I'm losing my big brother to his new girlfriend, what should I do?

[Anonymous]

I love my big brother, he means the world to me. And it's a long story, but unfortunately we don't get to live together. He has a new girlfriend now. And I like her, she's really nice and cool and she and I get along very well. Today I was around her and my brother. My brother called her sweetheart, which is what he calls me all the time. It hit me kind of hard, I didn't know he'd call someone else that too. I guess I should've seen it coming. But now I can't stop comparing myself to his girlfriend. And I know I shouldn't, because she's his girlfriend and I'm his sister, they're completely different things. But it's like he doesn't have time for his little sister anymore. It feels like I'm not that special. Ever since this happened, the word "sweetheart" keeps playing over and over again in my head and it makes me want to cry when it does. I know it's not gonna happen, but in a way, it feels kind of like I'm losing my brother. I don't know what to do or what to think. I shouldn't feel like this, and I don't want to. I don't know if I should try to push the feelings away or talk to my brother. If I talked to him about it, he'd think it's all his fault. And it's not, it's all my fault for feeling this way. I just don't know. Any advice, suggestions, or words of wisdom would be very greatly appreciated.

[MrQuestionaiire]

This is one of those things that I would actually try and say you should attempt to adapt to instead of trying to fix it. Be happy for him that he has a great new girlfriend. Sometimes being away from someone can strengthen your bond with them, making the next time you meet more special. Be happy that you have a relationship with your brother in the first place, (I dont talk to my own sister at all) Anyway, it seems that your very caring and almost like a mother to him, but a mother has to let her children go at some point. And so I would say that you should just support him and his decsions and be happy for him. And dont compare yourself to his girlfriend, no reason to do that because you've been in his life much more than her and you have more meaning and purpose in his life than her. Hope this helps!

[serious]

I understand how it is for you, but I don't think you should be worried or concerned. I am sure your brother loves you no matter what, so what if he has a girlfriend, you will always hold a place in his heart One suggestion I would give you please don't try to compare yourself with his girlfriend, comparisons are not good, each person is different.

[MargaritaPeach]

This is pretty common... brothers and sisters have a very special bond. Don't bring it up to him, aside from maybe throwing in a casual "hey, I've missed seeing you lately" at him the next time you see him.

It helps to keep one thing in mind... you will ALWAYS be his sister. Whether the two of you are under the same roof or not. She won't always be his girlfriend. Girls come and go; sisters stay.

Write about in a journal or talk it out on sites like this one. That will make you feel better. And make plans to do something with him sometime in the future. Bake him some cookies or make him some rice crispy treats or something. Do you get along with his girlfriend?

[LittleSally]

Oh, delicate subject. You are afraid of loosing him and he isn't even seeing it because he's wrapped up in this relationship he's now in. I say be happy you like his girlfriend. Also ask him to hang out with you from time to time without his girlfriend. 😊
Nothing you can really do - he's growing up... Just make sure he can always turn to you and try to help him znderstand you still need some hanging out time with your big bro. 🍕

[Anonymous]

You're not losing your big brother. He won't ever stop loving you no matter what.
You will always hold a special place in his heart. He may break-up, he may find someone else or he will keep being with her, but truth is that you are always going to be permanent in his life.
You don't have to compare yourself to her.

[LightsOff]

Ok your attachment to your brother is kind of creepy and sounds unhealthy, you should really see a therapist. It's not good to start comparing you to his girlfriend just because he calls her sweetheart. It's not the end of the world, you're really overreacting...

[zombiebabe]

siblings first!!! you're not losing your brother you will forever be #1 for him

[Anonymous]

Trust me your brother still loves you. But he just got a new girlfriend so he'll want to spend a lot of time with her.
Once the puppy love dies down a bit he'll probably start spending more time with you again :)

[SirenDep]

Tell him you want to see him often. And be happy for him

[TripleAce]

Pee on her toothbrush

[abundantlyrich]

See a therapist.