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Story of How My Friendship Crumbled Away

Story of How My Friendship Crumbled Away


So over the past 3 years, I saw our friendship crumble. It's a long story, so let's call her Jane.


Year 1:
Jane and I were random roommates during our freshman year in the dorms. We were shy, so we just stuck together. We got along so well that our dormmates thought we were the model of friendship: ate, explored the city, accumulated a bunch of selfies, and just did girl time together. At that time, she was my best friend.


Two quarters in, we formed a group of friends together. Three quarters in, she got a boyfriend and stopped hanging out with us. One day she left her laptop open, and I saw my name mentioned in a chat. She was complaining how she didn't have any close friends-- and her friend asked "Aren't you best friends with ---" And she said "No. She was never a close friend." That day, my heart sank, and the reality of our friendship hit me.



Year 2:
By this time, we were no longer close-- but we still roomed with another. Jane would work in the living room, despite having a desk inside the room. Her boyfriend would always be over 24/7. He was here in the mornings, after classes, and night. Regardless, the whole house liked him and I didn't mind him.


However with Jane, things went down fast as she started getting grouchy, short-tempered, disorganized, messy, and micromanaging. She would clog the toilet without knowing, leaving me to fix it. She would lock the door often when I was gone. She left piles of dishes in the sink, didn't do any of the chores in the bathroom nor help buy any toiletries, and threw her stuff everywhere. Jane stopped greeting and acknowledging at me almost completely. After the second year, Jane ignored me and I ignored her back.



Year 3:
Avoiding each other became a habit. She would be inside the room and leave when I entered. By this point, we stopped talking completely. There was tension between us-- and we never confronted it. I was afraid of confrontation, so I cornered my work area with a divider so that I wouldn't have to acknowlege her at all when she was in the room. I would leave through the back door instead of the front door, avoid going to the kitchen and living room because Jane was there. I felt suffocated.


So on a short notice, I opted out of our lease.That conversation was the longest I've had with her, and the scariest. She was mad, and I sat through an awkward 2 minute conversation of my move out details. After that day, we never talked.


After knowing I was leaving, she started to clean and contribute to the apartment. She removed the sign "Jane and ---'s room", changed the door lock, refused to sleep in the room, and started scavenging for items I forgot to pack and putting it on my table. I took those as a sign to gtfo.


Fast forward, today is the move out day. I'm sitting here remembering how our friendship crumbled. I realized that the basis of our friendship, was out of necessity of having to be together (dorm roommates/splitting rent). We never chose each other with our free will. As these three years passed, we grew apart. We are no longer friends, nor facebook friends (she just blocked me)-- but enemies. I resent her so much for scarring my roommate experience.


I hate her so much, but why am I crying so much.

Story of How My Friendship Crumbled Away
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