My little brother who is 7 is getting bullied at school he's come home telling us he hates his face, his hair, his teeth, he is sure of himself and we don't make fun of him for his looks, I don't know what to do this is really depressing bc he is a really sweet kid and I love him so much
Watch some Comedy Central Roasts with him. Help him learn that he has a choice about how he reacts to the dumb stuff other kids are saying. He can be angry or sad, or he can laugh it off. If he learns to laugh it off and return the jabs, he’ll likely make friends of the people who are “bullying” him, especially if he can actually be funny.
Also, ask him from time to time about things he’s proud to have accomplished. When he’s feeling down, remind him of those things and other things you’ve noticed that he’s good at. Don’t overdo it or it comes off as contrived.
He’s a little young, but when he’s not so overwhelmed with the bad feelings, you can ask him why he lets other kids hurt his feelings. What is it about them that gives their words value to him? Are they or were they his friends? Does he want them as friends? If you can get to the bottom of that you might be able to help him solve the root problem.
If it persists, talk to your parents about getting him into a martial arts class or another sport or group that will help build his self esteem, confidence and social skills. Particularly anything that can help him defend himself if more reasonable solutions don’t bring an end to the nonsense.
I disagree.
Two ways, one isn't foolproof and won't work long term, the other works long term, but takes a lot of work, self-reflection, and probably can't be done at age 7. The first way is to act like the bullying doesn't affect you. Bullies are like sharks, if there's no blood they can't track you. If a bully doesn't see his teasing have an effect he'll move on. Bullies need to see that they're affecting their target, that's how they feel power. The other way is to love yourself. This is difficut because you have to recgonize your faults and accept them as part of you. You have to define who you are to you. Once you love yourself the words of others can't hurt you. You've described what and who you are to you, and what someone else says won't hurt. Since you know what is true, their words are less likely to hurt as most of what bullies say are lies. People have said that I am not particiuarly attractive. When I said that someone on here wasn't that attractive (not intending to be mean), she responded that I wasn't either. I responded with "I know". I wasn't offended because I'm balding with a twice broken nose, pale eyes, and mild eczema. To me that isn't attractive, so if someone says I'm not, that's not an isult because I agree. Insults don't affect me, because they're just flat out wrong. You can say that the sky is red and that's a lie. So if you say something that's a lie about me, that doesn't affect me.
Did you talk to the teacher? How are your parents handling this? Since you are still a minor.
as an older sister…you can tell him/show him his greater qualities at home or at any other family settings/outings…
Use every opportunity to tell him what he is good at.
yiur drawing is so cute. How did you figure out how to do this math problem so fast? You are so smart! You are the best brother! I am so lucky to have you…you always help me. Let me give you a hug. Let’s have ice cream.
in addition…also teach/tell him no matter where he goes…what he does…there will be mean people out there…”you can learn to stand up to them by saying … that’s mean and it’s call bully, it’s not nice…I will tell the teacher. “
continue to talk to him daily about how he respond when being teased.
that’s all you can do…
let me know how it goes.
Aww first I would just make him feel loved and appreciated, let him pick something and say he has good taste, let him teach you something and tell him he's smart, tell him how handsome he is, if he wants any advice from you about what clothes you suggest or anything like that try to help him that way.
Second do your parents know about it? I would see if I could get one of them to talk to the teacher, especially if you know the bully's name, you would really be helping both kids, being a bully will not be good for the other kid later. Good luck!!
Opinion
39Opinion
Use logic. Be immediately suprised, even shocked, say things like "why would you think that about your lovely face" smiling all the while at him. Let him pour out whatever dark thoughts he's having or have been told him. As each one comes up, laugh at it. Take lots of photos of him.
Now, if he has some kind of deformity or serious disfigurement that is recognised medically; Then don't do that, the above is assuming a normal healthy your man who has a more quirky look which isn't typically the one seen as the most handsome. If there is a genuine issue, you need to explain the world to your brother, explain how people often fail to see beyond the surface of people, but what matters is what he is as a person and how he treats and interacts with others. Tell him to, for every nasty comment be nothing but nice to everyone, tell him to find the beauty in everyone an especailly look for the heart within shining out by good deeds and caring actions and explain its power to overcome any uglyness outside.
I was bullied all the time growing up. I’m thankful that I had two things to help boost my confidence.
1- I took a Kung fu class. It taught me confidence and how to defend myself. The only times I used it was when it was really called for; when a bully thought it was funny to put his hands on me.
2- I had two older beautiful sisters that had my back. Everyone saw me as a nerd but nobody knew that the varsity dance team had sleepovers at my place most weekends. Not only were they were all nice to me but my sisters knew the bullies older siblings. So when my sisters told their older brothers or sisters what their little siblings were little assholes they would give them a living hell at home. That helped SO MUCH.
Honestly you sound like a caring older sister for your bro. Just be there for him and talk to him. See if you know any of the bullies names. If it gets REAL bad have your parents get a hold of the bullies parents.
Most parents have NO CLUE how much of a little shit their kids are and will gladly deal with the matter.
