to focus all their energy feeling like you're their entire world. It cuts a lot on stupid drama.

They also got down from their pedestal and understand they are past their prime and more humble and interesting because of it (not all, some will remain vain and clueless until they die all alone)

[anon1111]

It's not a fad, it's been around forever. Even Benjamin Franklin (yes, THAT Benjamin Franklin) was openly vocal about his sexual interest in older women.

[Koldhearted]

who says its a fad?

never even seen cougar town, but I love cougars D:

you are very pretty for your age omg

[Valintina]

Yes, but I'm a meanie. lol.

[Koldhearted]

I'll put up with it for a few hours a week for a fling

[Dragan]

Girls at my age or a little younger are attractive for me. Mature women are often less inhibited and sometimes exude a special sex appeal. That excited some guys.

[Anonymous]

Older women are less expensive to date and easier to dump.

[Valintina]

True. Younger guys are better in bed, need a couple beers, 3 bucks, and you say don't let the door hit you on your cute little ass on the way out...

[Anonymous]

The "cougar fad" has been around for thousands of years. And, while it is not for everyone, it will never go away.

[Opinion Owner]

Did not like my answer?

[Valintina]

I didn't dislike it, no. :)

[Anonymous]

Lol definitely not a fad. Women want younger guys because they're better looking and can last longer in bed.

[Valintina]

Tru dat, but we have nothing to talk about. lol. Just twice I did that, it was strange, felt like I was in a bad movie about a naughty teacher with the local high school track guy. lol.

[Anonymous]

Yep

[Anonymous]

Nope

[Anonymous]

It's not a fad