Mother in law from hell?

[Anonymous]

I made the mistake of marrying a man who turned out to be emotionally abusive and controlling. His mother wasn’t much better, before we were married randomly after the 2nd meeting, she physically attacked me, destroyed my things, invited his exes into our apartment (I didn’t know she had a key) etc.
Looking back, I 100% should’ve seen the signs.
Later into marriage still before the obvious abuse started, she came around acting nice, but always trying to move in with her older son. She faked injuries for disability and didn’t work.
Suddenly when they started “needing” help, my money started disappearing from my account with excuses like groceries, gas etc. I never even saw my tax returns and blindly (and stupidly) believed they had been put into savings.

Fast forward to our divorce, I initiated due to his infidelity, abuse and control issues. His mother is making decisions regarding our divorce and is attempting to prevent me from making payments on the vehicle because “she should’ve gotten the new car when her son went into the military” (he left it for me to drive aslong as I kept insurance and payments until he’s out)

Obviously I need a lawyer but, what should I do here other than that?

Updates

1 mo

Confronting her is not an option as she is unpredictable and very quick to violence. And anytime I have said anything to my soon to be ex he just acts oblivious.

No need to tell me I shouldn’t have married him after all of that, he was my only serious relationship and at 19 when I got married I thought it was the right thing, on top of that, the abuse from him never happened until after a couple year of marriage.
As an adult now, and looking back, I should’ve noticed the red flags

[OfDeath]

Jesus…

Yeah that is a difficult situation. Firstly, you should never let someone else control your finances but you’ve learnt that lesson now.

Get all your money and open a bank account that your mother in law cannot access. Get a job if you don’t have one already. Move in with a friend or relative (not from your husband’s side of the family) or even into emergency accommodation until you can find a place of your own.

And yes, if you can afford it absolutely go to a lawyer and if you can’t, find a support or charity organisation which specialises in helping domestic abuse victims. Search for them online.

Good luck. Hopefully a hand maiden or a foot soldier can get on to this for you.

[Asker]

I have been living on my own since my separation 8 months ago

[OfDeath]

Ok at least that part is taken care of. Hopefully the rest of the dominoes will fall into place too.

[Zoeysiren]

Oh honey, if you gotta ask, you might have one! Does she criticize everything you do? Try to take over plans? Live to stir the pot? Yeah, that sounds like a mother-in-law from hell. Here's the thing: you can't change her, but you can focus on building a relationship with your partner on how to deal with her together.

[Asker]

I’m not with her son I left due to his abuse. She is involving herself in our divorce

[Fukaroo]

God what a bitch and one hell of a read.