Talk to his teacher. They need to be the ones to stop it.
If they don't...
Your parents need to take it up with the principal. The board of governors.
I was bullied with words. I was a ballet dancer from age 3 to age 20. It's "unusual" for a straight teenage boy to have as a hobby. I loved it. Had to quit because my knees didn't like me being 180lbs and dancing.
Your alternative is to teach him how and where to hit so he can win a fight. It'll only take one. And it doesn't mean a literal physical altercation - although that won't hurt - teach him how to respond so he can score a win in his head. That's the only way.
You can't fight it for him. He needs to fight it himself.
The best you can do is to keep being a great sister to him, and being there for him and telling him the truth. Your parents should be the ones who arrange for some action to be taken at the school. While some say to do self defence classes, even if he learns to fight, the bully will not fight fair making self defence a bit difficult. But going to self defence classes can help to meet other people and socialise so that more people can help him understand his real worth.
I wish I knew what to tell you. We handled things differently when I was growing up. This is a new kinder more gentle (soft) generation. I was never someone that gave a shit what somebody else said. It's not just your brother it's the last two generations are so soft and butt hurt at anything somebody says. It started going off the rails around 2000, I knew we were headed for trouble when they rewrote the little kids prayer before they went to bed. Original: (As I lay me down to sleep, I pray the Lord my soul to keep. If I should die before I wake I pray the Lord my soul to take). New (soft) version As I lay me down to sleep, I pray the Lord my soul to keep. {Angels watch me through the night, and wake me with the morning light. You can talk to him try to lift his spirits, reassure him. My suggestion is start him in MMA classes and it won't be long until he handles his own business, and won't take shit from nobody. Good luck
find something that builds him up like a strength or something he´s good at. I think the most important for him is to get the focus of he hates and instead find his strength and his abilities.
I was bullied at school to because I was the worst boy in kind of every sports activity what helped me was finding out that I could understand complex ideas better than other boys gave me strength and self-confidence.
maybe try to tell him that they only keep saying that stuff because they see they can get a reaction from him. If he can learn to stop reacting to them, they might stop. They also might make things worse, and he'll have to talk to a teacher about it.
You need to teach him that other people's offensive words don't actually mean anything and doesn't change who he is as a person. Everyone's bodies go through awkward stages or "different looking" stages. It's a normal human experience and he shouldn't hate himself for it.
someday karma will catch up with those kind of people and in life when someone is a bully there's always a bigger bully. i can't begin to tell you the amount of times people have tried to bully me only to be bullied back because they thought they could bully a victim when in fact they were bullying a bigger bully and when they realize it they start to either panic or act more tough and it becomes a battle of the ego. life is a really fucked up thing and it's better he learns to defend himself now rather then later. and sometimes words don't always help. he's 7 get him into martial arts like karate or tae kwon do or jui jitsu or aikido or krav maga something where he can learn to physically defend himself hell even kung fu because if he's dealing with bullies at age 7 he's going to need all the martial arts training he can get for later in life
Boy, bully's become doctors
The main problem here is he's being bullied this has to stop in my experience telling the school won't help he needs fight back and you need to help him.
His confidence will improve after this is finished and his self esteem is low because he's being bullied.
just keep reassuring him. tell him or show him every little thing you love about him, you can get your whole family to do that. maybe plan a little surprise day or afternoon after school for him
maybe just make him go with it. because at 7 i think he's not gonna be able to really understand that other peoples opinions don't matter. so maybe make it about accepting the things they say. what if he was ugly? what does that matter? being pretty isn't the ultimate goal of his life. help him find goals to strive for that they can't take away from him.
I was bullied so much In school. It got so bad Near the end of elementary school. My dad took me to school on his Harley Davidson. He made sure to show his support your local hells angel stickers. Made sure the kids saw it. Word got around maybe it wasn't a good idea to mess with me because of who my dad is. I didn't get bullied the rest of the year. Until I went to high-school and found a new group of bullies... who bullied me.
sadly you can't. been there, done that. and when you're out of the school, the world gets even uglier. as hard as it is, just have to try to ignore the bullies. have you ever ignored someone? once you stop reacting, they give up. all they want is a reaction out of him.
also, i feel so bad for him. he's only 7 and already getting bullied. the world sucks!
tell him not to listen to the bullies, he listen to those bad bullies he will believe anything they say, he will hate himself. what he thinks of himself is most important then what other people think about him. teach him how to stand up for himself using words. my martial arts school have a program, we teach kids how to defend against a bullies with words only. you should try to find a program like that
You have to assure him that everything the bullies are telling him are lies and that they truly hate themselves but taking out their own frustrations on him.
Otherwise, go ahead and give 'em a dose of their own medicine.
It’s good to make home feel loved at home. Then bring it to the teachers attention. Also it’s good to help him feel confident in his looks. Next maybe get him to spend time around kids that have better values and less spite in their heads.
Public schools. He basically is spending 8 hours a day in prison. Get him out of that system and you'll see a change. Keep him in there and you'll get to watch him slowly turn into what prison turns people into.
