You Don't Need Everyone In Your Life

[Anonymous]

When I was younger, I wanted everyone to be my friend. Literally everyone. I thought if I'm friendly enough, and open enough, that's enough for people to just like or love me, but obviously that's not always the case. It certainly helps, but there are just people in life who will not get along with you, will hate you, and will put a cloud over your life. As you start to really mature and grow up, you start to realize that you don't need every single person in your life to be your friend or even your associates. You start to recognize that what you really need and that what's important is the quality over quantity of friends.

I put time and effort into the friends and family in my life that really and truly do care about me and have my back. They are positive and supportive of me and have helped me in more ways than I can count, but on the same token, just because someone is family, or once a friend, does not mean that I'm obligated to have them be a strong part of my life or in it at all. I think too many people get caught up in this blood is thick than water motto or once a friend, always a friend, but people do change, and life does change some people in very negative ways, and it's up to you to really decide whether you need that to become part of what takes over your life.

This also applies to the world of the internet. I've read so many comments in passing about people refusing to block people and such simply because they supposedly have such tough skins and what not, but they continue to have the same tired argumentative comment battles with the same people over and over again. I can only think of two reasons for that; either they're a glutton for punishment or these people are simply two tigers with the same stripes. The internet is filled with a sea of people you don't know anything about. Why do you need to be everyone on the internet's friends or invite everyone in to your world just because they make a comment or show up?

It's the same outside the internet world. There is nothing to be gained from hanging around people on a regular basis who are constantly negative, bitter, hateful, argumentative, continuously put you down, going no where in life, blaming everyone else for their problems, and/or drama filled. Those people serve one purpose, and that's to sap the energy of those around them. These people aren't constructive, or helpful, or meaningful. You don't need some sort of thick skin to help you survive being around them, but rather to rid yourself of their negativity and find more productive positive people to inhabit your world. And it's not even about being with super happy shiny positive people all the time, because not everyone has that personality, but they can have attributes and qualities that help you learn and grow as a person.

Life is already tough enough without you inviting people into your life that have no business being there or who aren't doing anything for you whether that be on the internet or with people you know in your family and friends. If you're in doubt in a relationship with family, friend, or even significant other as to whether they are good for you, you really should ask yourself in earnest whether you are benefiting from them being in your life or you'd really be better off without. Just think about all the time you spend dealing with that person and their mess and their drama, that could be better funneled into either personal growth or helping grow and maintain positive friendships and relationships in your life.

[LittleSally]

Oh, yeah, definitely true...
Don't let people pull you down. You have your own life to lead. Nice to remember that from time to time. Also - the older I get the less tolerant I am of other people's bull***t. Makes for some awkward situations, but I'd rather have that than having to put up with idiots for long periods of time.

It's worth it! xD

[America1st]

You are spot on! The only thing I would add is that we control our happiness, no one else. Deciding to let others have a negative effect is a choice.

[RasmusAiken]

People you consider friends should effortlessly bring out the best in you. Others will be toxic, predatory, evoke anger and negativity etc.
You can be kind and polite to everyone but friendships need to be guarded in a special way.

[Tiana_d]

I've realized this year, its better to have a few friends rather than a heap of kinda friends

[Fathoms77]

Oh yeah, I think we all eventually learn that we can't be everyone's friend. Eventually, you just become satisfied with having a few good friends and no enemies. ;)

[Library]

I wish it was that easy to block out everyone who I don't like in my life.

[myTake Owner]

Oh, no one said it was easy. For a lot of people it's a process that they go through from just wanting to have everyone in your life and racking up friends to really understanding over time who is really there for you and loves you and likes you for you rather than for what you can give them or what they can take from you.

[ToruMatsuda]

Yea true Good advice , letting go of some people is like stopped being effected by a poisonous cloud, but lol tbh you still need a few friends tho, can't be with the loner lifestyle forever

[myTake Owner]

Ha, I didn't say you didn't need somebody in your life... you just don't need "everybody" in there if they aren't someone who creates some sort of positivity, growth, love, or good friendship in your life.

[ToruMatsuda]

Ah my bad😅it was long read so I skimmed some of it😂