Are you okay with not being liked?

Question

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

You can't please everyone, I know this to be true, but it does bother me when dealing with people I have been nothing but nice to. For example, I used to have this staff member who was a Debbie Downer. Company wanted to fire her because of her negative attitude, but I made it a point to save her job because I know she really needed it. When no one wanted to have a birthday party for her, behind the scenes, I literally told my staff to just consider it a party for themselves which she was attending because she was the only staff member in the entire history of the place, that no one signed up to bring anything for, for her birthday which I thought would have been awful for her. There are so many times where I was the only one who treated her with any kind of kindness despite her overwhelming attitude.

When I left the job, she told someone there, that she was glad I was finally gone. She said she didn't like me and that I was a b*tch. Me? I was beyond incensed, but as everyone pointed out to me, her attitude was her whole personality and kindness cannot always help the hurt people, who seek to hurt people and that I shouldn't let her negativity kill the joy I bring to others. So whether you want to or not, you do have to learn to be okay with not being liked because other than if you are the problem with how you actually treat others, there isn't anything you can do to change how other people see you.

Genie23 · Accepted Answer

Completely fine by me unless it's someone I really care about.

ArrowheadSW · Accepted Answer

That reminds me of a "Seinfeld" episode where a lady who Jerry was dating could not stand George. It drove George crazy and he went to great lengths to get the lady to like him.

Anyway, yes it does bother me if it is someone who I thought I was friendly with, comes across as not liking me or having "issues" with me. If it is someone who I thought I was friends with, I will try to be friendly to them. I'll try it once or twice and then if they still are like that, it is on them. You just can't please everyone.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

I don't mind people not liking me as long as the reason isn't a lie or get the wrong idea about me.

If they don't like me because of my weight then it's fine.

If they don't like me because of what music or stuff I'm into that's fine also.

But if you don't like me because you think I've done or said something out of context where I've meant it one way but you thought another then talk to me straighten it out and if after that you still don't want to me my friend then fine

MrOracle · Answer

I used to REALLY care about that when I was a kid, and, unsurprisingly, I wasn't liked by most people. I was teased and sometimes bullied.

I got pushed far enough in a couple of incidents in Junior High that I snapped and fought my bullies, and I decided then and there that I was completely finished with caring if anyone liked me.

The result? I never had more friends, got invited to more events, and was never treated better than I was once I stopped caring what people thought about me. As soon as I didn't give a fuck, people seemed to think I was cool (or, at least, a whole lot cooler than they thought I was before), and our interactions were completely different.

That was 40 years ago or a little more, and I haven't cared since then. And while I curate my circles of friends pretty carefully, I still have friends and most people seem to like me just fine. And if they don't, who gives a shit? Certainly not me! I've got stuff to do!

D_Bone_Steak · Answer

I've grown to like it. Less bullshit I have to deal with because people = shit 9 times out of 10. If you can protect your safety, not being liked is a very comfortable place to be. I've seen it fuck with people that don't know how to entertain themselves though... so I'm highly aware that I'm not speaking for everyone. Some people are drawn to being included in social things and they're a mess when they don't have that.

But if you're like me, you're elated by the fact nobody wants to bug you with their bullshit.

Rosexøxø · Answer

Certainly.

I couldn’t be any more certain. I’m certain. BUT sometimes as to why some people behave the way they do towards me, due to disliking, is confusing. As I don’t go out of my way to be rude to people just cause of disliking them. But the disliking me is totally fine.

DishLady · Answer

Yes. Absolutely. Haters will hate. It's why they're there. Some folks are not capable of being positive or supportive at all... they can't have real friends bc they're always jealous and comparing themselves then upset to fall short, overcompensating for it, etc. etc. etc. I'm fine with all those people staying the hell away from me.

ohsheeT · Answer

Throughout life people come and go. most good friends make it a point to joke and laugh... but it doesn't bother me if I'm not liked it.

OneViewpoint · Answer

Yeah, completely OK. I actually love it if it keeps most people away from me. There are however some people I want around me. They get to see a different me.

tfan1 · Answer

No not really but I accept that I’m a loser and nothing I do or can do will change that. So be it 😞

On_cloud_wine · Answer

I really could care less if someone likes me or not. As long as you’re polite and civilized around me

Nikolakoala5 · Answer

I guess each to their own, some people just can't stand the idea of not being liked. Bit in my experience id rather be alone and happy than be around lot of people and be miserable

Flowersareawsome22 · Answer

Asian adult I'm at a point where I am not trying to impress people. I don't care at all. Haters gonna hate anyway.

AndrésC64 · Answer

It depends on the situation. IRL, no for some reason I have a hard time with that. I've even asked a friend to apologize to her friend for anything that I may have done in the past. But online, IDGAF

Agape93 · Answer

Yeap, I sincerely don't care. Those that like me, are already my friends or will be. Other people, I don't care about.

Briennette · Answer

For the most part, yes. I would say it is something I try to cultivate more. Not blindly but the main goal for me, is to combat groupthink. It's freaks me out.

queenofcardio · Answer

Sometimes it hurts if it's someone I care about

Anonymous · Answer

It's only an issue of a woman in a boss position, they just have to learn to live with it or make something up to get rid of me. Happened before.

Nikki1989 · Answer

I was past caring about that 20-plus years ago.

Maybe_Maybe_not · Answer

In general? I'm not really facing that situation, I speak politely.

EmmaMary · Answer

It certainly doesn't bother me in the slightest.

Emmytexrex · Answer

Yh ofc not everyone will like you in this world that's how the world operates  There must be people who won't like you at and there will also be people who like you for you

leahzrc · Answer

Yes everyone hates me I think but I am still nice to people

jazzy34 · Answer

Yup. I don't live and breathe to fit into someone's mold. I'm me. :)

SotiCoto · Answer

I practically rely on it. People are shit. I hate them. I don't want to be liked by those I hate. Gross.

Ms_Facesitter · Answer

I am. It's the best way to surround myself with the people I want.

Jmmmfi4 · Answer

Very very used to it... I can be a real dickhead sometimes

WonderingManII · Answer

I know I'm not liked. It is my fate to live this way.

Quetaismymiddlename · Answer

Why would I need other people’s validation? I don’t have control over what others think of me.

Gaylordslav · Answer

Yes I've been hated since I can remember, but I also prefer to be alone so I find comfort in the isolation

beefcakebradybatson · Answer

Especially by fugly, dumb bigots or basic N*******. H**l, I WELCOME their disdain !!!

Arcadian222 · Answer

Yeah ofc. Few people matter only, not everyone

Jeff51 · Answer

Fine with me. I don't care. As you get older it seems somethings you dont care as much.

Anonymous · Answer

I'm liked by the important people. Thats all that matters.

exitseven · Answer

yeah, pretty much. Its been a life long thing.

ChicoFromThe305 · Answer

Yea happens to everyone

Bunnybuny · Answer

Yeah can't please everyone

fonduegirl · Answer

No. But I also don't wish to work on it

abc3643 · Answer

Yes, of course!

Anonymous · Answer

No but it rarely happens

TadBehaya · Answer

Yeah

Darkest-Knight · Answer

I've gotten use to it.

Charliefretz329 · Answer

Yep, and well used to it lol

Bloodparadise · Answer

No.. i want to be liked

blackeagle007 · Answer

Can’t please em all

Anonymous · Answer

Nope.

jahaims · Answer

Yeah

Anonymous · Answer

The less people to please , the better

Pterodon · Answer

Totally

qwerty2469 · Answer

I covet it.

Anonymous · Answer

So-so

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