Why don’t guys know what girls want?

Question

I mean sometimes I get mad at someone , I complained about it and he acted like he doesn’t know what I want him to do!! Do guys really don’t know what girls want from him?

TwinTonyz · Accepted Answer

Are you expressing what you want in plan speech, or are you using literally anything else?

It's a ludicrous modern standard to expect men to decipher non-verbal cues and expression with absolute accuracy, yet the standard lives on. I harken back to my mother's antics of setting non-descript goals about the house. If something so general as "clean up" were demanded, that was a trap. Anything which wasn't placed in its explicit perfect location was defined by her undisclosed methods, thus incurring her wrath.

Women, often, speak in what's functionally a completely different language than men do in that even clearly spoken statements rarely align with their dictionary meanings. At the most extreme fringes, we could consider flirting with a stranger, a first engagement, as an example. You might recognize the phrase "no means no" which is rather transparent. Yet, men must cope with the idea that yes means no, yes means no perhaps some days afterwards when she's no longer interested. No means yes, because she's trying to see if you'll try to earn her, and if you won't fight for her, you're not a good man, as a good man would fight for what he wants. These are common ideologies.

Plainly speaking, if even "yes" and "no" cannot align with dictionary definitions, when addressing women, nothing can.

Lionman95 · Accepted Answer

I think though guys and girls are similar in what they want they are different in how to show it oftentimes guys and girls could be the direct opposite in their behavior. Here´s where problem starts because everybody thinks what they and how they react to something is common knowledge and therefore needs no further explaination misunderstanding happens.
An example is the way and need for communication while women find security in talking about something and with someone men don´t have that much of a need for it. Guys can be alone for long and don´t hear from other guys for a long time and still feel they are good buddies.
It´s same with communication in a certain situation because many of us guys are direct communicators in terms of saying what you when you want it straight away it´s harder for us to listen and understand a woman speaks in a way that goes with the flow.
To answer your question in short: No in most situation I´d say guys don´t know what woman because while you oftentimes go with the flow of ideas saying what you want guys have a hard time following in therefore will stop listen carefully after some times and don´t get what you were saying.

Screenwriter · Accepted Answer

No one is a mindreader. Just because you like or love someone doesn't give them superpowers to know your personal needs!

This seems to be a naive romantic notion. "My love will grant my every wish and know me through and through." No such luck. There's a slim to none chance you might find someone like this, but more likely you meet an average Joe (or Josephine) who loves you and tries to help and please you.

If you find anyone who seeks to help and please you, tell them what you'd like to get from them: This goes for what to get from the grocery store to what kind of jewelry or fragrance you like. You favorite slippers or PJs.. The movie you'll watch two dozen times and quote from.

Give a guy a break. This has nothing to do with what sex anyone is. The only people who know you IS you, your siblings, best friend and your parents. If you reveal yourself to your partner, that's the only way they'll have a clue.

Now if it's clear you HAVE been doing the former and your partner isn't paying attention, that's a different story altogether.

PhenomenalQueen · Accepted Answer

A guy knows the basics, so if he’s not meeting the bare minimum than say bye to him… Also, men aren’t dumb, they do for who they want… For example, how you noticed how some girls will beg a guy to do certain things and after they’re not together anymore, he “acts right” for another girl? Sometimes it’s nothing about you, it’s simply we’re not the girl for them.

OlderAndWiser · Answer

Guys and girls make the same mistake.

A guy has a problem with a girlfriend. He thinks about what he would be thinking or feeling in a particular situation and he expects that his girlfriend should be thinking or feeling the same things. He fails to take into account that there are fundamental differences in the way that guys and girls view things and respond, based on our biology, our upbringing, our culture, and our experiences. Because he fails to account for the differences, he can't understand why his girlfriend is reacting as she is. In reality, it would be astounding if guys and girls DID respond the same way in a situation. And girls do the same thing and can't understand why guys react as they do.

All, of course, because Eve ate the apple in the garden of Eden.

CuriousJC · Answer

This is What women want This is what women see in the eyes of men. A tree that grows money. It seems women want everything but they don't know what they want first. Instead of asking the guy to get her something that is reasonable she rather empty the man's wallet entirely until he has nothing left causing her to leave him.

