I think I've posted about this again but it's getting ridiculous. SHE TELLS ME TO DO SOMETHING, I DO IT, AND SHE'S NEVER SATISFIED. SHE THEN PROCEEDS TO TELL ME I'M LAZY AND I NEED TO GET OFF MY ASS WHEN I'M CONSTANTLY DOING SOMETHING FOR HER! 😤
i know how you feel. I used to despise my mother until i told her that i missed out on most of my social life because she was so needy. i cleaned the entire house 3 times a week, washed dishe, went grocery shopping, manged phone calls, repaired appliances, mowed the lawn, trimmed bushes, cleaned upholstery, washed all clothes, cook most meal (always breakfats and dinner), and i had no time for friends and barely any for sports. it might have been cause my dad left but most of my adult sisters still live at home and can't do anything. when i told her all of this she was a little shaken. i had even turned down an out of state scholarship to Harvard because she said she would lose it if i moved away. I eventually cut her and my sisters off (though i do still pay all utilities) and have moved out. A lot of people hate acting as a source of income because its inconsistant. But most high paying jobs are. You work a couple of good, buttload of money ones and quite a few bum ones, but if you play the savings and self advertisement right, you can accomplish it. If you are still in high scool, she can't really expect much more like moving out seeing as i barely pay for my own bills and am occasionally forced to do some unsavory things to pay for my family. it would be a big stink that may not be worth it, but you could take all of your earnings and get your legal papers and move out. There are plenty of shared housing opportunites and it sounds like you can manage.
Obey your mom. I'm a grown man and I still obey my mom when she tells me to do something when I visit her house.
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Anonymous
(36-45)
+1 y
I don't think anyone here is really going to take you seriously. If you're still in high-school, you owe her for the roof over your head, for raising you. And you're over 18. You could have legally gotten a job 3 years ago and started saving to move out. You can still attend high-school while living on your own.
There's really nothing you can do, because she's not doing anything criminal, and you may not know this, but she can legally control you until age 21, if you're still living under her roof.
While it is important for everyone in the family to contribute to household chores (which helps you grow as a better person, in many ways), exaggeration of anything starts to hurt. Gal, if your mum's demands are disturbing and behaviour is unrealistic, in my opinion you guys should see a Counsellor together. Believe me, this helps in building good relation within the family. Cheers. Wishing you the very best. 😇💕
Sounds like Mommy Dearest is beginning her Change of Life, She has Strife. Do as she wants and "Yes" her to Death while Living under her Rule of Tough Thumb, hun. And with doing the Cleaning and Things of this nature, you might just Learn during the Burn, something Here, dear. Good Luck. xx
because her mother made her do everything and now she feels like she shouldn't have to do that anymore at least that's what I got from my mom one day when she was yelling at me too do the dishes
I am sorry that you live with a toxic abusive narcissistic mother. This type of parenting is abusive and you deserve to be free and live on your own terms. The fact that you declined an amazing opportunity for school not shows that your mother does not want you to succeed in life. She will never change, but you can. I hope you are surviving. I have a similar mother who is never grateful and has NPD, BPD and OCD and I am her scapegoat. Studying psychology now and it helped me understand many personality disorders that can never change.
she's always been like this and it's gotten worse now that I'm older. regardless of what she says she's always pressuring me to work a shitty job (I have a job I'm an actor but I don't work often) so she says I'm a lazy ass grown man now
my mom is totally the same i can do somthing for her and i get it done pretty well but if i dont do it the way she wants it then i get yelled at. she also calls me lazy like a lot cuz i do it my way she just thinks my way is the easy way out of getting somthin done.😒😒😒
Get your arse out of you mums house ffs. Get working and get a place. She's probably pissed off watching her spotty, greasy son who she used to love sitting about watching tv all day and eating all her food. I was working at 15 in a different country and I had a beautiful girlfriend and plenty of pals. What have you done? Watched a whole series of game of thrones in one day?
