How to deal with toxic/controlling/homophobic mother?

[runitupkai]

Ok, So I have a mother. She is in her 50's and all she does is control everything. I'm about to be 17 and I can't wear makeup, go out with friends, get a job, or even do the permit test that I've been begging to do. I can't be on social media, and I can't have a boyfriend apparently after she said and I quote "grades before boyfriends" which my grades were up at the time. I'm not allowed to wear the clothes that I want which are not even revealing. I can't have a phone now due to me breaking these rules but I'm not able to do anything I want. She doesn't like my friends at all and likes to bad mouth them by calling them the B word etc. She also likes to ab^se me emotionally, physically, and mentally and CPS had to beg her to give me therapy which I am receiving. My friends have been there to witness these things but I'm too scared to leave the house. one because she has my college funds already together for me 2 because I have a dog and 3 because I'm living in a decent house without a lot of things other kids don't have. But I have no control over myself whatsoever. I have no idea what to do and I'm only putting up with it just so I can make it to college I do love my family dearly but If I get taken away they will all hate me and I don't want that. She also doesn't like my online friends who I know are not weird old men but actually teenagers whom I've video-called before and I've known for a while and she tries her hardest to keep me away from them at any cost. she's also broke my phone which was an iPhone 12 mini all because she found out I was dating a woman who I broke up with before she even found out. She would call me names because of that but I've changed and now I like men. But I use any pronouns but prefer he/him and she doesn't like the fact I changed my name to Kai at school. Which I only did because the school never gets my name right. Any opinions?

[petitedollbabee]

Tolerate it as best you can for another year, and then get away when you legally become an adult. Unfortunately it’s one of those situations where you think that you know best and she thinks that she knows best and therefore you’re going to butt heads constantly. As you said, you’re almost 17, so not long to go now before you can leave. What I’m wondering is, if she’s physically abusing you, why have you not called the cops? Gathered proof to use against her etc? Emotional abuse is one thing but physical abuse is a whole nother level.

[runitupkai]

I have called the cops and theyve just didn't do anything and cps has been to my house like 4 times already. They just recently closed my case because they think everything is fine now

[Kaneki05]

I mean once you go to college you'll be fine. Or just leave now, book it. Look into ways of getting support and social care for a place you'll be surprised that things just tend to work out.
I thought the same thing about my mothers oh I have heating and a nice room it's not that bad. But ya know what since she sent me to a cell for a night on a false charge, and kicked me out of the house I've never been so relieved.

One of my ex's she had her own place since 14 they gave her a little apartment, because yeah extreme family issues and been kicked out herself. Government just pays for her living really. Obviously she's not wealthy and for sure poor but she has a bed, a kitchen a bathroom the essentials of life.

[ChicoFromThe305]

Wait until you go to college and you'll have all the freedom you want to have

[rosemilk]

that is rough! been there! i don't understand how parents don't realize that they are actually pushing their children away, basically forcing them to rebel, and once they grow up and are finally out, they wonder why they don't hear from their kids like, ever.

i know there is no way to change a mom like this. it will only end up in argument after argument. she may think she is only trying to protect you, which i can see. but she is doing it in the completely wrong way.

just gotta hold your tongue and wait to go to college, as hard as that is

[MemeSupreme]

gotta ride it out and move out when you can. ik it feels like it feels never ending and it sucks really badly rn but life gets better one day

im 21 now and life is A LOT better not living with my parents. ik other people too who are the same too

[Cutegirl06]

I'm sorry you're having to go through all this 😔 When you turn 18 in a year you'll be considered an adult and you can do what you want.