Pyrofox · Answer

Well for starters we don't MIND READ XD. If you don't tell us we gonna just assume things are alright. Its like if you want something then like tell us or hand us the red hot metaphorical fireplace poker and tell us what you want XD. Men are strictly factual and if you got a man hook, line and sinker. Its kinda your own fault if you haven't told us what your goals and where you want to be in a year, 5 years or 10 years. Its hard for us to set goals. If we don't know that you have them. The number one rule of a relationship is communication. I'd rather have a girl stab my hand (metaphorically) and be literal and factual than assume I can guess. Cause the average person isn't actually good at guessing answers. To a question or topic they haven't been told. Even riddles to a degree have their answer inside of them.

TommyMountainFigure · Answer

Haven't you worked it out yet? If you want to get your own way, the way to go about it isn't by losing your temper. Most guys I know will use that against you.
For example:-
if you go berserk at me, my response isn't to lose my temper back, it's to make out I have absolutely no idea what you're on about and that is how you deal with spoilt brats who think the world owes them.
Now if you are civil, I as well as most other guys will go out of their way to accommodate you.

Don't be under any illusion in thinking we don't know what is really going on though.. We aren't stupid!

SkyCastle90 · Answer

Men share a lot of similarities with each other (same for women), but in the end it depends on the individual; so avoid judging men/women as a whole based on this one person, because this is how you become bitter. Everyone is different, you just got to learn to decipher the good from the trash.

From what I'm reading it sounds like you need to be more direct and concise with what you want.

DamnSam · Answer

From experience, most times bc men can't smell what their lady wants... evolution gave us a mouth for that...

Ladies, pls learn to stand up to yourself...

Women tend often to use hints as method...

Let's be real, a 6x2 feet neon banner with lights and hearts and some arrows to ensure he doesn't miss it... I swear, 49 of 50 guys still wouldn't see that at all...

"Clear words support clear actions"
Write that down

I bet putin did also hint that he will invade the ukraine... 😆 perfect example how that usual works out

Hellraiser1984 · Answer

Um because of you reading magazines with their f ing quizzes that you live and die by. Websites that spout the same Bs. Plus the feminist hatred of men. Remember all men are pigs? I read a sexual harassment pamphlet from my college. The male side is very much saying what you can't do the female side is what they can do and signs that the male is going to attack/rape/ stalk/ kill them. Plus it says nothing to males about false accusations of rape what a guys rights are if accused. Basically in "overcoming" your male "oppressors" you've become just as "bad" as we "are". And you will never admit that you do nothing wrong and if you do it's because a male abused you and made you do it. Women rape, kill, molest, steal, commit fraud, get drunk and high, speed, abuse too.

MCheetah · Answer

Because even girls don't know what girls want and girls are never the least bit consistent with what they want, other than "not you or most men." Besides girls wanting the most elite, rarest, best looking men, there's not a single consistency to what girls want, not even among themselves. That's why SMART men never take dating advice from women.

yucychan · Answer

If you want your guy to do something or want something from him, just tell him directly. Don't play mind games and expect him to guess what you really want.

integrale77 · Answer

Me and my girlfriend are working on open discussion about how things affect each other right down to details of things that neither of can personally understand.

Discussing things on here has given me a better understanding of the opposite sex.

Biggest thing to remember is never assume when you ask something to one of us guys if we don't 100% understand we might guess to fill in the blanks but if we even look slightly confused be ready to explain.

JustiReno · Answer

see this is the problem women don’t know what they want either so it’s up to men to create that thing from scratch and hopefully it appeases the queen 🙇‍♂️

ohshee · Answer

This proves my point guys are very selfish they make it all about themselves that's why they don't understand women or even hear them or even know what they want or what they like or don't like they're too busy focusing on themselves and why girls don't understand this I would just keep walking if I was a girl

expdude · Answer

Guys were made to feel respected. Women were made to feel loved. The two differences keep us in a cycle of competition. One needing respect and the other needing to feel loved. She doesn’t feel loved she does / says things that make him feel disrespected. He withdrawals feeling like a looser and retaliates with anger which makes her feel unloved. It black and white in the Bible. His created us different. We can either feed each other or feed on each other.

lightbulb27 · Answer

yes some don't, it's a matter of training. at that age, they can be very selfish and unaware. you will have to learn to communicate, teach, work together. guys and girls communicate differently in general, but there's challenges communicating with anyone.

good luck!

