Dating a frat guy? complicated.

[Anonymous]

i met this guy and he is the president of his fraternity. he's really really sweet to me. he holds my hand and kisses me in front of his brothers and he doesn't pressure me to have sex with him. (im a virgin). his friends seem to like me and whenever they see me out in the gym for instance, they would text the guy I'm talking to and tell him I was at the gym, and stuff like that. I pretty much get along with his friends. the problem is we have been hanging out a lot lately but recently he has been busy with frat stuff. I'm trying really hard to be supportive but I can't help but feel like he isn't making an effort to hang out with me. am I wrong for feeling this way? and how do I give him the space he needs to do frat stuff and yet not make him forget about me.

also when we hang out, we usually watch movies and cuddle or he would take me downtown to the bars. I want him to take me on a real date. how do I tell him without sounding whiny?

lastly, how do you bring up "the talk" with a guy without sounding desperate? what does it mean when a guy says he doesn't know what he's looking for? and how do you respond to that?

[pickledxtofu]

You're not wrong, but you're also not understanding. This is why fraternity men tend to date sorority girls. They understand how time consuming it can be with study hours, chapter, dinners, brotherly activities, community service, meetings & conferences. They totally get that.

My boyfriend is in a fraternity & I'm a gdi. But I get that his fraternity is important to him. I usually see him at night and spend the night at his house. But I know that he has other commitments important to his life.

Ask him out on a date instead of expecting him to take you.

[Asker]

thanks I needed that

[Anonymous]

There's no easy way of having the status talk but you just gotta do it

[blackeagle007]

Be careful with frat guys, I once went out with a Sorority girl, bad choice! She was all about money, flashy, didn't work an honest day life. And stuck up as well. Frat dudes are no different, all they do is party and want to get laid.

I'm not trying to discourage you but...Just be careful

[Danielp1989]

"he dosen't know what he's looking for". smart. do you want to marry him?

[Asker]

no I just wanna date him

[Danielp1989]

u have be his friend first or make him chase before you give into him so that his sex stays attracted to you. the chasing game doesn't last long and its a double edge sword. there two types of men in that game the one who chases back and the one who runs both of them will leave if the chase is drag out to long unfortunately. there's a balance in the amout of attention you give a guy during the chase so be ALERT to his emotions. The firendship thing is usually good a, you can give into him early

[Asker]

i did that! he tried to make moves on me the first time we hung out but I rejected his kiss and we've been hanging out ever since then. I definitely let guys chase me all the time and he's no exception.

[Danielp1989]

He probably a ounces puppy. These types of men feel vengeful at the fact that they always have to chase girls so they go on the vengeful "I'm fuck EM all and dip." You need to show him love this is kinda tricky becuase you also dot want to give away UR intention.

[Anonymous]

Frat guys are almost always dating more than one chick

[Asker]

but I don't feel like he is because since we've been hanging out, we've been together almost always. except for recently with his frat stuff.

[Anonymous]

don't leave your drink lying around