My ex dumped months ago because she said she never loved me. In all fairness, I took her for granted and never said that I loved her. While the breakup was painful, it was amicable. Yet, I was hurting a lot.
2 months of NC went by and I saw her at an event (we have mutual friends) and while it was awkward and brief, it was civil.
A few weeks later we saw each other again and it was cordial.
Then a month went by before I saw her again. This time she went ice cold and even rude on me. Later, I found out that someone told her I was dating someone (I had in fact socialized with women and went on a few dates, but nothing serious). I was hurt all over again because I was hoping to keep thins friendly with the hopes of reconciliation.
6 weeks later (last night), I saw her and smiled. She did smile back, but soon left before I could talk to her. I think the problem was that she saw me sitting with an attractive female friend (my ex my not have wanted to talk to me even if I was alone).
But now, she certainly must think I am dating someone. I don't what to do now? I never wanted to contact her directly after the breakup because she was the one who dumped and I wanted to respect her boundaries.
Now, I feel that my only chance to get her back is to contact her, but my mind and my friends tell me that is a horrible move. I would just be feeding her ego (she told me once that she guys and ex bfs chase her all the time, which also made me reluctant to be like them) and she would reject me anyway.
Ladies, do you really get turned off if a guy you dumped chased you again, especially you thought he was dating again?
Would most women think I was being creepy? I did not approach her and want nothing from her at this point but peace and no hard feelings.
Would it have been better to ignore her completely.
I feel I did the right thing, but I am curious as to the women's point of view. Thanks.
Most Helpful Girl
well you admit yourself that you took her for granted and although she said she never loved you she might have just been saying that to save face or to see if she could hurt you because you a) took her for granted and b) never said you loved her.
so while imo she did the breaking up if you feel you are the one who did most of the screwing up and left her no choice but to end things then I see nothing wrong with you 'chasing' her as the dumper or at least being the one to make contact.
if she dumped you because she wanted another guy or it just wasn't working out and she wanted to move on that's different then it's all on her if she's interested to make contact first.
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