20yearsolder · Answer

Just because you want him to do it, why is he required to do it? You don't think we feel the same way about women? Honey what's wrong with you, nothing. We know there's something wrong but we don't know what the fuck it is. You'd rather sit there and sulk about it than speak about it

DonkeyDan · Answer

No we don't because we aren't mind reader's, women are vague at the best of times, sometimes don't even know what they want when directly asked, so how would we know.
If we try and guess from insinuations and help, we're wrong. If we choose not too read into something and stay out of it we're wrong.
If you want a man to know what you want, just tell him, it's real easy.

HighValue · Answer

Because often they don't know what they want themselves. When they say one thing and you do it for them, they can change their mind, not appreciate it, and then want you to do something else instead.

At least be direct. Don't use hints, just plainly say exactly what you want.

stark04 · Answer

You must be confused with those mind reading vampires guys and that's fiction, in real life guys can't read mind so instead of complaining just tell them what you want them to do, dumb down things for them. You're superior, smart, sophisticated girl so just be direct and stop judging guys for not being the smart. 😀

FilmGuy93 · Answer

We don't know because we aren't you. We don't know what anyone besides us is feeling. That's why communicating is so important.

I don't understand why so many women have an issue with just communicating what they want men to do. Y'all seem to think that men should just intuit what you're thinking/feeling without having to say it; that's just not how adult relationships work.

PhoenixAl · Answer

Because guys think like guys and girls think like girls.
Also nobody is required to understand someone. I believe in talking about things that upset us or make us happy just express yourself and that way you give sb space to know you bettee

Fireguy17 · Answer

Some are just clueless, even after you tell them.
Not sure if they simply are not listening, or just have no clue.
At somepoint if you aren't seeing the results that you are looking for, then you have to figure out if you want to keep trying, or call it and move on and find someone that will listen to you.
Good luck!

TheMajesticKing777 · Answer

Did it ever come to mind that maybe he doesn't wanna do it, something I've noticed is that if you play dumb, you can get away with a lot because no one suspects from the dumbass lol

eblehe · Answer

Tell him what you want him to do. How is he supposed to know your mind.

AydenHazor · Answer

Guys have no idea what you want from them! They're immediate instinct is to help you by solving your problems. If you want him to do something for you, you need to communicate what you want from him, and that includes if you want him to just listen and be mad with you.

TexasRed95 · Answer

No we really don't. Men and women's brains are very different. Not just that but men are extremely straight forward. In what little experience I have around women you like to not say what's on your mind at all. A guy could ask repeatedly what's going on and women will still refuse to answer.

DaddyRollingStone · Answer

Cause you don’t tell us

girls dubbed themselves as the communicating sex but would rather die than say how they feel in a straightforward manner. To all you teenagers of either sex, do you think its possible to be with someone for multiple years without ever discussing your emotions plainly?

KatieB713 · Answer

My guy knows me well enough to know what I want, but that's only because we talk and communicate a lot

Waldoe · Answer

It is true, I'm 72 and still clueless, thank God she has learned to tell me... hehehe. "Hey, you're not supposed to laugh" or " what the Hell, hit that asshole with a tire iron' yes, we are dense and always will be... but we are teachable... sometimes we even pay attention, ok yes, we are pitiful, ill-tempered and disloyal. I try, and so do most guys.. I KNOW... Blame GOD... He can take it, He has Broad shoulders

NiListicIntelectual · Answer

Cos we ain't girls. We can only guess. Some guys guess different things. My guess is girls jus want a sweet loving man who never insults or argues with her, a strong man who can protect her... But maybe I'm wrong? Maybe loving guys are a turn off and seem like faggots? I dunno

007kingifrit · Answer

knowing that women want us to hear a problem and just listen instead of try and fix it is one of the hardest things for young men to learn. it flies counter to everything men are built to do

men and women really are VERY different and yes. we don't understand you

ZackBan · Answer

I literally couldn't figure out what you want him to do even reading this 😂 Just stop expecting him to know and TELL him. "I want you to wack this guy"

Adam1978 · Answer

Maybe he just isn't interested in giving you what you want. Most likely because that isn't who he is. He isn't into make your life into a Disney princess dream. Because to be real most of what you want goes against our interests.

