Don't know what to do, feel like my girlfriend is asking too much of me.

[Brandon21]

Me and my girlfriend have been dating for 6 months now. Most of it has been away from each other because we go to school in different states and she went to Germany to study abroad for 3 months. Long story short, I'm back home (where she goes to school) for Thanksgiving. We've been doing a lot of stuff together, being with each other for almost all of the days I've been back. I agreed to go to her parents house for Thanksgiving a while back so that is 2 days of the week that I'm here that I'll be with her parents.

A few nights ago I told her I wanted to sleep at home, instead of at her place, she got really sad after I said this, wouldn't talk to me really, and would just not have any opinions about anything we did. So after that night I slept at her house again, and then last night I wanted to sleep at home again. I invited her to stay but she said it would feel awkward, which I understood. So I took her to her place and went inside with her. She just layed on her bed crying and I told her it was fine and that I would be back tomorrow to hang out with her. After I left, she told me that she didn't know how much longer she could do this and that the little time that she had with me, she had to share. I told her that I want nothing more than to be with her, but that I need to be home with family sometimes too. Then she said that my desire to be home was more than my desire to be with her.

I know I'm not wrong wanting to be home sometimes. Since I'm only home for a week, my time should be split between friends, family, and her. But I'm doing more than just splitting, I spend the entire day with her but then if I want to go home she jumps at me like I'm doing the wrong thing. I don't know what to do. I feel like me spending time with my family is crime to her and its not right and the second I try to explain that its important for me to be with family too, she pulls out the "I'm the lesser of the two" card. Any advice would be great!

[Amourdivina]

hello Brandon my advice to you is to tell her that you love spending time with her as well as you love spending time with your family. Tell her that if she was in your shoes you would understand her and not make her chose between you and the family because your family is equally important to you. She's having a hard time being away from because she feels insecure for the reason that she would want you to feel the same way as her. She wants you to show her that you're crazy for her by wanting to be with her all the time. Tell her that by her feeling or thinking that way its not considering your feelings or you need to spend time with your family as well. Tell her that by her doing this is making you feel guilty for something you shouldn't have any guilt on doing. One way that you might make her understand this a little bit better is by telling her that you would want someone who understand your needs. You want her to be fair and also see what would make you happy because you try to please her the best way you can, but that she also has to show that she can sometimes understand your feelings too.

[Shlei3]

You are right. Spending time with your family is completely acceptable and understandable. Now why is it awkward to spend the night at your hose and yet it's not awkward for you to spend the night with her in her house? If it were me I would spend some time with my boyfriend and his family. I would even spend nights and leave him with his family during the day for a while. I am one of those little sisters that can't really see her brother due to a girlfriend that is very needy. I like her and all but she's just so demanding. I would sit her down and tell her that her manipulating you by saying she's number two is not right. In my personal opinion, as long as your family have been a rock for you then they should be priority. If she says you don't love her then tell her "I'm sorry you can't see that I do love you very much".

[amaya]

Invite her along and if she refuses then its her loss. I'm guessing her desire to be with you is to the point where she wants you all to herself because of all the lost time.

[l-hedoniste]

She sounds really manipulative to me. She cries and pouts because you want to spend time with your family and friends? Give me a break.

Your mistake is explaining yourself. You don't have to explain why you're spending time with your family; you do it, she deals. If she needs an explanation on why you need to see your family and friends while you're in town, then you don't need this girl.