Ex rebounded then came back, advice?

[Anonymous]

So after 3 months of no contact with my ex, having told him off, he texts me one night, then calls asking to come over and talk. He apologizes for arguments we had after the break up, things he's said, he takes responsibility for his part of the relationship issues as do I. Says he couldn't sleep after saying what he did. He had another dream about me. Mind you he rebounded in between. I had broke it off but knowing there was another girl bruised my ego Ill admit. We finally decide we are able to be friends. He tells me the feelings were mutual at breakup. (Ouch)

So clearly he wants closure, right? Or he's lonely, confused.?

Since then we've hung out three times. ALL initiated by him. First time was two weeks ago, grabbed a drink and talked. Then last week we went out and the next night he texted me telling me to come to the bar if I wanted. He would split my cab fare. And it was expensive. Turns out it was a classy place with valet parking and pretty girls. He was with a guy friend...why wouldn't he want to "Do his thing" and flirt? Why did he want me there? Weird. I'm trying to be just friends. Its easy with no obligation...but my feelings might be returning. Is it unrequited? Am I just a convenience? I mean...Im lonely too but jeez. And now I have a friend request from him on Facebook. But I'm wary. He texted me to tell me he had added me too. As if he hoped I would accept? Everyones saying he wants me back but he's torn over his rebound. I need some insight.

Updates

+1 y

An update: I'm trying to keep it simple and friendly but my feelings keep meddling. Mind you I don't speak up when they do.

Anyhow, he's still in contact and everyone is saying he wants me back. But I refuse to allow my mind to drift to such a spot. We are/were close. And now its odd being his friend. And only his friend. He told me he's going to stop talking about her (his most previous ex) and I wondered if he felt he was ranting, or that it was bothering me? I told him not to...(cont'd)

Updates

+1 y

stifle it if he needed to express it. And he said he didn't. The other day, he showed up at my job and offered to give me a ride home...while I was waiting with a friend for her b/f. Odd. A few days ago he texted me but I said I was going out with friends. And yesterday he came into my job. Just for a bite...but he ate little and took the rest to go. I'm thinking he's lonely. And nothing more. After all, he said he wanted to be friends. (Close friends mind you). Advice from guys is helpful. Thanks.

[reeltaulks]

Regardless of what he is doing keep your mind and your feelings in tact. Don't read into it neither try to figure out what he is doing. If you are confused ask him outright, what's up? But it's obvious he wants you back and he is trying to reel you in slowly but surely. More than likely he invited you so that his friend could see you, I can bet my last dollar he must have told him about you. It's not a closure thing, it's a reconnection thing because if it was about closure he would not have done all of the above after he apologized. It is up to you to do the right thing if you were not at fault in the break up.

[Asker]

Thanks. Nice to hear someone else (other than myself) say I should stop analyzing. I'm going to refrain from asking him. Now anyway. He's so communicative he could spill the beans eventually. He introduced me as his friend to his guy friend and an older (aunt like) woman. His friend asked me how we met. He was clueless. Right now I have a Facebook request from him. Don't know whether or not to accept it. Seems so sudden. Foolish but maybe there's stuff I'm not ready to see. Thanks for answering. :)

[sumina7]

Looks like he wants you back since he realized that he missed you.