Why girls don't know what they want?

[Anonymous]

why so confused the way you treat a guy who you are attracted to

acting so cold one day and another day you were so sweet to him

i never been cold to girl I am attracted to I am always sweet to her even if I barely know her

[justathought]

Okay, so the same thing happened with me and my crush. I felt like he was playing games with me. He would flirt, make eye contact, etc. on some days. Then on other days he would totally ignore me. Then I saw him with a few different women over the summer. Yes I am assuming he was dating them. Yes women do assume but what else was I to think? Yet he would still flirt with me. That got me so pissed. So then I started ignoring him because I thought he was a player and just trying to get a one nighter with me and that's not what I wanted.

Another thing that got me mad was that I never had a situation like this...the constant flirting and then not being asked out. All of the guys in my past have just asked me out right away.

Waiting for a definite sign that she likes you is a total waste of time on both of your parts. Just ask her out and be done with it. If she says no, then that's her loss. It could be that this girl is confused...maybe you are giving her mixed signals. I know you said you're not cold to her but maybe she thinks you should have asked her out by now if you REALLY liked her and you're playing a game. Think about it...girls constantly have guys whistling, yelling, and straight out asking them out. Then you come along and you do like her but decide to be subtle until you see if she is really interested before you take the plunge. Okay, fine. But how long is too long to wait? The longer you wait, the more she's gonna think you're not that into her.

[Asker]

the problem is she is pretending and I can't confront,so I just let her go

[Tigerlily]

This isn't just something women do. I'm guessing the logic is similar for the guys that do it too, though perhaps not always. Sometimes it'll be that she's trying not to appear too clingy or desperate or maybe trying to keep you interested by switching it up. Might be that she really is just confused, for whatever reason, as to whether or not she really likes you. Might be that she feels you're being that way with her; you can be sweet to a guy you like, feel he's not getting the message and then get sorta angry and back off for a bit. Could be anything really.

[TigerRoseBear]

Omg, thank you. I think you just answered why the girl I like is so weird. Sometimes she's mean to me, sometimes she's nice, and maybe it's because she got frustrated being nice to me. Thanks :)

So, I know she likes me back. Should I go out of my way to be nice to her? I just don't want it to be that she stops liking me because I stop being a "challenge". By the way, she doesn't know I like her (maybe she guesses I do from some signs) and she doesn't know that I know she likes me.

[Tigerlily]

Haha, well it is pretty damn frustrating when you're trying to be nice to someone to get a message across and they're just not getting it, or not liking it, or something. But I think it's less about being a challenge with guys than it is with girls... I'm not really sure, but that's what I think.

I think you should be nice... but only if you can keep it up. If you're hot and cold, she'll just end up thinking the same thing about you that we're asking about here!

[confused415]

maybe its the way your approaching her. Are you playing hard to get as well? Most likely, she is acting cold in order to get your attention and to see how much you like her and once she feels you pull away, she becomes warmer. Maybe become more open to her and let her feel at ease and make it obvious your here to like her, not play games.

[DizzyLizzie]

I have never done this to a guy. I tend to fall quickly because I like the positive attention, and that's how I get burned.

It sounds like this person might be wishy-washy about how they feel about you. Are you in her face too much? It's possible she might be afraid that you're pushing too much too soon?

[Asker]

you are a girl ? how come you answers is coming under guys section

nah I don't think so ,its like she pretends that she didn't notice me when I am right before her and when I am not there she loooks for me

[Asker]

your answer*

[Asker]

you posted the comments under another guy's answer,

when you signed up here you might have mistakenly selected your gender as a male

[Anonymous]

It takes girls longer to develop feelings than guys. I say if she's giving you mixed signals which by what you said she is give it time

[Asker]

she started it and I end up pursing her :(

[dragonfly6516]

Guys develop feelings first? Huh, funny but I've never heard of a guy planning out the wedding on the first date. Girls won't pursue a guy if she doesn't already have feelings. We don't see a potential sex partner like most men do, we see a potential father and husband.

[justathought]

Girls generally do "start it" and guys are programmed by nature to be the pursuer. So pursue, ask her out and don't waste any more time analyzing signs! Good luck! :)

[Anonymous]

Usually this happens when we are unsure about what the guy really wants. I'm kind of going through this rite now...but the guy is hot & cold...so I do the same thing back..its getting us no where. It stems down to fears of being hurt..& it's pretty dumb.

[lillianAngie]

ditto!

[Anonymous]

are you sure you've never been cold to someone you are attracted to? Because girls tend to give hints in conversations (HOT), and 80% of the time you guys miss it (COLD).. and than we get disappointed (COLD)!

The best listeners and the most sensitive guys never get hot and cold treatment from girls!

[cranberry]

If I like a guy and he's not asking me out , yes, I will be cold to him. If I want to be asked out and I go week after week frusturated and wondering if he likes me, eventually , I will lose interest and might be cold to him.

[Anonymous]

guys do this all the freaking time. when they stop playing games, I will too

[Anonymous]

ask her out before you you regret it cause she will lose interest /think your not interested been there done that

[brandonc308]

When you find out let me know...

[DizzyLizzie]

yeah I am a girl! I am trying to figure out why it says I'm a guy lol. it's making it hard for me to get answers to my questions lol.