My boyfriend thinks I'm a kid? or that I dont act like an adult. he's 22 and im 19?

[Anonymous]

our age difference isn't by much, but i guess our lifestyles are. I'm still studying, and he's already done studying and got a really good job and lives on his own. even tho we love each other i think our age difference is causing some arguments. in arguments he's been saying that im still kid and i wouldn't understand his adult stresses or the stuff he has to deal with. I guess also at times, i dont understand how busy he really is also and that makes him mad

Sometimes, even though i know its the last thing he ever intends to do, it makes me feel bad about myself, when he says i'm not an adult or that i dont act like one. I thought i was mature, so im just so confused on what he means, and I also wonder if this relationship will work at this time, if he views me as a kid and not an adult

Also, he calls me a teen a lot jokingly, and in the past he's told me he hate teens and thinks theyre annoying... I don't know what teen traits are, but i also think maybe i annoy him at times.

What does he mean? and what can i do to compromise and make things work

[Phoenix98]

I have to go with Koolz and Amante on this they makes a good point, I'm 21 right now getting ready to turn 22 and I don't really like being dating a girl who still acts like they are still in school or still have that you know attitude, I'm more into dating mature ladies my age. I've never liked immature girls as Amante said maturity is defined by experience not age. And I've been working since I was like eleven or twelve years old my first job was working in a warehouse loading, unloading heavy freezers, dishwashers and repaying , cleaning all kinds of appliances, and at the moment I am simultaneously saving up money to buy a new car because my De ville got trashed and can't be driven anymore and for college as well as money to have for when I get my own home and I'm helping to financially support my entire family because they need the money. So on top of my own job I do odd jobs for family members and around town, and I apprentice under my father a master oil painter in order to further my own painting skills and I write on the side as well as train and learn martial arts. Lot of responsibility and stress, so for me I don't really have time or patience necessary to date that kind of girl if and when I do get the time to date its has to be with someone who is mature and I won't play games they are precise and to the point.

[Koolz123]

How do you act towards him? I'm 22 and I know that we want a more meaningful relationship cause this the time where we get our lives together I like someone that is 20 and in my eyes she hasn't matured yet because she goes out all the time post drunk shit/pics on social media and write things that seems like their still in high school and when I talk to her she kinda has that high school mentality that she's shy when I want to have a great convo and connect with her depends on what you do but I wouldn't sweat it just know that relationships don't last ever at this age the best relationships happen after college

[Elyzian]

Maybe he thinks youa have a younger mind, for example you dont see a lot of older couples having tickle wars or something, and youger ones do... I don't know its a really hard concept to explain, but I know where you are coming from... my bf is 19 and I am nearly 21, the age gap isn't quite as big as yours, but he is still a teen and I am a young adult.. he still has an exceptionally young mind compared to me where my mind was forced to mature at a young age so I don't understand some of the things he does, like fan girling over certain xbox games.

My best tip is to talk to him, explain how things make you feel and encourage him to do the same, ask what things annoy him, and stuff like that.

[MysteriousFlower]

You are legally an adult, maybe he is referring to you emotionally as a kid. All couples have arguments, find a way to resolve things peacefully.

[PiuBelloAmante]

Maybe he wants a more mature relationship, even though 3 years isn't a lot, maturity is defined by experience not age

Step outside yourself and try to view yourself from the eyes of others, if you still think that you aren't immature as he says he is probably a little irrational.

Just be yourself, and if he doesn't like it, he doesn't have to stay with you and you don't have to stay with him

[Cuddles61]

Just be yourself... if he can't deal with that he does not deserve to be your boyfriend. Don't try to be someone or act like someone you are not.