Why does my neighbor always hit me in the nuts?

[Anonymous]

My neighbor and I are the same age, we both just started high school. I think she's really cool and we've both been friends for a long time. Lately she's hit me in the balls all the time and just laughs at me. We have always like pretend fought and stuff just like any other friends do I guess but now she hits me there and I'm not a fan of that. The other day I told I wouldn't have kids If she kept doing that and she was like or maybe I'm just making them stronger. We pull pranks on eachother all the time and stuff but this isn't really a prank (although sometimes she does it by surprise). I have always had a little crush on her but I don't think it's obvious. Do you think she's doing this to drive me away because she knows I have a crush? Why is she doing this? Do many girls do this to their friends? Did I do something to her I didn't know about or does she just do it for fun? I don't know I just don't want her to do it but I'm a little scared if I tell her not to that it will be a big dramatic thing

[WalterBlack]

She's either asserting dominance or she wants to provoke you to be physical with her (wrestling, play fighting). If you have other reasons to think she likes you, a sexy move would be to pin her down and kiss her after you've been play fighting for a few min. If she doesn't reciprocate, you can always make a joke about it, saying "I though you liked me that way because you are obsessed with my balls". Hopefully that will get her to either admit she likes you or stop hitting you in the balls.

[Asker]

I don't know about straight up kissing her. Seems like a risk but maybe, good idea!

[WalterBlack]

It is a judgement call. If the moment feels right and there is at least a 50/50 chance that she will be happy about it, then go for it!!! She has no reluctance to make contact with your groin area, so she shouldn't be too upset about you trying to kiss her. Prudish girls don't usually go around hitting guys in the balls just for fun.

[WalterBlack]

It can be really awkward to have the "I like you, do you like me?" conversation. Sometimes a well-timed kiss is way less awkward than having that conversation.

[Asker]

Yeah that's a good point about prudish girls. Because she used to be like that but this past year she's changed a lot. One time she literally slapped me in the nuts. So like her hand touched them and even though it hurt I was like wow what just happened. So maybe she is into me.

[Crapulux]

Short answer: she does this because you let her do it.

Long answer: It's a test to check if you're a man or a pussy, and you failed it repeatedly, therefore affirming your position as her sissy bitch. Normally shit tests take less violent forms (like snark or light insults) but I've seen stuff like that happen too. How about applying some good old gender equality?

https://i.imgur.com/KEY353C.png

[Asker]

Punch her in the boob you're saying haha? She might deserve it

[WalterBlack]

I'd go with the old snap the back of her bra strap like a rubber band. *ouch* I just couldn't think of hurting a nice pair of boobs. LOL. 😄

[Anonymous]

Hahahaha dude that's so funny. Sorry about your balls. I'd say definitely don't punch her in the boob because she will make your nuts flat. Probably just talk with her about it.

[Asker]

Yeah I wouldn't want flat nuts that's for sure

[Opinion Owner]

Yeah be careful

[TVerbeeck]

Restrain and play wrestle with her, see what happens? on the bright side your testicles should be made of steel by now, it is proven the more you get hit there, the more resistent and less pain you will feel

[Asker]

Maybe she's conditioning me then haha, I hope not...

[TVerbeeck]

Speaking as I have 5 sisters, and use to do extreme wrestling with buddies of mine, yeah eventually you'll be hit and feel nothing. it's great but then it makes people question when someone randomly hits you there even by accident and you go about like it's nothing

[Asker]

Haha good point

[TVerbeeck]

But then you can make the Duke Nukem joke and say "I've got balls of steel"

[nasarita]

Punch her boobs and tell her to grow stronger.

[Asker]

I think if I punch her in the tit she's use my nuts as a punching bag for a while. I mean wouldn't you be pissed if someone hit your boob?

[nasarita]

I would be pissed, but aren't you? She's been using your nuts for awhile as a punching bag. You should tell her to stop or prank her by saying you have a reproduction problem and you don't know why and see her reaction.

[Asker]

Hash that's true. When I said the punching bag thing I meant like I'd hit her and then she'd like hold me down and just beat them up. I know she's been abusing them for a while. Maybe I'll try both. I'll hit her boob and later try the prank. Is there a best way to hurt a tit? Punch, slap, squeeze, pinch? I don't know

[WalterBlack]

If you are hoping that she secretly likes you, that might not be the best approach.

[Asker]

It's s good excuse to touch her boobs though haha

[nasarita]

You shouldn't try it, just ask her what is wrong and you don't like it. I think she's the kind of girls who likes you but she can't show it to you because she don't want you to know that she likes you, so she ended up getting bullied or hurt because of her. Just talk to her to stop and flirt with her like: "You know that if you do this to me that there's a huge chance that we might not having kids because of you constantly kicking my nuts" And see her reaction

[nasarita]

so you ended up*

[nasarita]

so you end up*

[WalterBlack]

That cross posted. I was responding to @nasarita's suggestion. Boobs are meant to be grabbed, squeezed, jiggled, kissed, etc but not punched. I'd say slap her ass real good instead.

[WalterBlack]

@nasarita, I like that suggestion better :)

[nasarita]

@WalterBlack I think he needs to tell her that she shouldn't kick his nuts but fondle it instead.

[WalterBlack]

@nasarita Now you're talking 👍😉

[nasarita]

@WalterBlack HAHAHAHAHAHAHHACEDBCCEJDHHHAHAHAHHA

[Asker]

Haha yeah I would enjoy them fondled or kissed. Whatever she wants to do. I think you're both right, you make very good points and that's what I should do. I just hope that this whole ball hurting thing isn't some weird kinky thing she's into and she's acting out with me.

[nasarita]

If she keeps doing the kicking balls thing you should drag her to your house and perform the exorcism.

[Asker]

Hahaha yeah ill get a priest and everything. That is, if I could get her there. It's not easy to make someone do what you want when they know your weak spot haha. I guess that's why they say got them by the balls. I'm so glad you're all concerned for the well being of my testicles!

[Asker]

Someone else posted that if she keeps hitting them they will get stronger and become balls of steel. So maybe if nothing I do works and she keeps doing it I'll become an invincible person who can make money by telling people they can kick me in the nuts for 5$ because it won't hurt me. Or maybe if I have invincible balls I'll become sort of science experiment. WHo knows

[nasarita]

And you'll have your own superhero movie called the Testicle-Boy who can shot superfluid because of his super balls. LOLOLOLOL

[Asker]

Testicle boy who's large balls of steel crash through villains and kill them. When my nuts are that strong you can all have a free kick to test them to pay you for the help with this!

[Asker]

I'm sure once they are steel they could be used as a form of stress relief. Stress balls lol

[udhaya]

Just playing

[Asker]

It's not very fun, I mean she thinks it is and maybe she is just playing because it kind of looks like that. However, it doesn't feel good... she hasn't done anything that left me hurting too bad yet but im worried she will because she thinks it's funny