Mofunfour20 · Answer

Guys don't care what you want if they just want sex, they will enhance their truth just like women use makeup. Let's be honest here, women don't even know what they want. Never ask a woman where she wants to eat guys, THEY DON'T KNOW.

fonduegirl · Answer

Because he's not biologically a female. Your female friends or your mother can understand it, but unless and until you directly tell him what's wrong, he wouldn't know.

DeepPassionateLover · Answer

Men are simple creatures, talk to us plainly and honestly and you'll be perfectly fine.

Anonymous · Answer

Men do know what women want, but women refuse to admit what they actually want and say shit that they think sounds good as opposed to what their actions actually suggest.

Women want to play childish games, they want to test men to “see how much he cares”, they want the guy to chase them and read their minds. They want drama.

Guys know this and refuse to play the stupid games anymore.

clampfan101 · Answer

Sounds more like not listening well enough. Everyone has their moments when they don’t listen well during an argument. We all need to try to express stress more calmly.

dustybiker · Answer

Why are there still people of both genders that can’t communicate with their partner? Don’t speak up they won’t know.

UniquelyBasic · Answer

If it can't be fixed with our penis then were at a loss on what to do

Preston_Tatum · Answer

Nah 😂 I think it was really just that no one really has figured women out. There for a while I think I thought that I had mostly figured them out but then I was reminded how wrong I was lol

jimmy2 · Answer

They want a man:
That will unconditionally love her.
A man that can clearly talk.
A man who will forgive for no one is perfect
A man who help help her when i child comes
A man who will bring safety to her
A man who will provide

This Pademic haa dating turn upside down
Women want a man to be a man and suck it up and go out there and work for your blessings
Finally a man who loves God

Staximus · Answer

Guys don't know what girls want because either the girl is not making what she wants clear (is a poor communicator) , or he's not paying attention, or she doesn't know what she wants.

melanieeeB · Answer

Nobody can read your mind! Open your mouth and communicate! Damn it.

ARWINGx1 · Answer

To me, it feels like it may be especially harder for me, since I can struggle to understand what one feels when they're being "subtle", or vague about it.

Cathy7734 · Answer

I always find if I don't know what a guy wants it's usually because he doesn't know what he wants either. It's probably true vice-versa too.

Dragonstarterplus · Answer

Because girls dont even know what girls want As a wise philosopher once said: "Don't try to understand women. Women understand women and they hate each other."

Anonymous · Answer

If you're referring to what girls want during sex, not all guys instinctively know and need guidance as it's not something that's usually covered in the birds-and-bees talk from parents.

Jamie05rhs · Answer

Have you ever TOLD him? Then no; he doesn't know. What is it with you people that makes you think we have psychic powers? Who told you that lie? Which fairy tale was that in? Tell me; I'm really curious.

Kaamraj · Answer

Men communicate directly, if you want something then say it. We aren't mind readers. Secondly, do women know what they want?

slatyb · Answer

Yes, they really don’t. They think that every time you express frustration it is a problem for them to solve.

demonics · Answer

Because women don't know what they want either: Maybe get on the same page?

SomeGuyCalledTom · Answer

If girls don't even know what girls want, what the fuck kinda chance do we have? 😂

Twalli · Answer

You aren't clear about it. We want a guy to grab us a sandwich we say "dude, get me a sandwich" as opposed to a girl who thinks a guy will know what she wants by giving him signals that no guy ever notices.

abc3643 · Answer

We don't have the psychic abilities that women have and incorrectly believe that we have too.

RawIronhide · Answer

Yo how tf we supposed to know what you want when y'all don't even know what you want?

Agape93 · Answer

Communication is key and frankly people tend to suck at it

Entechad · Answer

I get it. It's rough being the opposite sex, so why do you not know what guys want?

Godsvengeance · Answer

We have no idea and that's not helped by the fact that most women don't even know what they want. How could we know if you don't?

Anonymous · Answer

No, we often don't know what you want. Why? Two reasons. First, you often don't know what the hell you want. That is just a fact and we all know it. And second, you are often terrible about communicating what you want. We can't read your minds.

IsoUser · Answer

As a guy for over 50 years, trying to understand you girls, I swear to God that we have never things out. We are of two different minds even our sex drives are different

Why don’t guys know what girls want?

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