Is it a turn on?
Turn off?
Desperate?
One thirsty female?
Can't get a man?
Too aggressive?
No matter what the answer to that, I don't really care. If I have my eye on a man and I feel some mutual vibes coming from him but he is too shy to say hi, I'd definitely approach him. I'd flash him a smile, wave, or nod and if the reply is positive, it's time to get to work, girls.
If he's too busy to know I am alive, I can always remind him that I am here.
Thanks for the time reading.
Xo Pinay_ako
It's not desperate, for me that's progress. Girls being able to ask guys out takes a lot of pressure from us, because girls that like you can make the first move instead of waiting for guys to make it.
Opinion
53Opinion
I generally view it as positive when a woman makes the first move. You can usually tell when it is out of desperation by the way she approaches you and talks to you, similarly, this also indicates when she is doing it because she is confident and reasonably certain of success.
I think more women should make the first move. They'll then get the guy they want, not just the one who happens to approach them.
I make a move if I’m interested but I’m always shy about it. I don’t do it bc I’m super confident or trying to prove how amazing I am. It’s practical position. I want to shut it down if it’s a no go. I don’t like wasting time getting into someone who’s not interested. This weird line where a woman should wait bc if they guy is interested he will let you know and if he’s not interested move on... and at what point one becomes the other - who knows. I’m meant to wait. He’s not waiting. I’m not a puppy I’m a human being. Wwhy should I waste my life “waiting” -whether a day a week whatever. Whoever is initiating knows their intention. if you are waiting you are in the dark. There is an immediate imbalancr of power. Making things worse trying to find out any info now looks “desperate”. People who “wait” end up neurotic bc there’s no information for the mind to process so they fill in the blanks endlessly. You see all these questions does he like me does xyz mean he’s interested why did he say this etc. these questions are filling in the blanks and the time between meeting the guy and the guy making a move. If she did something herself she’d know what was going on and wouldn’t be guessing and picking at straws. Some women find it beneath them to ask a guy out. I find it degrading to waste time asking silly questions when I can just solve the issue once and for all. It seems odd that with life being finite a normal past time would be waiting for someone else to do something you could do yourself just bc of your genitalia. Ifk maybe woman feel they can afford to waste time bc they live longer than men 🤨
Anyhow Nice take 😊
I was not willing to risk the possibility of the guy I like never initiating a conversation with me because he was just a guy in one of my classes of over 200 people. The likeliness of that happening was slim to none, so I decided to take matters into my own hands and start conversations multiple times and see how it went. Now we have each others contact information and a study date set up so I'm very glad I didn't just wait around in hopes something would happen, cause odds are he still wouldn't have a clue who I am.
The guys who approach me are not usually my type so it doesn't make any sense to me to have my options of dates be limited to those who specifically choose me... I want to choose.
Men and women both hate rejection. It is unfair to always expect the guy to take all the risk. This is especially true since so many women think they are supposed to play some form of the outdated manipulative game of "hard to get." It makes things so convoluted and complicated for guys so women shouldn't be surprised when guys rarely make a move anymore. Most guys appreciate when women are direct and show obvious interest. That gives him the confidence to take it from there. Heck, I had a woman tell me that she thought I was handsome and liked me. It sure didn't scare me off. Guys appreciate directness.
I agree with your take and I think women should approach first more often in general. A guy who judges a girl and thinks she easy for approaching would probably think that about her no matter who approached who.
Women approaching also gets rid of the excuse that the only reason they end up with assholes and players is because those are the ones who approach. If you're not getting approached by the quality of guys you want approach guys that interest you. Why wait around for someone who may not approach for a lot of reasons. Some guys may be waiting for the perfect time to approach, or aren't approaching because you seem busy (or have headphone is, are absorbed with a book or your phone).
I also wanted to say that I even though I have been approached in the past and didn't take the offer (mainly because I was dating, other times because I wasn't looking for a relationship or interested), I'v ealways had a lot of respect for those who approached.
I like your Take it is really positive, but I just have to say that women should not have to make the first move in life for a man. We carry and give birth to their and our children, we cook and clean, some of us work a job, some of us are single parents, we have cramps we go through so much, I just feel like men should be the ones to AT LEAST, at the very least compared to what we women go through, they should at least ask us out and be the one to propose. Rejection does hurt, but I feel like men can handle that pain as we women handle the physical pain we go through on a monthly basis. Some women might be called to ask the guy out, but they are not the norm, I respect them but I just feel like the guy should be the one to ask her out, make her feel special, like he is saying I chose you out of all these beautiful women in this world.
I always say that a guy needs to learn to make the first move if he's to exceed in modern dating culture, but it's definitely refreshing if a woman makes the first move.
It's definitely not a turn-off, though if a woman is going against the social norm, I do tend to assume she has lower standards. If you don't have low standards and just want to talk to guys you like, then hats off to you. You're awesome.
