Creepy guy in my college class?

[Anonymous]

Help! So I'm in college and I have a math class. There's this creepy guy in it who I have no interest in. One day he started talking to me when we were walking out. Now everytime I try to take my time but he walks either slow or fast so that he is right by me. Yesterday after class he waited for me and asked me what the assignment was again. Then he made small talk and asked if I partied and then asked if he could get my number so I was like uh sure then you could tell me if you hear of any parties. I gave him my real number and he called me right there to make sure it was the right one!! He hasn't texted me but I'm scared to go to class now. I don't want to talk to him at all or even be friends and I get really bad anxiety. I don't even wanna go to class anymore because I know I'll have to talk to him afterwards when he tries to walk by me. I don't have any other friends in the class so I can't talk to someone else so he leaves me alone. HELP

Updates

+1 y

Okay no need to be jerks. Maybe creepy was the wrong word. I'm just not looking for a relationship and sick of people trying to get with me cause I'm too nice to say no when they ask for my number cause I feel mean and it gets awkward and I hate awkward.

[Anonymous]

He likes you.
Creepy is the wrong word, he's just a guy you don't like.
First of all, you don't owe him anything so don't feel bad for giving him the cold shoulder or simply not liking him or wanting to be around him..
Secondly, why did you give your number to a guy you don't even want to talk to in class? Now you've given him permission to talk to you outside of class as well so you can blame yourself for that one.
All you can do at this point is keep your distance. Don't reply to his texts, If he talks to you give him short responses, if he follows you out of class go in the opposite direction he's going in, if he still follows you go into the ladies restroom if its close by or act like you're making a call on your phone (make it seem like you're talking to a guy). Repeat these things often until he leaves you alone. Its going to be awkward but that's life. DO NOT skip class because of this guy. There was a class I skipped every night in undergrad because I was afraid of classmate who always tried convincing me to get into his car, or come to his dorm, or go somewhere with him alone and I ended up having to repeat the course. Don't let that be you.

[Opinion Owner]

*isn't

[xobrowneyedbeauty]

He's interested in you, there's nothing "creepy" about what he's doing. It seems very normal to me, maybe he's just slightly awkward but it doesn't really sound it. He probably called you right there so that you had his number, not to make sure it was the right one. That probably didn't even cross his mind.

Helpful tip - don't give your number to people if you don't want to talk to them.

[Toad-1]

YES i wanna stress that last tip!

[xobrowneyedbeauty]

Now that you did what you did though, maybe bring headphones? Put them in and like look down at your phone while you're leaving and he probably won't approach you anymore. You do have the option to tell him you aren't interested but I feel like most girls are really bad at that.

[linds34]

It sounds like he's kind of a weird guy but isn't doing anything wrong. You didn't have to give him your number if you didn't want him to contact you. If he keeps talking to you just straight up say he's a nice guy but you're not interested. If you don't want to say that, just say you have a boyfriend whether that's true or not. Don't stop going to class, there's just no reason to do that.

[Anonymous]

Hm, it sounds normal to me since he does seem interested in you. I probably wouldn't give people your number in the future if you aren't interested. That minor awkward situation is way better than the stress and anxiety you have now. Just tell him you aren't looking to date or anything right now if he continues.

[cavmanier]

You don't have to talk to him. It sounds like he thinks you're pretty and wants to get to know you. Giving him your number gave a signal that you probably have some interest in him. Distancing yourself from him would tell him you aren't interested. You're allowed to do that.

[Prof_Don]

Um... what about this is "creepy "? He made small talk with you, he asked u for ur number, YOU GAVE IT TO HIM, and he called it immediately to give u his number.

Sorry you're going through anxiety... but this is a you problem. The guy isn't doing anything wrong.

[alfonsosloan45]

This is EXACTLY WHAT I AM TALKING ABOUT ON THIS WEBSITE.

Women like this shame men for almost EVERYTHING. So what you don't like him. You can't simply make all of the people you don't like disappear. If he was hot this wouldn't be an issue. This is like catcalling. If the guy is hot it is alright. If he is ugly it isn't. This is why men can't take women like you seriously. Nothing about what you fucking said makes him creepy. He is just fucking talking with you. Men hate women like you because you shame men for the bullshit that hasn't even happened.

[Tdawg223]

I used to never be afraid of talking to girls, ever, until now that I am in college, I have to worry about every girl thinking I am a creep just because I talk to her. I have had some bad experiences with this, and it is just so off putting to want to talk to other girls. I realize they aren't all like this, but some of them are, and it makes it hard to trust girls. With all of the sexual harassment crap going on now, us guys now have to worry about this, and it sucks... Now if a guy even shows interest as in talking to a girl, it can be taken so out of context.

[Words_and_Wisdom]

Sounds like he's just shy and awkward. Don't see anything 'life threatening' about him as how you're reacting. Women these days tend to throw the label "creepy" as if it were a witch hunt. If it makes you uncomfortable you should just simply tell him. You have a problem owning up to your feelings and this is the result of it.

As for you anxiety... I wouldn't know what to tell you other than some tips to help you mitigate it at times. Like counting backwards from 30 to 1 or listening to music. But sounds like you need to be more aware of creating irrational scenarios in your head.

[kataloso]

Sounds like you're too nice, which isn't a bad trait but in situations like this you gotta be able to avoid sending mixed signals. When he tries to talk to you just keep your responses very short and let him know you're busy and have to go. Do the fake "oops, I gotta call my friend back" if you have to. You can be nice but still make it clear to him you're interested. Most guys will take the hint and back off.

[RexCatholicissimus]

I don't think a girl who bitches about a guy she willingly mislead and then insulted him afterwards is "too nice", or anywhere near it.