Get him into a martial arts class. They are designed to build confidence in people. He will feel much better about himself.
I agree, got a lot of confidence doing Taekwondo which helped a lot.
@BlurryHaze Definitely. And you get a base of friends there. It’s good to have separate friends away from school.
@dustybiker Even to have the chance of making friends if you can't in school is great.
@BlurryHaze I agree.
Have your parents or guardians go to school and tell them if the bullying doesn't stop your parents will file charges against the school district sorry your facing this with your brother he doesn't deserve this at age 7
He need to practices karate and learn to answer with courage, if the stupid kids say something like you are so ugly he can answer shut up pygmy, your mouth stinks like dog. Then he have to go with the teacher and tell what happen. Another solution: go with the kids and say if you mess with my brother, you'll mess with me and your mom have to talk with their mothers
Nothing you can do people don’t change and If your brother believes them then That’s it.
Move on with your life as if He’s not getting Bullied because that’s all you can do.
You can’t. He has to stand up for himself. Last thing he need is sister kicking ass of people he can’t handle. They will crucify him
No i don't want to fight them I want to help him belive he is worthy, loved, and handsome
He should join judo or self defense class, he is sad because he knows he can't defend himself not because these words actually hurting him
This is not the best but still good advice from me that i used to apply when i was bullied back in HS: I bully them back to the point they get tired of it cuz it makes them feel like a fool.
Also u gotta pretend to be brave to stand your ground until u finally forget that you're just pretending as you're stomping on their egos
Ask him who's saying the stuff and talk to the school. Kids need to be punished for hoe they are treating their peer.
Go to his school and have a talk to the teachers or principal. That would be the best approach to go for...
still figuring this out for myself. I would say "tell him to ignore them", but that's hard for kids
Kids are not like adolescents. They really expect some kind of appreciation. And they really take insults or something of similar nature seriously. They, hence, need to be handled really carefully.
You have the explosive way and the systematic way.
Explosive would be to confront the bullies directly, systematic being talking to the management at the school.
Try systematic first and then if it doesn't work then explosive.
Build him up tell him the truth tell him that this happens to everybody they’re just haters when they get older they will mature and they will change right now ignore them
Get a couple of friends and stick up for him. There's one of him and 2 or more bullies or however many. If you show up in numbers it ends real quick with no altercation.
Yet again horrible advice
@Calenderagressive You're a sibling stick up for your family.
Ur 14 you would get away with slapping some 7 year Olds around real talk, tell them next time they mention his face you gonna make their face turn black and blue
Amen 🙏
Teach him how to knock their teeth out. He might get suspended for a few days but few people will mess with the kid who throws a good punch.
Visit his school, talk to the teachers and principal. If any teacher is hitting him or molesting him, call the cops. If his class mates are bullying him, talk to their parents.
Hey listen? You tell your parents and teacher's? This could damage his mind for the rest of his life and make him suicidal? Make sure you do this Sis? And your a little hero?
Take him to a good dojo for a few years and that will solve the problem.
be there for when he comes out of school let him walk by you the folow behind and see it's what I done it helps as surport with get involved
Get him into doing physical exercise to improve his physique and muscle mass. Have his dad teach him how to throw a punch.
At 7, I think you can start learning martial arts, I heavily recommend it because it builds confidence and his body!
Martial arts or just find something sporty to get him started building confidence.
Talk to your parents about enrolling him in a self defense class. And ask them to complain to the school.
get him into a martial arts school to start training
Sounds like he needs confidence somehow. Tell him punch out the next kid who does it.
No, teach to fight first otherwise he's losing
@Calenderagressive waste of money. Upward thrust with palm into the nose. Boom done.
Nah boxing is way better
@Calenderagressive right every fight is a John wick fight.
No, i mean boxxing is easier
@Calenderagressive i have taken some classes and I like it. That bag becomes a fckin villain….
Oh I'm just good (aka cries because I've never boxed in my life)
@Calenderagressive I wasn’t very good. But the bar fights I’ve seen are just idiots swinging wildly
I'd honestly go to his school and probably wild out I'd beat those little kids up😋😋😋
Tell him to start working out. If he'll have a goal, he'll be less bothered by people.
Your parents need to talk to the school.
Tell him that story about Golias and the small boy
Set the Bully kids house on fire.
Tell him to beat someone up. Just someone.. anyone
You might have to take him out of that school.
Tell him to break some fucking noses lmao
Teach him to hit them, worked for me
Best get help before 18
Aim for the nose
You can also add your opinion below!
Girl's Behavior 
Guy's Behavior 
Flirting 
Dating 
Relationships 
Fashion & Beauty 
Health & Fitness 
Marriage & Weddings 
Shopping & Gifts 
Technology & Internet 
Break Up & Divorce 
Education & Career 
Entertainment & Arts 
Family & Friends 
Food & Beverage 
Hobbies & Leisure 
Other 
Religion & Spirituality 
Society & Politics 
Sports 
Travel 
Trending & News 