By the way, reading your full question, it sounds like you're dealing with a shy guy. Smiling and poking won't be enough. Sit right next to him, talk to him, say something mildly amusing. If it seems like he'll never make the first move, then he probably never will. Give him a good reason to flirt.
I think gender roles like this are stupid, and it's really impressive to me when people do their own thing and disobey arbitrary rules (for example, rules like "women can't make the first move"). I don't see any reason why women shouldn't make the first move.
That said, I don't blame the women (or men, being as I'm one of them) who don't approach. No matter who you are or what you believe, rejection DOES effect your self-image, and constant rejection can seriously harm someone's self-esteem. It's better to stop being rejected than to start hating yourself.
In Western countries , men are labelled as wannabe rapists for even showing a hint of interest , and many fear a sex crime accusation , men are bashed just for existing , add to that that most approaches will = rejection ( a lot of women can be very nasty too !! ) , this is why less men will approach now.
At least a woman has far less chance of a rejection , esp a mean , nasty one that a lot of men experience , also there is no such thing as a woman that cannot get a man... unless she prices herself out of the market. Another good take !!
It was nice to read but I don't agree. I would be more around that guy so that he knows I exist but I would never make the first move and a woman cannot force her ideas on me. It is more respectable in my culture for a guy to approach a girl first or for guy's parents to bring the marriage proposal. Not every norm has to changed just because it is 21st century. Even with Adam and Eve, when Adam called Eve, god commanded him to get up and walk to Eve. This shows that males have to come as suitors.
It depends on the culture and religion. In Hinduism, a girl's parents have to bring the marriage proposal but in Islam, a man's parents have to bring the marriage proposal. In Islam, a groom's family have to give wedding gifts like gold jewellery but in Hinduism, a groom's parents demand dowry and sometimes they demand more than a girl's parents can afford like they may demand a car, or money for flight tickets or visa. Once one man demand money for visa but didn't take his wife with him.
Simply going up to a guy and asking him out is not desperate. Far from it. Why would it b any different when its a man doing it? Most guys get flattered if women approach them and ask them out. But that doesn't guarantee a date of course, it just depends if they like you or not. Be prepared to face rejection though.
What makes someone look desperate is how they do it/carry themselves
I really liked the take. I myself do feel confident when it comes to making the first move. When, I met up with a guy that I met on a dating site called, Plenty of Fish (POF), I gave him a hug first to break the ice some. I think it's important that men and women both show initiative when it comes to dating. I'm not afraid to give you hug, or a smile, or even flirt a little.
HELL YEAH! Now THAT is a real WOMAN, who gets what she is after 👩
cf.girlsaskguys.com/.../...0-a6ec-7981eaab9c88.jpg
That is really admirable!
Confident women are as sexy as confident men for women!
Enjoy your relationship :)
I wish more women would be just like you. It would make the initiating stage less stressful for guys and as a guy, it's nice to know when women are interested in me.
This idea of men having to make the first move all the time is outdated. Both genders should be able to make the first move.
depends on what you consider as "making the move" and if you're within the guy's "type" range
its the same for girls too
if a guy that's not the girl's type hits on them, they don't like it/see it as creepy/thirsty/feel uncomfortable/etc. Sometimes though, girls (or humans in general) find a guy thats not even near her type attractive based on a lot of different things (one of them can be how he approaches her)
Plus, if the guy doesn't read her signs/body language/eye contact/etc while making moves on her, that can make the situation even worse and he ends up on the other side of where he wants to be
TURN ON.
Even if I'm not attracted to that girl I have so much more respect for her in some ways, I will never fault a woman for not bullshitting and beating around the bush like most "fragile" chicks do.
i COULD NEVER DO ALL THAT. I AM SORRY.
AND TRUTH BE TOLD THED MAJORITY IS OK WITH ME ON THE SIDELINES.
I THINK IT ALSO HAS TO DO WITH SELF ESTEEM AND WHAT YOU THINK YOU ARE WORTH, BECAUSE THERE ARE A LOT OF DAYS THAT I DO NOT THINK I AM GOOD ENOUGH FOR ANYONE OR ANYTHING DESPITE WHAT PEOPLE SAY.
It would be nice if more women would initiate but in this country it's rare if non-existant. European women, Austrailian, Japanese and Korean women all have a parity with their male counterparts. They also tend to have happier relationships. American women? Forget about it! And of course they'll spend the rest of their lives complaining about the asshole bad boy that they fell for.
I personally enjoy women having the courage to be able to make approaches, and being true to their intentions if you like someone make a move, nobody is a mind reader. that goes for both sexes
When a woman or man makes the first move , all that means is that you have a burning desire to approach and admit your infatuation towards that particular individual. Nothing more or less.
You can also add your opinion below!
Most Helpful Opinions