E. g. someone said this to you: "you're average looking"
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Would you be offended if someone calls you "average" in terms of looks?
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Anonymous
(30-35)
+1 y
I’m gonna play devil’s advocate here a bit cause I saw a majority of people said “No.”
Surely one could make the argument that most people ARE average looking, hence the term “average.”
However, for a person to say you are “average looking” that means they don’t find anything about you to be that attractive. Most people would say they have at least one attractive physical characteristic— eyes, hair, butt, chest, etc.
It also means they took the time to assess your physical characteristics and thought “they’re not unattractive, BUT they aren’t attractive either.” So while they didn’t SAY it, they made the assessment that you aren’t attractive. And that is mildly offensive.
As I’m sure others have pointed out, who says it may be more of a determining factor on how offensive it is. A Coworker or boss may say it because saying you are attractive could be unprofessional. However, I think anyone would be hurt if their partner said that, because while it shouldn’t be the pillar of your relationship, I think we all assume our partner finds us physically attractive.
I wouldn’t be too phased by it if it was anyone besides my girlfriend. Attractiveness is subjective, different people have different preferences. But it is an odd comment to make.
Since the vast majority of people are average (which is the very definition of the word), the chances of me being average-looking is exceedingly high compared to being ugly or good-looking.
There's absolutely nothing wrong in being average-looking.
mmm i don't think so. I would say I'm average myself, heck most men and women in every day life are average looking people. Most people walking around are not drop dead gorgeous models. They're just normal. The problem today is that being called normal or average has considered the new below when it's not. Average is not below or high it's just in the middle, and that's fine cause there's nothing wrong with average. It just means common.
Just a little bit, but people barely compliment me in terms of my looks these days. I would be far worse offended if a guy said "Make sure you're prettier then". Because I'd feel like he was Indirectly trying to tell me that I'm ugly right now, and that I should be prettier. Being called "Average" wouldn't get to me as much because I feel like I'm below average. But it really depends on which person it is. To one person I would be classed as 'ugly', to another person I would be stated "The prettiest girl ever". So I can't really tell which one I am, because we all have what another would like or dislike. One thing pretty to one person may seem ugly to another...
Depends on who he is. Family and friends no problem. Partner is a big NO.
Average means in a room of 100 people at least 50 are like me. Feeling like it could have been anyone in my place is a shitty place to be. No thank you I'll find someone who thinks I'm attractive enough to be considered special.
I think it is kind of unnecessary since I know I'm average. I don't think people need that information.
Now if someone is really attractive by societal norms but they think they are not attractive then it is kind to tell them they look pretty or something.
Contrary to popular opinion, "average" is not and cannot be offensive. It's like saying "your jokes are okay". They aren't particularly good or particularly bad, they're decent, maybe bland and uninspired, but they get the job done.
People get angry at the concept of being average, not because average is in and of itself bad, but because it implies they aren't "enough". If you're average, then there are people worse-off than yourself, but there are also people better than you and THAT is the point where people feel dejected. If you are the average of the three most attractive people in a room, that still means you're attractive, but it also means there is someone more attractive, i. e. more desirable than you, and they are now "better" than you by virtue of their "superior" appearance, or at least, that's how most people will interpret that statement.
Here's an often cited fact that gets a lot of men irate: the average penis size in America is between 5.1 and 5.2", as of ~2017. Men with this penis size don't like being told they're average, because online blogs and videos from social media have continually reinforced the notion that a penis size less than 6" is A) inferior (which is true, only insofar as "average" is less than "above average") and B) ONLY sizes above average are desirable. This is categorically false, but since we are constantly sold this narrative of "6" or more please", sort of like "6' feet or taller men only, please", we have come to associate "average" with not only unexceptional, but inherently inferior. We therefore, erroneously, assume that because a 6'+ penis is what women want, "average" is "less than" or, in some cases, "worthless".
I think I'd be like "Thank you." Only semi-sarcastically. I think being seen as "average looking" would be seen as a big step up, if women actually thought I was average looking.
Now, if it was a wife or girlfriend, I think I'd have slightly more of an issue with it. I would want my girlfriend or wife to think I was handsome or good looking. I KNOW I'm no Brad Pitt, or even Don Knotts, but I'd like to be considered a bit sexy. I'd like a LITTLE delusion or confidence builder by them, even if they didn't think it was true, I'd like them to keep up the act.
