Why does my mother always buy me clothes that are too big for me?

[Bethany22]

Is she genuinely that forgetful or is that a sign of a toxic mother?

[Cynicaldreamer]

My mom does the same thing. I used to wear relatively large sizes (12-14s) until I lost weight. And even though my mom is well aware I can wear smalls and mediums now, she still buys me larger sizes. Why?

Habit. That and she doesn't know what my exact size is. So she rather get something too big, than the wrong size that's too small. I don't mind. I just gently remind her of my actual size, or just say thanks and not wear what she got me. I suggest one day you go shopping with your mom and just 'happen' to try on clothes when you go out. Make sure she sees you in some outfits that fit you properly and tell her your size so she sees how you look in said clothes.

If she's still buying you clothes that are too big after that, then yeah, I might assume she's being toxic, or assuming rather you be in clothes that are too big than dressing sexy/too tight.

[dustybiker]

Enjoy it. You’ll miss her and her quirks when she’s gone. Trust me.

[QuadDamage]

Indeed!

[dustybiker]

@QuadDamage 😇

[dustybiker]

Thanks for mho

[PizzaPieMamaBear]

I don’t know that’s strange! Maybe she’s forgetful! I don’t know your relationship. It reminded me of one time my husband brought me really beautiful lingerie a Teddy with push up cups really beautiful I loved it it came in like cup size. He got me it in a 34C 😭😭😭 I was like you wish are their implants in that gift box too lol

[CubsterShura]

My mother doesn't do it a lot but my father does, he thinks that getting something big is key to being modest and not show the body. It's not true lol.

Try to set a boundary with your mother, I set one with my parents as sometimes they buy me stuff I don't want/like and they keep insisting that I wear it. I told them 'you can buy something for me, but if I don't like it I'm not going to wear it and it will be sitting in the wardrobe being untouched'. So far it helped.

[Truthatanycost]

It's often a sign of toxicity and projection. I've seen this behavior before. It's also a possible sign of inability to see reality and / or truth. The manipulation works well because the person in question starts to think it's an accident, forgetfulness, habit, or that she is simply unsure. Accepting the behavior then allows the toxicity to continue without challenge. Thus the manipulation works well.

[Kori1236]

Maybe she’s unsure. I personally like bigger clothing like graphic tshirts and hoodies because I can just burrow in them. For example I wear a medium sometimes large depending on the fit around the boobs but the sweater I’m wearing right now is an XL goes passed my butt and is just so warm. You could go shopping with her and pick out clothing you like that fits you and maybe she’ll remember or you can ask her why she gets clothes for you that are too big.

[FunkyMonkee]

Either she figures you'll eventually get bigger or she's giving you a sign that she's hoping you'll get knocked up and give her grandchildren and you'll need bigger clothes during the last few months.

[Static_In_The_Attic]

I’m going to guess on this one & say if she buys you clothes that are too small you might think you are fat & if she buys you clothes that are too big you’ll think you are skinny.

[mobiusforniner]

My mom does too. She gets me XL when i wear M. Her rationale? Its comfortable.

But i dont like looking like a deflated blimp

[SamK20]

Hey, it's better than them being too small, at least you can still wear them 😂


.. She could be that forgetful, might not really care enough to get things as close to your size as possible, but might care enough to still want to get you clothes, or she may be trying to purposely offend you, hard to tell.

[RealMarek]

If she’s toxic in other ways maybe it is that, but otherwise I would not entertain that conclusion. Perhaps give her your measurments/sizes or simply exchange the clothes for ones that fit if you can.

[NathanDavis]

is she the one buying all of your clothes?

or are these gifts that happen from time to time? maybe just tell her to get you other stuff that do not require a fit

[RavVid]

Maybe she never go over buying clothes you would grow into when you were a child. Does she know your size?

[Bethany22]

yes she does

[RavVid]

Is your mother now of an age and shape that causes her to wear loose clothing and maybe buying that for you? Perhaps she thinks left to your own devices that you show the shape of your body too well.

I've known mothers to be jealous of their daughters too, so maybe she doesn't want her daughter to look too trim.

Could you make her give you the receipt then change them for the right size? Other than size is the clothing she buys you would happily wear or too daggy?

[TroyDT2]

Maybe she buys clothes that she wants and figures if they are too large you will give them back to her. In that way she can say she gave you a gift, and still get out of having to actually buy a gift for you.

[Mmmariaxc]

Does she prefer to wear looser clothing herself because that might be how she thinks it’s supposed to fit.

[slatyb]

Feels toxic to me. She's not listening to you, showing you that she doesn't care much what you want.

[Aaron03]

I feel like she’s forgetful. Obviously I know the dynamics are much different with a mother/daughter than they are a mother/son but even my mom when she buys me clothes they’re always at least a size too big

[Sixgunsound]

Is she suggesting that you should be in a state where you would need bigger tops or something?

[purplepoppy]

Don't worry you'll grow into them 😉
She probably forgot you stopped growing years ago.

[midnightmoon05]

Send her a shopping list with your size. Hope that helps

[Guy13]

She wants to keep her baby at home. Take them back and get the right seam fit….

[AviatorTom]

It may be her way of dealing with her belief that she is bigger than she would like to be.