Online Dating: Shotgun Dating. Is it wrong?

[Anonymous]

In case people don't know what shotgun dating is... it's where you're talking to tons of people on an online dating site and you meet with maybe one a day for a date... so you're dating multiple people at the same time...

By dating, I mean, casual dates... nothing serious yet. You're not calling each other bf/gf... you're just going out together.

What do you think about this? Is it wrong? Or is it kind of like being the bachelor or bachelorette on tv?

Yes, it is wrong to date more than one person at a time

No, it is not wrong to date more than one person at a time

It depends (explain)

Other (explain)

[Izzy2102]

No not wrong at all. Particulary with online dating I think it helps a lot. Truth is you're not gonna have a great relationship with everyone you go on a date with, so going on dates with many different people increases your chances.

I don't think it's complicated either as blackid said. It's nothing to hide. I mean obviously don't go rub it under a guys nose, but as long as it's only a fee dates into the relationship, I think most guys would understand.

Personally, I always dated or at least was open to date other people until he asked or made obvious in another way that he wants to be exclusive

[Asker]

I think that it can get complicated... idk, I've never tried it! I might though. Some guy I met up with said he doesn't shot gun date... and would appreciate that I didn't either. I thought that was unfair of him to say. I hadn't ever done it and I wasn't sure if it was wrong or not.

I haven't really run into the problem of dating many people and then being exclusive with one! Hopefully that will be a problem of my future :)

[Enideqa]

No I say if you want to try it, try it, just be careful .

[WinterSolstice]

It's not wrong at all. Girls on those websites usually have incredibly high standards and hold all the power (they decide whether they want to continue the interaction, not us). Not to mention the flakyness etc. What are the chances of the average Joe getting a date by only messaging a few girls? Almost slim to none.

[Asker]

Yeah, some guy I was about to see said it was... but then I kind of wondered... I mean you're just meeting for the first time ish. Seems harmless I think. I think it's bad if you start to get serious with one and still date more than one. Obviously. Do guys not have good odds online?

[WinterSolstice]

When I tried online dating thing, ~one out of 20 girls would message back. Unless you're a 9 or 10/10, you have to jump through hoops to make a lasting impression (perfect profile and perfect message -- anything less and they'll ignore you). Exponentially more work than just walking up to a girl and saying hi. Not worth the trouble for majority of guys, in my opinion.

[Asker]

Wow, that's crazy. Is it weird that I message guys first?

[WinterSolstice]

Not weird at all.I think most girls message guys they're attracted to.

[Asker]

Can't believe I got into the online dating scene haha. So many people are so weird about it!

[Anonymous]

I try to set up multiple dates 90 minutes apart at Starbucks for the intial meeting. I can meet 3 girls in one night and it cost me about 24 bucks. Sure...I'm too wired on caffine to sleep that night..but its worth it. I get a few strange looks from Starbucks staff..lol.

[Asker]

hahahahaha that's fabulous. I haven't done it, some guy who wanted to meet me said it was wrong... then it got me wondering... is it really?

[Opinion Owner]

Why would it be wrong doing this while meeting all 3 people for the first time? I don't owe them anything. I'm buying all of them a $4 coffee drink! LOL

[Asker]

lol how do you get all of them to leave before the next comes!? That's pretty funny to imagine.

[Opinion Owner]

I say.."Hey..its a work night, I've got some things I need to take care of". "Thanks for the and fun time." "Good night"

[Asker]

haha and then walk them out?

[Opinion Owner]

Yeah..walk her to her car...then walk to my car. 30 min later...the next girl arrives. :)

[Asker]

hahahahaha. funny. any luck with that technique?

[Opinion Owner]

Yeah...I'm a master at first dates now! lol Cheap first dates that is. It's not something I can do all the time..I mean..it takes some serious scheduling, and luck to find and meet 3 girls I'm interested in all in the same night. I wondered about having them meet me at the same time...make it like a competition/ group interview. lol.

[Asker]

That is kind of hilarious! I should do this. I talk to so many guys on this site... I frequently forget about them when I start meeting up with just one.

[TheGodEmperorLeto]

If you're honest with them, it's not wrong, but if you're not honest about what you're dating like and leading them on or hiding from the other, then that's wrong.

[Asker]

Yeah, I agree with that. I feel like online dating is really interesting and sometimes complicated. You meet some interesting people... I like that people actually want to date though.

[blackkid4]

Wrong? No. Complicated. Yes. Worthwhile? Not in my opinion.

[Asker]

Simply put, I pretty much agree with you... might be worthwhile, might not?