Men, generally speaking, are achievers and goal oriented by nature. They love the challenge of getting what they want. In life, in business and in love. They love not knowing if they will get what they want and they love the feeling of success when they finally do. They love the hunt and the chase after all of their goals including you.
GENERALLY speaking. Some men are different (lazy) and I’ll tell you why those are the men you don’t want anyway. Some say men like us to approach them first. And some do. The lazy ones who want to come by women easy. They will take what comes their way. If a woman is going to make it easier for him to meet/date/sleep with her, what’s not to like? But you want him to desire you madly, not “like” that you made his job easier.
When women approach men, it may be a temporary ego boost but it’s not the thrill he’s wired for and he knows immediately that this is not his dream woman. She’s not the woman he’ll swim through shark water for. His dream woman is the one he WANTS to approach, chase, work for, impress, win over, fall in love with, protect and treat like his queen. Her value is obvious and high the moment he lays eyes on her because she doesn’t make it easy for him or any other man by chasing after them. Do you want to be the woman who approached him, initiated the conversation, kept it going to show him all your fabulous qualities and hoped he found you attractive? Let’s say he did find you attractive when he first noticed you across the room. Either he wasn’t into you enough to cross the room to approach you (in which case, why would you want him?) or he may have intended to approach you before the night ended but you lowered your value as a prize to be won by usurping him. You took the thrill away.
So there you are anyway showing him how interested YOU are in HIM. And no doubt you are cute so he says to himself, “Hell, she’s into me, I’ll go with it”. So you have a few dates and you’re not sure how he feels but since you are the “liberated woman of today” who makes her destiny happen, you plan dates, call him, leave cute messages on his voice mail, try to wow him with great sex, continue to be the pursuer because that is the dynamic YOU set up from the moment you met and you’ve convinced yourself that it turned him on. In reality, he can sit back, enjoy the ride and decide slowly while having sex with you if he really likes you or even wants to keep seeing you.
You can't completely avoid rejection. Just don't hit on anyone when you're drunk because that will guarantee rejection. (Unless he's drunk too and just wants some.)
I have only had one girl come up to me with interest in a relationship (that I am aware of, I'm awful at reading signs). I didn't reject her, but rather had her as my girlfriend for the next two years (we just recently broke up), and she was almost everything I could ask for in a girlfriend. The fact that she approached was actually nice; it let me know that she was confident enough to get what she wanted rather than just sitting around and feeling entitled. And entitlement in a woman is a HUGE turn-off for me.
However, I have rejected a girl who wanted sex. Several things were wrong with her:
1. She was a heavy smoker, so her breath smelled horrible
2. She was really drunk that night
3. I was still with my girlfriend at the time
4. It was about 4:00 AM, and I was getting tired
She was pretty, too, but I wouldn't cheat on my girlfriend.
not many girls approach me, I had this one girl try to pick me up but she was really bitchy, she actually tried to neg me, which is basically using an insult + she was ugly and drunk, the best approach is when a girl comments on something positive, I'm not shallow but I love it when a girl compliments me on my looks :)
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