Koolaid, please understand that different circumstances have caused people to become shy. It has very little to do with you. Unfortunately you may be very friendly, very attractive, both, and a shy person can thing "wow! such an awesome person wouldn't want anything to do with me"
They'd love to say hi but it's beyond their emotional control. If you see someone you want to meet who appears shy (I've been told I'm stuck up when the fact is I too am just shy) try approaching HIM. Oh that may scare him away fast but just maybe... he'll have the courage to respond.
There was one dazzler. She's about 3 years older than me namded Doris. Oh wow drop dead gorgeous IMHO. My parents worked for a nearby theme park back then (1981) and she was a dancer at one of the shows. Because dad worked there I had a free season pass and went almost every day. I learned how to strategically position myself at the theatre door so I could get a front seat in front of where she was positioned on stage. She knew I was there. She made eye contact with me often. One day apparently there was a company barbecue. I wasn't invited. But Doris was there. And dad was there. She recognized him and it turns out she had a letter she had written to me. The envelope says "Dear Sean"
And inside, July 8/82 (I haven't reviewed the letter in a long time)
Dear Sean: Hi, it's great to know that I have a fan. I wish I knew you, and could have had the chance to talk to you. Unfortunately I will not be performing @ CWL (Canada's Wonderland) anymore. I'll be up a few times and hope to see ya. Anyways good luck in what ever your future plans desire. Love Always, Doris P.S. Keep Smiling Always, I will!
The point to this: I was shy. Damn shy. I saw her as the loveliest creature on earth at the time and I just didn't have the courage to approach her. It's not easy for shy people. And it's not your fault. I saw her ONCE outside of backstage. My only chance to say hello if I had the guts. I didn't.
It seems you don't know how hard it is to be shy. It's not a choice. But when a person has been burned enough, it's hard to get out of the ashes and try again.
-now to put that letter back in the filing cabinet. It has its own file folder complete with a few pictures and even a newspaper article.
Go to a park/beach, for example, and sit alone by yourself reading something simple like a magazine, not a school book or a novel, as that can seem to say "I'm busy!" to a guy and it keeps your eyes planted on the book too long. Look around from time to time, look as if you're looking at guys. Also, no cellphones. Headphones, okay. The reason for the phone is that it tells people to leave you alone.
This is a good way to set yourself up to be approached. Shy guys do NOT like approaching a girl in the middle of her pack of female friends. Only the confident guys can do that. That don't be disappointed if guys don't approach even then. I've approached many a girl on the California beach where I grew up and most told me they have a boyfriend, or just snubbed me off. And the reason for that was the girls was not a "looker" and didn't return my smile. But I went ahead and tried. And so remember too that maybe shy guys got shot down a lot, those they're probably going through a "I don't want to even bother" phase.
those kind of guys don't generally just walk up to girls and approach them. guys like this are the ones that you get to know. usually he may not ask you out right off the bat, but you will be able to tell he likes you. so you start talking to him more, pay him more attention and show him signs that you like him. these kind of guys are more subtle and don't really chase girls.
notice how I did not say that you should be the man in the relationship and pursue a guy that has no confidence or balls! a shy nice guy does not mean that he is a p**** ass bitch. a man can be reserved, laid back and respectful. I think that is what you are looking for. if he is confident he will eventually pursue you, he just might not look at you and pursue you off first glance. he will make the move to date you after he knows you and gets a vibe for who you are as a person. half these guys on this site consider "shy and nice" as code word for socially awkward/weak/spineless and what girl wants that? sounds like you want a guy who is respectful and a decent person. well you don't have to settle for a no balls wimp to find that in a man. good luck
I get approached by creepers and older guys. It's not fun. I wish guys my age would man up. I'm too nice and talk to strangers out of politeness.
Try being proactive and approaching guys you think seem nice and shy. I should probably take my own advice.
So you have the same problem as the rest of us girls. Try approaching them. It gets easier and you will be pleasently surprised with the results.
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18Opinion
well a lot of guys are too shy to approach women, and seeing that your a pretty lady that
could easily scare them away from approaching you, because pretty girls normally
have high standards. the best thing to do, is if you go to school, or any other place that
you see regularly, then you might want to say high to them if you sit next to them, but
still give them their space don't talk too much at first, other wise it might scare them off.
Because your are incredibly attractive. You have the look of someone already dating a stud.
Most shy guys become introverted because they are unsure of whether or not their values are acceptable in society. Usually some early psychological trauma results in this. ie, Billy was caught dancing in his room by his father and was told to "stop being a little fruitcup". Suddenly, poor little Billy develops those mental inhibitions when it comes to expressing himself.
