Signs you may have a Frenemy

Having friends is a good thing. Having true ones are a blessing. But sometimes we are so blinded by these so called friends that some of them don’t have your best interest at heart. Here are some signs to decode if your friend is a friend or an enemy or both.

Signs you may have a Frenemy

1. They don’t celebrate your success

Instead of celebrating it, they downplay your success by questioning how and why you got the job or title. Oh you got promoted? Instead of saying Congratulations! I am so happy for you! You deserve it. Or if you're looking good but they're going to say oh you look fatter. They just like to rain on your parade in stealth mode.

Signs you may have a Frenemy

2. They like to listen to all your sob stories

Anything that involves you crying or hurting or you’re in deep trouble, they are all ears and seem to enjoy every moment of it. They will console you by saying oh you deserve so much better honey but deep down they’re saying serves you right.

Signs you may have a Frenemy

3. They compete with you

True friends don’t compete with you in a menacing manner. But your frenemy races you to a promotion or who’s first in owning a house or race to the altar or have kids. They like winning as long as you are the one losing. But they cushion your loss by saying don’t worry better luck next time, friend. Meanwhile they’re celebrating your failure secretly.

Signs you may have a Frenemy

4. They copy you

Imitation is the highest form of flattery. They love to hate you but they hate to love you. They like what they see but they’re in denial that they unknowingly start mimicking your style, your taste and just everything about you. All of a sudden, they look like a replica of you. And people will notice that.

Signs you may have a Frenemy

5. They gossip about you behind your back

If they gossip to you about others, they will gossip about you to others. How do you know this? Someone else will tell you about them talking trash about you behind your back. But deny it when you confront them trash talking you.

Signs you may have a Frenemy

6. They lie to you and about you

When you catch them in a lie, they make it sound like you are making up stories to hurt their feelings and your friendship. They guilt trip you making it look like you’re a bad friend for even doubting them.

Signs you may have a Frenemy

7. They use your other friends and family against you

They manipulate your friends or families in believing lies about you and make you look bad in your love one’s eyes. Your love ones should know better who to believe in.

Signs you may have a Frenemy

8. They are jealous of you

They will have no problem saying; “You’re perfect! I am so jealous of you”. They compliment you but they mean it in a malicious way.

Signs you may have a Frenemy

9. They want your life

When people say they wish they were you, believe them. They wish they were in your shoes enjoying the good life they dream of having. They wish they have a wife and kids to go home to or be the go to person of the company.

Signs you may have a Frenemy

10. They say they won’t do you like that

When they say they won’t do you like that, they will do you like that. They are silently plotting your downfall hoping you’d lose your girl or your job or your house. There’s a saying “your best friend is your worst enemy.” This holds truth as you put so much trust in this person hoping they got your back no matter what but they end up stabbing you so many times, they left the knife on your back for their later use.

Signs you may have a Frenemy

What do you do when your “trusted friend” checks off all that is on the list? Do you confront them? Do you cut them off? Do you trust them with your life? It is so hard to say especially when they are so good in hiding behind that smiling in your face “I am your friend for life” persona. It is hard as well when you catch them so many times doing you so bad but because they have been a big part of your life, you just can't cut them off so easily. You feel torn because you think they’re family but what do you do when they do you wrong? Remember your enemies don’t betray you. Your friends and family do.

Signs you may have a Frenemy

Stay woke.

Thanks for the time reading, besties.

XOs Pinay_Ako


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Pinay_ako is a GirlsAskGuys Editor
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Most Helpful Guys

  • I disagree with 3 to some extent. Some of the best friendships I've had has been based on competition. Like you said though there wasn't anything menacing about it where i think the problem lies.

    Hell these friendships looked terrible from an outside perspective which was always funny to us when people tried to make us make up.

    I think the biggest red flag to me is when a friend is too nice, to me if your not teasing each other at some point you're not real friends, it just comes across as fake.

    Oh and if your family is taking your friends word over yours then your family us a bigger problem than the friend.

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Most Helpful Girls

  • In my opinion, I wouldn't say "frenemy" cuz it means that a specific person still cares about u a little but they also tick u off sometimes. About all of the lists u said, it sounds like those kind of people r backstabbing snakes, not really frenemies. Just my opinion

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  • Yo guy, you already posted this, you are reading it to me.
    You are so right, but in order for us to be happy we dont need these typle of people in our lives.
    Also its funny how you tick all of these boxes... lol jk

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What Girls & Guys Said

1319
  • 3d

    I've never experienced that before. I guess it's not common with dudes.

    A lot of the time, a woman will complain to me about her frenemy, and my usual response is: "Why do you keep associating yourself with this individual? Someone dies that with me, I either confront them, ignore ten, or just walk away. "

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  • 6d

    Frenemy or I like to refer it as toxic friendship. Most points are true.

    I forgiven her again and again and again.. Simply because I considered her as a family-friend. I had enough when her boyfriend at that time put the blame on me for her cheating behaviour.. I have my own life to deal with so I cut her off soon after. Cheating is her choice and her own fault.

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  • 6d

    Most of my friends are just that frenemies we are always waiting for each other to cross that line and stop being friends and in all honesty I am a goodhearted guy and a lot of my so called friends have used me when they needed me for something I try not to be that I really do but it seems like that is all anyone is good for.

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  • 7d

    I have had such friends, almost everyone I know from my high school has been like that at some or another time.
    Now whenever I come across someone from my class, I just talk to them for five minutes tell them how good I am doing and then leave. Oh yeah, I try to be as rude as I could be in a polite way😅

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  • Unfortunately , I have tons of frenimies... nothing wrong with a little competitiveness but I’ve noticed the more successful so become, the less friends I have.

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  • If anybody even gives you one bit of reason to doubt that they are your friend they are a frenemy or even worse

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  • Usually driven by envy & jealousy. I caught some of my "frenemies" red-handed and even got them to admit how badly they wanted to be me. Adios Amigas!

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  • He was never really a friend, but a guy I worked with drastically changed my opinion of him when I was in a bathroom stall and he came in complaining about me to a co-worker. I was on the throne and heard it all.

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  • I only have one great friend, you wanna know who he is? Myself.

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  • 6d

    I'd a bunch of fools for "frenemies" in middle school😩😖🙎

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  • 7d

    I think they do that because they're just jealous of who you are and secretly a part of them wishes they could be like you

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  • 7d

    I had a friend like this. Ditched him cold one day, all at once with no exlanation. Said if he came near me id fuckin attack him

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  • 7d

    Then I guess I got a lot of frenemies

    Nice take :)

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  • 2d

    Based on my experience, most of these points are spot on. I kick anyone out of my life once I catch them behaving like that

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  • 6d

    We’ve all been down that road keep your true friends close and let the others wander in an out

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  • 7d

    Well some those so-called frenemies have been my friend since childhood, no offense though

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  • 7d

    I've gotta ex girlfriend who is either frienemy or enemy she's an ass every day then begs ne to forgive her the next, I often end up confused

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  • Yup They Call them toxic friends , best thing to do is remove them from. your life

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  • they can never be both, that's only one you could trust

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  • Cut em lose n ghost them. Period. They don't deserve u or your time.

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  • I love articles about frenemies.

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  • 7d

    Wow. This reminds me of someone I know...

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  • Good take

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  • 6d

    Trust noone

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  • 6d

    Good

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  • Keep your friends close and your enemies closer

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  • I only have friends and enemies

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  • A lot of "so called" friends are just users.

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  • I’ve always had this well rub it in more.

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  • 6d

    Honestly it sucks to be in this situation

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  • interesting post

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  • l don't know what that means

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