Is a study date friend zone?

[Anonymous]

Good Lord, I hate to be asking this, but is a study date friend zone? I've been out of the dating game for like two years, finally asked this cute Ukrainian classmate to coffee. I suggested we meet up for coffee Thursday after her final class of the day in the evening, and she went, "I have an appointment then. We can make a study date."

Soo... forgive me, I've been out of this for a couple of years. Is that friend zone or casual date? I *think*she likes me, we've been flirting, the "grin at each other randomly, whenever one of us makes a funny comment, etc, walk with each other after class." I just don't know if study dates are like day dates--express lane to the friend zone, haha.

[harveykinkle]

No, no, no, no, no!

If you want to date her you need to ask her out on an actual date - not some vague date out of fear of rejection.

I've found myself in this position many times. Guy asks me to study (or bike ride, or attend a school event or something) and I think the point of hanging out is to do that activity while they think it's a date. We then have to have the uncomfortable talk a little later where I need to tell them I didn't realize they were dates and the guy feels let down :(

If you like her ask her out for coffee or dinner or to a movie so she is on the same page as you.

If you want to do a study date you need to make it known your intentions - that you'd like to get to know her better.

[Asker]

I did ask her out to coffee, she said she had an appointment and said we could do a study date. I suggested coffee/she counter offered study date.

[harveykinkle]

HMmmm. Interesting - that could potentially be downgrading the date... Well how about go on the study date then ask her out for coffee while you're on it. If she declines again she's not interested.

[Anonymous]

Yeah same as a day date, if you want to make sure you don't end up in the friend zone make sure you take her out at night, make sure its obvious you're in to her, and always end with a kiss (on the cheek or otherwise).

[serp777]

Nah that's like a classic movie strategy to get a more intelligent girl attracted to you

[LilKim]

Remember the study date on American Pie?

[Asker]

Never watched that movie, haha.