My boyfriend told me that because he grew up with his father, he is a difficult person to live with and he tries to be nothing like him (jealous, thinks he is always right, selfish, moody). He likes to control everybody's life, asking many questions about the simplest things, always trying to find the bad and negative things everywhere. My boyfriend is a very down to earth person he doesn't let anything get to him or destroy his mood and thats a characteristic that makes his father even angrier when he tries to argue with him about stuff that he doesn't agree with. Today I got upset because my boyfriend and his father were alone and they started talking about me, he was asking my boyfriend if he is truly happy with me, that he doesn't like how I speak with my boyfriend and I'm too rude and always look angry and mad with my boyfriend. My boyfriend defended me and said that I'm only rude or shout when he annoys me and that he likes annoying me and he is really happy with me and we are doing great, but his father continued saying that that's not what he sees and that I have to control myself and not be rude. I'll admit I'm not a saint I do get annoyed easily and I can speak in a higher tone with my boyfriend sometimes when he does annoying stuff and only when I speak louder does he listen, but that's something that my boyfriend knows about me and he doesn't get offended about it. Am I an asshole for feeling angry with his father, I don't like people getting involved In our relationship when we are doing so great and we didn't ask for any advice. I feel like his questions were not out of interest for my boyfriends future or out of love, I feel like he wanted to make my boyfriend feel that I'm not good enough, I don't know how to explain it.
Is my boyfriends dad toxic or am I overthinking everything?