I am somewhat ok with being average (but I wish I was a "good looking" version of average).
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Anonymous
(30-35)
+1 y
If it was someone I was interested in or my girlfriend/wife then I probably would be offended. If a group of women were rating me and they were all like, yeah, he's average I'd be okay with it. I've had some women say that they don't find me attractive at all. Not that I'm ugly or average but that they just aren't attracted to me at all. I've had a customer give a compliment about my work to my female boss' face and my boss turned around and said, "Who, cutieface over here." I've only been called handsome once, been called cute a shit ton of times and as far as I'm concerned cute is like the upper average. Not above average, but the upper tier of average looking. So, I think I'd be okay with it in general.
While it's often true, it doesn't mean we're not hoping for something better. Although looking normal and average isn't wrong itself, many of us including me wish to look good because of looks matter. It matter both in our society and evolutionary wise. Good looking people gets more positive attention and a bigger dating pool.
No, because I know I'm ugly as shit. There is no need for me to be offended if a person calls me average. I always get complimented on my smile. They'll say, "You have a very beautiful smile" and I just feel like gagging right in front of their faces. I always cringe at that so many times. I hate judging others, but I'll judge myself.
Whether or not I get offended, it wouldn't be unexpected let's get that clear first, I'm quite average looking in real life anyway. But part of me would be like "aww man" I'd be a little upset but not necessarily angry or mad.
But the way they say it might feel offensive. If they imply that it's something to feel bad about.
I don't think so - I've been called average looking a few times before and at least it probably means I'm not ugly. The definition of average looking also varies between people. Sometimes I've heard it mean that I'm neither ugly nor pretty and I've also heard it mean that I'm pretty but I look basic and conventional. I think I'd really only be offended if someone was actively insulting me.
I had a fling with a dude who was obsessed with what I thought of his penis. I wouldn't answer for the longest time, just laugh, but one day it got so annoying, I told him it was average. Hence why it was probably just a fling.
No, unless someone is co-dependent on others for happiness, and their goal is to try to please others to achieve said happiness, what others perceive is irrelevant, unless the goal is to win approval by conformity to society's standards, rather than focus on self-acceptance.
That depends on the person saying that: If said by strangers, okay no problem. By a family member, probably the truth (my family thinks I'm handsome though). However, if an SO were to say that, I would be quite offended.
No I wouldn't expect to look pretty in everyone's eyes. I been called above average most the time. No one is right or wrong. It's just opinion. However No one should say that I'm average to my face it's rude & a true sign of jealousy hense I'll not feel offended itts quite the opposite.
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Anonymous
(25-29)
+1 y
Honestly, If they were commenting on my looks for no reason, I would tell exactly what I thought of them too. That's pretty rude to say to someone unless you are talking to a family member or close friend and you say "how do I look, and be honest." Otherwise it is definitely an insult. If my girlfriend said that to me I would be pretty pissed. The person you are dating is supposed to find you attractive.
I am far from that easily offended. I don't seek validation from others regarding my looks or appearance. Even if I was interested in their opinion I know it's a unique one, which represents their own preference, which doesn't validate anything in that sense. Also, preferences change like how the wind blows. Why value such opinions so highly? So highly it affects people's self-worth.
I don’t really care about what others think of my appearance. As long as I think I look good, I’m happy. I don’t need to please others with how I look like unless it’s someone I really care about (ex. partner). But other than that, I don’t find “average” as an insult.
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Anonymous
(25-29)
+1 y
Only if my partner said it, but I would over react, I’d just wonder why he’s with me. I just feel like since looks are subjective anyway you’re supposed to find a partner who sees you as good looking, not average.
No, because statistically I am average looking. Not everyone can be physically beautiful, there are a handful of knockouts, a handful of unfortunates and the rest of us are average and there is nothing wrong with that
Nahh. I've been called stuff worse than that and I used to get offended but nowadays, I hardly get offended by anything. There was stuff that made me so uncomfortable in the past. I embraced all of that and now I'm very hard to offend.
Not really, because I'm average just like most people, though the tone of voice could offend me, because some people use average as a synonym of ugly and when they say "you are average" they sound like they are saying "eeww".
Voted no but I'd be hurt a little bit. I get it all the time. Colleagues don't just call me average looking, they straight up call me horrible looking. Yeah it hurts but who cares🤷
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Anonymous(30-35)
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