Flirting for shy people


The only thing that you need for flirting is very simple, it's just a matter of tactics. You place yourself physically nearby and start commenting about whatever random thing is happening on the place, call it weather call it furniture.

You simply keep talking talking talking, if you don't know what to talk about ask questions.

If the person is attracted to you you will know, they will smile in a very characteristic way. Only if that happens invite them to do something with you. Something simple that doesn't clearly show it is like a date, rather an opportunity for keeping up the interaction. For example going to the café and having something.

If they are truly interested on you she will gave you all kind of opportunities to keep the interaction going, and escalate it sexually. For example by getting very physically close to you.

If that happens don't be ashamed whatsoever to show your interest back. At that point they cannot be scared of whatever you do about it, they want it. Touch them on simple parts of their body, like the forearm or the belly, or give them some small kiss on the lips, the same way you would do with a beloved one.

Your goal isn't to convince anybody, but to assest if they are interested back. Either they are already or they aren't, that simple.

The thing is most people won't show interest not because they aren't, but because they are also too shy. What they liked to have is the opportunity to get flirtatious without having the feeling they could be rejected anytime.

Flirting for shy people
Add Opinion
5Girl Opinion
13Guy Opinion

Most Helpful Girls

  • just_chubby_
    yeah but sometimes girls do not like guys who are too direct and wants to get too close
    I think time is the main factor which determines who stays or leaves
    Like 1 Person
    Is this still revelant?
    • Hahaha! 🤣

      Yellow is my favourite color.

      For example.

    • yeah that's what I was talking about 😂

    • I don't expect all girls to like me.

      Just 95% of them.

    • Show All
  • nancy1991
    Real talk dude
    Like 2 People
    Is this still revelant?
    • Hahaha 🤣

    • Yeah, they are so focused on convincing that they miss out the obvious: that the other person is a human and just wants a normal human interaction.

Most Helpful Guys

  • philipfz1994
    Oh... why not for people that have problem with getting contact to people at all...
    Is this still revelant?
  • poneglyphs
    Nice dude, but yeah it's hard to flirt when you're shy
    Like 1 Person
    Is this still revelant?
    • Do you think you are shier than a girl?

    • jkm1864

      I was pretty shy but I had no problems with talking to women I just assumed they didn't want anything to do with Me so I missed all the social cues that they were interested. Actually thinking back it was quite hilarious really because most of them were confused all to hell.

Scroll Down to Read Other Opinions

What Girls & Guys Said

  • SomeGuyCalledTom
    I think everyone should develop their own "signature style" of flirting.

    It depends partly on your natural sense of humour (eg: you might be more associative and using your imagination to find the absurdity in everyday situations; or you might be more of a piss-taker who likes to ruffle people's feathers, etc).

    It also depends on how comfortable you are being sexual-- it's perfectly fine to be a bit more reserved and coy in the beginning, with little hints of sexuality sprinkled in here and there as you get more comfortable. Or you might be more over and escalate things in a more direct way, talking explicitly about sexual interests, etc.

    And then there's that intangible factor of overall confidence. Not everyone has the "golden mouthpiece", some are introverted and prefer to interact one on one; others are extroverts who "work the room" and try to win over a group of friends of the person they're interested in. You gotta know where you're at in terms of the social situations that bring out the best in you. I find it hard to make conversation inside nightclubs, but once I get into the smoking area or a nearby park, then I can be quite flirtatious and witty and poised.
    Like 1 Person
  • cohenrique
    Honestly, are you "shy"? Were you ever "shy"? Something about this feels like an extroverts guide to an introverts problems.

    Albeit, I appreciate the effort to not force the usual "get over it", "go out there, get rejected."

    If it's effective and truly helpful, you will hear a lot of introverts commending it.
    Like 1 Person
    • I was shy, I'm no longer shy.

    • Good stuff, I respect that.

      And overall I think you have good advice. Ultimately any shy person will benefit from learning to interact better.

      That being said, some shy people are way insecure, and I think most of them might have a hard time even doing what you describe.

      I don't think there isn't hope for them though. It's just probably a less direct and efficient approach that might work for those types.

      Thanks for your offered wisdom, because that's what it is since you speak from experience.

    • You are welcome.

      My question is: what are they insecure about?

      What makes them feel inadequate? What does a person need to be attractive to other people?

      Would they still feel inadequate if those things were gone?

    • Show All
  • zeitgeist057
    Great take, man. I'm feeling inspired to try to ask this girl from my kickbox class out. I talked to her the first time yesterday and it went well, I liked her tattoo and she started showing me a picture of the full thing on her phone.

    omg she is so beautiful I wanna die...
  • comberchick
    A good way for why people to see if someones interested in them while out at a bar is look at your watch. Or pretend to then look around and see if anyone else is checking the time... it. works , trust me
    • Umm, nice tip! 😉

    • Wait you are saying look at your watch, then look around to see who is mimicking you looking at their watch.. . Like the contagious yawn, then someone else yawns?

  • Lman3000
    Yeah flirting, boy that's something that no matter how hard I attempt or try to be charming or drop hint's it always ends the same. either I have a boyfriend or no one talks to me after I make it clear what I want. if ya got good looks ya got an advantage if not well your words better be on point otherwise you'll crash and burn like I have so many times over that pretty much have the personality of a zombie that I just don't feel anything and just feel dead on the inside.
    • How many times do you think I have failed? 🤣

      If you threw a coin and three times you failed to guess the side, do you think it is as probable as before to fail again?

    • Lman3000

      Weird logic but whatever ya say pal, it won't change my outcomes

    • Don't worry, your urges will override your thinking.

    • Show All
  • serious
    According to me flirting is something that is totally unnecessary. I see flirting as something that is cheap and immoral. I don't care if people glorify flirting but my thinking won't change.

    I never flirt, never. I am always serious, honest and straightforward and so if I talk properly using proper language and in full sentences only. If people find that appealing and like to talk to me then it is fine, but if people want to avoid me then that is also completely fine. I don't care. My thinking won't change as far as certain things are concerned and will be the same till the moment I live.

    Yes, if a woman tries to flirt with me then I will ask her to stop and I will leave that place immediately. There are certain things I won't accept and tolerate also. I am very strict with certain things.

    That's my answer. Simple.
    • serious


      Okay, I don't know who this guy is and what is he trying to say? but then my opinion and my thinking is still the same.

      Whatever I said in my opinion stays the same.

  • LuminousMind
    I liked your MyTake! Do you mind following me so I could send a PM? I’d like your advice.
  • incelposting
    So what you're saying is "exist while being physically attrsctove"
  • Michael82
    The reason I'm shy is I'm afraid if girls see me w a hearing aid they will run
    • And if you didn't wear hearing aids, what would you feel afraid about?

    • Michael82

      I can't hear them without it

    • I mean if you didn't need them?

    • Show All
  • SecretGardenBlood65
    Good take
    Like 1 Person
  • alance99
    Shy people have tuff time in dating world
    Like 1 Person
  • DennisWatkins91
    Just don't need to be shy)
  • Robertcw
    This is pure gold! Thanks man. Very helpful.
  • Barbarian8
    I LL give a try the first step