Shy nice guys usually have to be approached, or given strong hints that you are attracted. For the most part their mind won't allow them to make a move first.
well if you are the girl in your pictures (and I say thta because I've recognized several girls on here from other sites who fake on here because theyre probably fat ugly chicks) then its because you're hot and you're expected to reject everyone who isn't douchebag asshole.
im not a "shy" or "nice guy" and I'm not an "asshole" either (although I think people would label me an asshole if they had to choose) but in most a lot of situations I wouldn't approach you because I'd assume you think I had "nice guy" mask on as you put it and trying to get with you. so I feel like you'd reject me even if you weren't being obviously rude about it
Douchbags sometimes have more aggression and confidence is why they approach you.
The reason nice guys don't approach you is a world of reasons. Looking at your photo icon, you're attractive. THey think you have a boyfriend...they don't know what to say when they think you've heard it all...they think you're thinking that they're just hitting on you for sex, and that makes them uncomfortable that you might snub them off for that unless they got some "game" talk capacity...
Just remember that boys want to have sex, and if they just come out and say it, you'll slap them. So they have to play poker. Some are good at it, others are not. So are just a few of the dozens of reasons boys don't approach girls. It's a LOT more difficult than you think, and it's something girls will never understand fully until they walk in a boy/man's shoes.
Well, probably because these guys are:
1.) Intimidated by you
2.) Too smart to go into the whole dating game (flirting, playing tricks and all that)
3.) Aren't attracted to you (yes, beautiful, hot, attractive women can be seen as beautiful, but not attractive to some guys.)
4.) Shy and introverted
5.) Think with all the guys who approach you, odds are one of the more "alpha male types" has a better chance with you than they do.
I could be one or a combination of these reasons.
Because they're shy. Approaching is against their nature because it involves getting over personal hurdles that more confident men don't deal with, and the difficulty of it is increased exponentially when the woman is intimidating such as you most likely are.
You are attractive and shy guys may feel intimidated or feel you have a guy. If you want a shy guy you will have work at it. If you know such a guy you are going to have to make the situation comfortable for him. help them approach you -- flirt, smile, make eye contact, etc.
if you notice a guy looking at you or something, just approach him. odds are he's very shy and most deff won't turn you down. if that's actually you in your pics he'll be very happy to talk with you. its not always the guy that has to approach you. mix it up and you might get a welcome surprise from the guy and yourself. trust me on this, I speak from plenty of experience. I have never been approached but I have looked at plenty of women and wish that either I could talk to them or they would talk to me.
well I am judging but that's only because this is the internet and I don't know you personally but anyways
you look like a girl who loves to party and likes the asshole type of guy so that's what attracts you
A shy good guy would almost never go up and talk to you because of the way you look I mean think about it this good guy is probably scared to talk to a girl that looks like you because you probably have tons and tons of guys wanting to go after you so why would a nice guy just want to be another contact in your phonebook?
the main point is its because of the way you look and the stereotype that comes with having that look
I think shy guys would just look at you and think that because you're really pretty, that you're kinda out of their league and that you wouldn't be interested or attracted to them... Or that if they approach you and stutter & stumble and basically make a fool of them self, you'll get sick of them or something and just kick or knee them in the balls as hard as you can and walk off laughing! lol Not that you would like I guess? lol
A lot of guys get intimidated by beautiful women. Not saying its your fault but not too many guys have what it takes to go up to a lady and say hi. The douchers don't have a problem cus they do it with the "on to the next one attitude."
shy, intimidated, unsure what to say, scared of rejection, insecure...i could go on.
Still am at 37 years old...
Try talking to him... be kind, ask questions.. not too many, show an interest... you might eventually have to ask him out.
Cause there too shy and intimidated by your beauty. They might not have the self confidence to approach you and fear rejection. If you really want a shy guy your probably going to have to make the first move.
It's because they're shy. Shy guys don't approach anybody. It's not your fault, it's just the way we are and it's a really difficult mindset to break out of.
How do you know they have a "nice mask" on? How do you determine what guys are genuinely nice and what ones are putting on a show?
You sound like a nice Girl, I think you are better off approaching them as long as don't do it when he is with other people so try getting him alone and just ask him out because he is more likely to be shyer than you.
Right!! I feel ya. But tbh, coming from someone who used to be shy,
most people who are shy are just being cautious.
Shy nice guys don't talk to girls. They're too shy.
Shy men aren't men worthy of dating. Why would you need a scary cat?
They wait for girls to approach them
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