Family & Friends
15 h

How can I gently distance myself from an overdependent friend before my baby arrives?

Im currently 40 weeks pregnant and one way or another im gonna be a mother in a matter of days.

I've always been a very maternal person and taken in "strays" is probably the best way to describe it. Im always finding myself taking in the mongrel no one else wants and try to fix them only to find out they don't actually want to change they just want to be dependant on me.

I try to see the good people who otherwise are rejected most due to being poor, unhygienic, odd in behaviour etc. I'll take them in as a friend like its an animal rescue or something and ill try to clean them up. This is my problem i think I see potential in a person and try to fix them to what I see fit. That's on me..

I have this friend who I've been friends with for 5 years. he's got ADHD and struggles really badly most people don't like him because he lies, tries to hard to be funny, thinks highly of himself, says inappropriate things, is very over sensitive and doesn't handle his emotions well. I get a lot of secondhand embarrassment from him and I've been told im the only one who can get through to him when hr stops taking care of himself because im always honest with him.

We become really close friends when we were both going through a hard time and didn't have anyone else to support either of us so I've always appreciated him for that. He can be funny and kind and extremely snart when he wants to be but most the time i feel like i have to be his mother.

We have a very sibling like relationship and i feel like i have to act as his carer at times. he's 23 and im 28. there's been times I've had to defend him to other friends.

Its becoming exhausting when in reality he s grown man and ADHD is manageable but he just chooses not to do anything about it or get help because i think he genuinely enjoys the attention he gets from acting out.

I've been on matt leave for a while now and he's complaining he's lonely at work and needs me back after i have my baby
Updates
15 h
he's said he doesn't want me working part time either or works morning shifts or he'll barely see me. I don't think he understands my child comes first. He is not my child and needs to make new friends instead of being a weirdo and scaring people off.
Updates
15 h
Sounds like im being really harsh but he's said things before such as "id love to have a woman's vagina fluid all up in my beard" at work... i had to tell him that was disgusting and inappropriate especially in front of women in the workplace and then he wonders why he can't keep a girlfriend and is still a virgin
How can I gently distance myself from an overdependent friend before my baby arrives?
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