Fuck, man. Some of you guys are so spineless when it comes to telling a girl like it is, you CAN call a bitch a bitch, you know.

[kataloso]

make it clear to him you're *NOT interested, I meant to say.

People are getting worked up about the word "creepy"... whatever label you want to put on it, the guy is being a spaz in how he's trying to approach you, and you need to be more direct in letting him know you're not interested.

[kataloso]

@RexCatholicissimus Relax homie. She was approached by a spaz guy who sounds like one of those annoying sales people at a mall kiosk... obviously she should have just been more direct in shooting him down, to avoid sending mixed signals, but she wasn't comfortable doing that because she's too nice/inexperienced handling this type of situation.

[Octavius]

Just go to class if he makes small talk he makes small talk. If he invites you to crap just respectfully decline. If he asks you out tell him you're not interested. He is being creepy and very aggressive about it. That's just a huge red flag that he checked to make sure it was your number right there in front of you.

[R3d_Anonymous]

How the hell is he bring creepy?

[Octavius]

@R3d_Anonymous We don't know the full details, if the poster says they're creepy then I'll give them the benefit of the doubt because I'm not there in person to observe. Either way they're asking for advice so I gave them some. Just getting pissy at her for who she calls a creep doesn't solve the actual situation at hand.

[Anonymous]

You need to learn how to say no. If a guy doesn't interest you, you shouldn't be giving him your phone number.

media2.giphy.com/media/TNYy8aY7yateU/giphy.gif

[cavmanier]

Seriously

[Anonymous]

Ugh, he isn't being creepy, you're just not attracted to him (but you still gave him your number, which is only going to encourage him to keep talking to you because he thinks he might have a chance with you).

Just grow a spine and tell him you aren't interested. Seriously.

[CheerGirl38139]

Two things.

1. Welcome to college

2. Learn to say NO. (It's OK)

[dudegrt09]

Why don't you brother zone him, works everytime...
but seriously, don't give him any signs that you want to be friends or anything with him, like for example giving him your real number, tell him you have a boyfriend and are getting engaged to him, give him one word replies, and always tell him you're in a hurry when he tries to talk to you, long story short you have to give him all kinds of signs that you want nothing to do with him, he'll get the point, try not being rude though...

[madhatters4]

why is he a creep because he displays interest in you?
if he disgusts you or whateve why'd you give him your number?

why don't you simply say, 'I don't want to waste your time. I'm don't really see you like that' ...

[ThreeMonkeys]

Tell him clearly that you are not interested. Tell him giving him your number was a mistake. If her persists... say I am sorry... please don't contact me again. I am not comfortable and if you do I will have to report you.

[ThreeMonkeys]

him*

If you can't have this conversation in person... text him.

[xobrowneyedbeauty]

Report him for talking to her? Isn't that a little extreme? I wouldn't threaten reporting him she will sound like a psycho

[ThreeMonkeys]

@xobrowneyedbeauty "He hasn't texted me but I'm scared to go to class now. I don't want to talk to him at all or even be friends and I get really bad anxiety. I don't even wanna go to class anymore because I know I'll have to talk to him afterwards when he tries to walk by me."

Sounds like she is scared to go back to class.

NO... not report him for talking to her. I said report him if he persists even after she says she wants to contact with her.

[ThreeMonkeys]

NO... not report him for talking to her. I said report him if he persists even after she says she does not want him to contact her.

[xobrowneyedbeauty]

She's scared to go to class because what he might ask for the homework assignment again? I agree that she needs to be very clear that she isn't interested. How is anyone supposed to expect someone is going to be SCARED of them because they talk to them after class? I get having social anxiety but it's not his fault

[ThreeMonkeys]

@xobrowneyedbeauty

Her life. Her safety. Her comfort level. She is entitled to all of those. I am not tell her to go call cops on this guys ass... I am saying lay it out clearly. If the guy is cool... he would completely understand and back off. Maybe in the future... if he is someone cool... they might meet under favorable circumstances and get it on. IDC.

Point is today...

1) she is scared
2) she is getting anxiety attacks
3) she is not interested and wants no contact

She can lay it out clearly and respectfully for the guy. If the guy genuinely is worth the time... he will understand and not continue. However, if HE PERSISTS and is not listening and ignoring does not work... then the best way to deter him is to let him know his actions are not okay and he will be reported. If he transgresses that... then def. report him. Just so that a cop or someone else can tell him to back off.

She finds him creepy
Yes she could be wrong... but none of us see him to make an assessment.

[ThreeMonkeys]

Even if it sounds ridiculous.

I rather someone be safe then sorry.
www.nytimes.com/.../...al-contact-study-finds.html

1/4 is a ridiculously high number but lets assume the real number is 1/10. Even then that puts many many people at risk.

[ThreeMonkeys]

@xobrowneyedbeauty do you agree with me now or what?

[R3d_Anonymous]

Nothing about this is "creepy". Just because you're not interested in him doesn't make him creepy.

[Anonymous]

He is just trying to make a move, he probably likes you. If that moment ever comes, just tell him the truth that you are not interested in him, no need to panic. This is simply "boy likes girl".

[Bandit74]

Try to make yourself ugly so that he'll think you're creep too and lose interest in talking to you.

[takumii]

You are an inspiration , please teach me the art of over-reacting. I make you my guru.

[sizedoesnotmatter]

seriosuly is this is your definition to creepy? he didn't do any thing wrong u did why did gave him you number in the first place?

[Aeon_Flux_21]

"A low status male has a crush on me... EWWW CREEPY!"

[RexCatholicissimus]

Remember folks, creepy = unattractive.

[Anonymous]

lol hahaaha. thats what you get for looking down on people

[SarahsSummer]

Make other friends fast!!

[Toad-1]

So he's a creep because YOU gave him your number?