These thoughts are coming back. I'm afraid I have an intellectual or low intellegience (IQ) issue. I feel dumb most days, like today I had to do simple math but I couldn't. Adding and subtracting. I can do it no problem on paper but to spit out information of mental math takes me longer. Because I overthink things, I always excelled at writing, I love writing. Math and science have always been tough for me. Maybe it's cause I missed a lot of school, I got placed into special education in 6th grade. I was in normal classes for history and writing, reading comprehension was tough for me but I have ADD. In first grade my mom would send me half days, and I'm sure kids talked.. they probably thought I was abnormal? I don't know. Maybe it's me overthinking. I've had my friends since elementary school so they probably knew something was off with me? I've always been quiet.
Maybe they weren't talking behind my back, but I don't know if my friends know something and aren't just saying anything? I'm not sure. They talk about kids from high school and how they thought they had LOW IQ. Are they saying this when I'm not there? Is this just my anxiety? I'm a CNA in the hospital, I was able to pass the CNA. my therapist said I'm fine It's just anxiety she said she doesn't think I have anything, my social skills are bad managing money is bad. I have to pay for stuff on the car to get fixed and I legit have no money. I always say I'm gonna save next paycheck but it never comes. I don't know. I'm so worried they think something is off with me and they are treating me like a friend cause they know?
I was in special education, so I don't know. I'm very worried about this. I'm 25, and have nothing going for me besides my CNA, passed boards in HS. I have issues with money, I'm a procrastinator too. I overspend, I pay rent at home. I'm still living at home. I wouldn't have a car if it wasn't for me paying it off to my mom. Cont in update box
