What's the difference between liking someone and liking the idea of someone?

[Anonymous]

What's the difference between liking someone and liking the idea of someone?

[Anonymous]

They will tell you that they aren't looking for anything serious. They will be depressed about things they can't talk about with you. They will hesitate to take steps towards 'relationship' territory. They still talk to them, or more importantly they still are very emotionally effected by the end of the relationship. They try to insulate you from other parts of their life, like meeting their friends or family. They don't won't want their ex to find out... or they will rub it in his face to make them jealous.

But the best way to tell is to ask them. PAY CLOSE attention to their body language and how they respond. Because more often not someone that isn't over won't admit it! If they get squeamish trying to answer it or take along time figuring out what to say they are not over it. For example if you ask, would you ever want to get back with them? And they answer with it doesn't matter they wouldn't want me... then they are not over them. You will have to use your instinct to determine their honesty.

Figuring out if they are over it can be easy, the hard part is deciding whether they will get over anytime soon, or will it eventually destroy your relationship. In my experience it destroy's relationships eventually. Because one of two things will happen. (1) they will never get close to you and still be drawn to someone else and maybe try to get back together with them or (2) they will get over them and lose interest in you.

Type of girls that don't get over their ex's are kind of easy to pick out tho:

(1) The girl that is friends with ALL of her ex's. She is clinger, and doesn't let go easily

(2) A girl who always has a boyfriend. These girls can't stay single, next guy that comes along they cling to 'em

(3) Only had one real relationship and it wasn't healthy and it lasted a long time

hope this stuff helps

[pianojess]

Good insight! I think this goes for guys as well, as the 3 characteristics you listed in the end describes my ex EXACTLY. yikes!

[Boneless-skeletal]

I think every person has an ideal fantasy in their head, and without knowing they match every person they meet against that fantasy. To me that is "liking the idea of someone." To like someone means you got to know them and like them for who they really are.

I'm not sure if that was your question. Perhaps you should try to be more specific. :-)

[Asker]

Oh. That makes sense actually, lol. Thank you!

[torken]

They relieve certain things from the relationship. They talk about the past alot, almost dreamily. They attach meaning to odd things. Personally I was pretty heartbroken over a break-up, and I found myself putting a lot of love into a kitten I found in a cardboard box that reminded me of her, even though I'm allergic to cats. Also, they seem to be sorta uneasy about commitment, and sometimes about saying "I love you"

Stuff like that. If he is still heart broken, just give him time, and talk to him about it. If you can help him out of it, he will transfer a lot of the feelings he had for her to you, which can be nice I imagine :)

[carlwizz]

Normally still having pictures or phone numbers or some form of contact and showing hardly any interest in new partner or even comparing the two..

[jennjenn]

i think we may be in the same boat here I just asked a similar question I hope you find out.

[Anonymous]

Sounds like one is liking someone, and the other is an excuse to not like someone when you do ?

[Gregs]

your question doesn't make and f***ing sense

[IdioticMe]

He/she keeps talking about his/her exes