Family & Friends

How would you feel/act in this situation?

So I was talking to my dad a week ago and he brought up me coming out there for Thanksgiving (he and basically everyone else on his side of the family so my other siblings live out there with him in Texas). I asked if my boyfriend could come to which he said sure as long as he pays for his ticket and that he would even book the flight for us. He then changed his mind saying that we should book the flight. Now after thinking about it I don’t want to go because in reality my dad’s side of the family kinda ignores me (I’m the youngest). They have never really actively called me or visited. If my siblings visit they don’t tell me anything but they will tell my brother and if I ask my dad to visit he’s always working and doesn’t have the time. The last time I saw my dad’s side of the family was 4 years ago when they drove up here to get my other sister and we decided I would go with them for 2 weeks. I ended up stuck out there for 2 months. I’m not sure how to feel but hurt and angry again. This isn’t the first time my dad or his side of the family has made excuses to either not talk to me or see me. I’ve had this argument with them before and we agreed to let the past not affect our future relationship but that’s clearly not possible for me when it feels like I don’t even have a relationship with them. They even go to my brother to figure out how I’m doing even though they have my number and could just call or text me.
How would you feel/act in this situation?
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Texas