I'll give you five reasons. 1. You fuckin live there 2. You fuckin live there 3. You fuckin live there 4. You fuckin live there 5. You fuckin live there
Obviously I read it. And yes do it. You clearly know everything about the ways of the world. Do it while you still know everything. I can't help it that this isn't what you want to hear.
I didn't say that but I know how to keep my fucking area clean and maintain it. yet because I live here I have to do every little fucking chore and even when I do it's never right. yet all the times I've stayed alone for long periods I can wash, cook, and keep the place clean with no problems at all
Oh my god you can keep a house clean like an adult. Gold star for you even though millions of adults do that everyday. As long as you live there and are under her roof, you abide by her rules. You are 18 so if you don't like it, move out.
I disagree. just because someone lives with me I'm not gonna treat them like a slave when they didn't even make the mess. I'm almost always in my room. And your acting like I do. nothing. I'm always fucking cleaning and it's ridiculous
Yeah the caps really makes your point across. I feel real emotion for you as I sit here with a blank stare on my face 🙄🙄🙄I'm smart enough to not have kids but if I was unlucky enough to have you for a son, you'd be my cleaning slave. Maybe your mom is lonely. Maybe you should sit down and oh I don't know, fuckin talk to her?
Yeah that will totally work with a woman who is crazy strict and still thinks raising kids like the olden days is the right way. She doesn't even believe in using the dishwasher! 😡 She can't see anything I do and complains about EVERYTHING
Then try talking to her instead of bitching on the internet. Communication is key. It takes me ten minutes to hand wash dishes for five people's meals so I don't know why you're complaining about hand washing.
... BECAUSE THIS IS A DAILY THING. AND DISHES AREN'T THE ONLY CHORE! RUNNING UP AND DOWN THE FUCKING STEPS, GOING OUTSIDE FOR SHIT SOMEBODY LEFT IN THE CAR, CLEANING THE FUCKING BATHROOM AFTER SOMEBODY ELSE GOT OUT. THE LIST GOES ON
SHE ACTS LIKE I DON'T HAVE A LIFE. I GET UP AT 6:00 FOR FUCKING SCHOOL AND SHE BOTHERS ME IN THE MORNING. I COME SHE BOTHERS ME. SHE NAGS ME ABOUT DOING HOMEWORK LIKE I DON'T DO IT AND COMPLAINS ABOUT ME SLEEPING AFTER SCHOOL.
I have a fucking job for your information. I'm an actor and my hours are long when I work. and that is better than dealing with her. No one is that demanding/bitchy and I would never take a job like that.
Good for you. I have a job too, like every other adult. I work on the neurosurgery unit of a large hospital. In this economy and Trump as president, you should be grateful for any job.
Yippee. My last job was at a nursing home. On average, I had 30 patients a night. How the hell am I supposed to keep 30 people alive, I don't know but I did it. One night insane night, I had 60 patients. I still worked and applied for better jobs and when I got one, I got the hell out of dodge. That's my advice to you. Learn to bite your tongue when you want to yell at her, look up money saving tips, and get the hell out when you have the money to do so. That's my blunt honest advice. This will give you good perspective. I have coworkers that bitch about having 12 patients and I just want to say, "try having 60."
thanks for the advice. and yes that sounds awful I can't imagine being in your position. unfortunately my mom is rather needy so I will be living with her probably throughout college 😥. I'm not a people person so unless I can get a single dorm I'm not leaving home.
Single dorms are a lot of money too. If you can pick your roommate you'd have to go through a strenuous roommate interviews. Like asking them to honestly answer if they're an introvert or not. And you'd probably be able to tell if they're an introvert or not. Save up money and find some people to live with.
She literally could not go to school because of her an abusive mother, and you believe this is normal? Her mother is a narcissist and she is a slave to her.
Dismissing her anger shows a lack of empathy on your side. She is living in an abusive toxic enmeshed environment where she she is treated like the scapegoat from her narcissistic mother.
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